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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

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This talk of lying b*****ds makes me think of footballers chatting up women and saying they're a footballer and kidding on they're a big player when in actual fact they're Stoneyburn's reserve left back. 
I guy I know done this successfully once before the good lass he took home on the friday went through the McDonalds drive through when he was working 4 days later. Safe to say he never heard from her again.

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9 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

This talk of lying b*****ds makes me think of footballers chatting up women and saying they're a footballer and kidding on they're a big player when in actual fact they're Stoneyburn's reserve left back. 

Circa 1991, I once told a lady in Abertay student Union that I’d just moved to Dundee and had signed for Dundee FC. I said I didn’t know anyone in the city but had inadvertently ended up in a student Union by accident.

Never got my end away but I did score against Airdrie the following week.

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20 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

My mate doesn't tell lies but he does recount the same stories very repetitively, to the extent he uses exactly the same language and pauses for effect etc.

I always wonder how he can have perfect recall of his story, but not remember he's told it a hundred times.

My dad does this, to the extent that he'll repeat and then correct the same mistake each time.

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2 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

On lies, Cheesy Morrison went around Elgin telling everyone that he had bought the Bishops (infamous nightclub in Elgin) and that he had organised to fight Frank Bruno there at the opening.

He was in first year high school at the time.

Think it was a lie tbh.

He'd probably have won.

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7 minutes ago, GordonD said:

He'd probably have won.

It wouldn't have surprised me. Cheesy was mental and about 6'4'' even at the age of about 13.

And ginger (hence the name Cheesy).

I had a quick search for him to see if hes still on the go and came across his FB profile.  He seems to gone Sevco.

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On 11/06/2021 at 23:29, Boo Khaki said:

This is a deliberate design ploy in order to limit the number of poor unfortunates who inadvertently find themselves headed to Fife through no fault of their own. This is why there is also a roundabout at the immediate far end of the bridge, i.e. to enable immediate 360's and a swift return to the 21st century.

You'll be welcome in Fife with maths like that

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I worked briefly, with a lad who told me he was a direct descendant of William Wallace AND Robert the Bruce.

I’ve also met 3 ex SAS, an ex Navy Seal and a guy who used to spar with Chuck Norris.  None of them looked like they’ve ever been in a fight in their lives. 

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32 minutes ago, Shotgun said:

I worked briefly, with a lad who told me he was a direct descendant of William Wallace AND Robert the Bruce.

Robert the Bruce died about 700 years ago. Allowing for 3 generations per century and an average of 2 children surviving to reproductive adulthood per generation, would mean there are currently about 2^21 (2,097,152) direct descendants of Robert the Bruce. 

Edited by Funky Nosejob

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I have a mate who is an utter fantasist. Amongst his wild claims are:

He invented the Rotastack but had the idea stolen from him at a trade fair

He has spent time in a Turkish prison

He was on a boat that capsized in the middle of the Atlantic

And various others.

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7 minutes ago, Gaz said:

 

He has spent time in a Turkish prison

 

Did he follow it up with this?

1866738064_ZhRk6bv(1).gif.e47ba05c4e08a0a905ff6194f4160993.gif

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6 minutes ago, virginton said:

Did he follow it up with this?

1866738064_ZhRk6bv(1).gif.e47ba05c4e08a0a905ff6194f4160993.gif

That's exactly how we got onto it! We were quoting Airplane quotes at each other one night and when we got to the Turkish prison quote he wellaxshuallyd us and gave us some utter ridiculous story.

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Being away for years, not remembering your password and coming back to find we're still shite at tournaments.  How is everyone?

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5 hours ago, The Doctor said:

Being away for years, not remembering your password and coming back to find we're still shite at tournaments.  How is everyone?

We’ve really missed you.  Not a week goes by without people asking “What happened to The Doctor”.  That invariably leads to a prolonged discussion about daleks and the space/time continuum and whether the Tardis is really feasible.

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5 hours ago, The Doctor said:

Being away for years, not remembering your password and coming back to find we're still shite at tournaments.  How is everyone?

I’ve got a big boil on my arse. Any chance you could take a look?

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BBC 5 live commentary not working on the red button meaning my ears are currently being subjected to Robbie Savage

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11 hours ago, deej said:

You'll be welcome in Fife with maths like that

180 would put you into oncoming traffic tbf

Edited by Boo Khaki

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8 hours ago, Gaz said:

I have a mate who is an utter fantasist. Amongst his wild claims are:

He invented the Rotastack but had the idea stolen from him at a trade fair

He has spent time in a Turkish prison

He was on a boat that capsized in the middle of the Atlantic

And various others.

Number 3 is true.

 

Sorry wrong thread.

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