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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

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It’s happened again. Yesterday. I’m waiting in a large queue at a Costa. I just want an Americano and a chocolate tiffin. Got a headache, and a bit of a squiffy stomach...need a sit down and a chocolatey thing to settle me down. In front of me, two women. Yakking away about fcuk-knows what. Strictly being flooded out of the Hydro last month or somesuch. Anyway, they’ve had over five minutes before reaching the lassie taking orders. The lassie then asks them what they want. Then it begins.... ‘Oh, I don’t know Sadie, do you fancy sharing a chocolate twist? No? Fancy the blueberry muffin? Nah? Your usual latte is it?’ Just. Fcuk. Off.
WTF is it with these women? It’s always women. Blokes in the queue are already lasered-in on their order, utilising the time spent in the queue to decide on the merits of a mocha over a flat white.
I’m a bawhair away from doing a Michael Douglas on these cnuts.
I assume it came as a complete surprise that they had to pay for their purchases and spent several minutes rummaging about their handbags to find a purse and additional minutes extracting the payment method from the purse? Whereas you had your money/card in your hand as you queued.

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1 minute ago, Arch Stanton said:
11 minutes ago, pozbaird said:
It’s happened again. Yesterday. I’m waiting in a large queue at a Costa. I just want an Americano and a chocolate tiffin. Got a headache, and a bit of a squiffy stomach...need a sit down and a chocolatey thing to settle me down. In front of me, two women. Yakking away about fcuk-knows what. Strictly being flooded out of the Hydro last month or somesuch. Anyway, they’ve had over five minutes before reaching the lassie taking orders. The lassie then asks them what they want. Then it begins.... ‘Oh, I don’t know Sadie, do you fancy sharing a chocolate twist? No? Fancy the blueberry muffin? Nah? Your usual latte is it?’ Just. Fcuk. Off.
WTF is it with these women? It’s always women. Blokes in the queue are already lasered-in on their order, utilising the time spent in the queue to decide on the merits of a mocha over a flat white.
I’m a bawhair away from doing a Michael Douglas on these cnuts.

I assume it came as a complete surprise that they had to pay for their purchases and spent several minutes rummaging about their handbags to find a purse and additional minutes extracting the payment method from the purse? Whereas you had your money/card in your hand as you queued.

I cannot say with any certainty. At that moment I was too busy head-butting the glass case that contains the chocolate twists.

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1 hour ago, pozbaird said:

It’s happened again. Yesterday. I’m waiting in a large queue at a Costa. I just want an Americano and a chocolate tiffin. Got a headache, and a bit of a squiffy stomach...need a sit down and a chocolatey thing to settle me down. In front of me, two women. Yakking away about fcuk-knows what. Strictly being flooded out of the Hydro last month or somesuch. Anyway, they’ve had over five minutes before reaching the lassie taking orders. The lassie then asks them what they want. Then it begins.... ‘Oh, I don’t know Sadie, do you fancy sharing a chocolate twist? No? Fancy the blueberry muffin? Nah? Your usual latte is it?’ Just. Fcuk. Off.

WTF is it with these women? It’s always women. Blokes in the queue are already lasered-in on their order, utilising the time spent in the queue to decide on the merits of a mocha over a flat white.

I’m a bawhair away from doing a Michael Douglas on these cnuts.

Don't go to coffee shops then.

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1 hour ago, pozbaird said:

I cannot say with any certainty. At that moment I was too busy head-butting the glass case that contains the chocolate twists.

You need to slow down, stop wanting every too fast.  No need to rush your life, the devil will  wait. When it's your time, he'll be ready.

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I'm in temporary accomodation right now and the microwave with some french sounding name doesnt even have the wattage on it, and it doesnt help that most microwavable food looks that unedible that its hard to tell if its cooked right or not. Probably best i buy and temperature probe
Check underneath there must be a sticker or something?

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Idiot drivers who think their headlights are only for them to be able to see.

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On 12/02/2020 at 01:44, engelbert_humperdink said:

I'm in temporary accomodation right now and the microwave with some french sounding name doesnt even have the wattage on it, and it doesnt help that most microwavable food looks that unedible that its hard to tell if its cooked right or not. Probably best i buy and temperature probe

^^^

553058794.jpg

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On 12/02/2020 at 01:44, engelbert_humperdink said:

I'm in temporary accomodation right now and the microwave with some french sounding name doesnt even have the wattage on it, and it doesnt help that most microwavable food looks that unedible that its hard to tell if its cooked right or not. Probably best i buy and temperature probe

Or just google the French sounding name.

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The most petty irritation for me in a coffee shop is that I ask for a black Americano and they ask if I'd like milk in it. Is there black milk which I've not been aware of?

Second place is asking for a small and they say "tall?". This hasn't happened since I stopped visiting Starbucks come to think of it. Must just be them. 

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Do you know of a poster who uses this emoji on here?

From The Daily Mash -

No one who uses 'tears of joy' emoji worth knowing

14th February 2020

tears-of-joy-laughter-emoji-emoticon-2.j

ANYONE who uses the ‘tears of joy’ emoji is not worth your time or attention, experts have confirmed.

The Institute for Studies found the emoticon is exclusively used by simpletons, sarcastic morons and people who post things on the internet for the sake of it.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Just look at its stupid chuckling face. If you use it in any form of communication, either ironically or not, you don’t deserve to draw breath.

“Traditionally this little yellow fool has been a favourite with passive-aggressive mums on WhatsApp and middle-aged blokes with Union Jacks in their Twitter bios. Do you really want to be like them?

“It’s unlikely that they’re actually crying with laughter, as 80 per of its use is criticising someone who disagrees with them. 

 

“Maybe some really are hooting uncontrollably at a gif of a toddler looking confused. Who knows with these idiots? Cut them out of your life immediately.”

Tears of joy user Tom Booker texted ‘Tell us how you really feel mate!’, followed by the emoji 15 times, as if that was clever.

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3 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

Don't go to coffee shops then.

Damn good advice. That’s me done with them. 😀

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3 hours ago, SlipperyP said:

You need to slow down, stop wanting every too fast.  No need to rush your life, the devil will  wait. When it's your time, he'll be ready.

More good advice, but fcuk it - when I want a chocolate tiffin, I want it now. Not after five minutes while Elaine C Smith and Isa fae’ ‘Still Game’ types fanny around deciding if they want to share a blueberry muffin or not. Fcuk um’. 😀

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10 minutes ago, pozbaird said:

Damn good advice. That’s me done with them. 😀

Stick with me, you won't go far wrong.

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2 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

Le Hot Point. 

If it says "Puissance 700/800/900 puis vous est bonne a aller

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Do you know of a poster who uses this emoji on here?
From The Daily Mash -

No one who uses 'tears of joy' emoji worth knowing

14th February 2020
tears-of-joy-laughter-emoji-emoticon-2.jpg&key=d8379f8ffb59b6eb9e1dd5773637ee6c3731262f26d98dc9f566fa85d3159774 ANYONE who uses the ‘tears of joy’ emoji is not worth your time or attention, experts have confirmed.
The Institute for Studies found the emoticon is exclusively used by simpletons, sarcastic morons and people who post things on the internet for the sake of it.
Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Just look at its stupid chuckling face. If you use it in any form of communication, either ironically or not, you don’t deserve to draw breath.
“Traditionally this little yellow fool has been a favourite with passive-aggressive mums on WhatsApp and middle-aged blokes with Union Jacks in their Twitter bios. Do you really want to be like them?
“It’s unlikely that they’re actually crying with laughter, as 80 per of its use is criticising someone who disagrees with them. 
  “Maybe some really are hooting uncontrollably at a gif of a toddler looking confused. Who knows with these idiots? Cut them out of your life immediately.”
Tears of joy user Tom Booker texted ‘Tell us how you really feel mate!’, followed by the emoji 15 times, as if that was clever.
...

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6 hours ago, pozbaird said:

It’s happened again. Yesterday. I’m waiting in a large queue at a Costa. I just want an Americano and a chocolate tiffin. Got a headache, and a bit of a squiffy stomach...need a sit down and a chocolatey thing to settle me down. In front of me, two women. Yakking away about fcuk-knows what. Strictly being flooded out of the Hydro last month or somesuch. Anyway, they’ve had over five minutes before reaching the lassie taking orders. The lassie then asks them what they want. Then it begins.... ‘Oh, I don’t know Sadie, do you fancy sharing a chocolate twist? No? Fancy the blueberry muffin? Nah? Your usual latte is it?’ Just. Fcuk. Off.

WTF is it with these women? It’s always women. Blokes in the queue are already lasered-in on their order, utilising the time spent in the queue to decide on the merits of a mocha over a flat white.

I’m a bawhair away from doing a Michael Douglas on these cnuts.

I hear you fella: 

 

On 02/08/2019 at 15:48, KingRocketman II said:

that doesn't bother me too much. However folks waiting for 10 min for so in a fairly long queue, gabbing to one another incessantly and then when its their turn say "oh I don't know what I'll have today. Is the Costa Rican roast on this week?" or something to that effect. Boils my piss. You should know exactly what you want and be saying it within a fraction of a second of the word "next". Fuckin die. 

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Recently changed banks from TSB to HSBC. Everything is better with HSBC in my experience so far, except one crucial, annoying thing - They don't update the balance of your bank account instantly like I'm used to with TSB. There's around a 2 day delay so I'm never 100% sure just how much  cash I have and HSBC doesn't update their 'pending transactions' either.

I know I can easily just keep track of my outgoings manually, but it's a slight pisser when logging onto the TSB app and you'd get the correct details instantly.

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1 hour ago, Ludo*1 said:

Recently changed banks from TSB to HSBC. Everything is better with HSBC in my experience so far, except one crucial, annoying thing - They don't update the balance of your bank account instantly like I'm used to with TSB. There's around a 2 day delay so I'm never 100% sure just how much  cash I have and HSBC doesn't update their 'pending transactions' either.

I know I can easily just keep track of my outgoings manually, but it's a slight pisser when logging onto the TSB app and you'd get the correct details instantly.

Banking regulations state that banks have to show you your up to date balance with any pending transactions taken off. I'd get in the phone to them because that doesn't sound right at all.

Edited by Bert Raccoon

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