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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

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That's like 'Merrimass' in Irvine every August - a local holiday whose true meaning remains a mystery, but that provides ample opportunity for the locals to reflect on, as they are battered, stabbed or assaulted with Buckfast bottles. :rolleyes:

Thats not far from the truth :lol: the "market fowk" always frequent the local nitespots, thats where most of the trouble stems from. Last year a midget asked my mate's girl for a dance and she refused, so he booted her in the shin :lol: i think his name was dave.....

Edited by philpy

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What's a plamf?? :unsure:

And i got it ya big moanin faced jessie :P

You should know what a plamf is what with it being a 'weegie' term and you being one! :P

*Woof! Woof!* "Oh, you're such a licky boy, mmmmmmm" :lol:

:lol:

I was at a rendering plant last week in Irvine, shocking what they do to horses :(

Give them boots and directions to Somerset? :unsure:

Thats not far from the truth :lol: the "market fowk" always frequent the local nitespots, thats where most of the trouble stems from. Last year a dwarf asked my mate's girl for a dance and she refused, so he booted her in the shin :lol: i think his name was dave.....

:lol::lol::lol:

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Thats not far from the truth :lol: the "market fowk" always frequent the local nitespots, thats where most of the trouble stems from. Last year a dwarf asked my mate's girl for a dance and she refused, so he booted her in the shin :lol: i think his name was dave.....

I am bookmarking this! The first time this plank has EVER said anything remotely funny! :D

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I am bookmarking this! The first time this plank has EVER said anything remotely funny! :D

Most of what he says just goes over your head anyway. Oh, wait...... :ph34r:

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f**k, thats just minded me. "The ned's paradise" aka the kirkcaldy links market rolls into town next week. :angry:

Do the local kids still go down on a Tuesdya night to 'test' the rides ?

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You should know what a plamf is what with it being a 'weegie' term and you being one! :P

*Woof! Woof!* "Oh, you're such a licky boy, mmmmmmm" :lol:

She's a bitch :ph34r: Monster, not a Stud/dog/boy dog*

* whatever the technical term for is for a male dog

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Do the local kids still go down on a Tuesdya night to 'test' the rides ?

I think so :lol: , mind it you it is the links so your always guaranteed a ride down there......

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Just a wee bit too obvious, big man!

I'm trying to draw you out, because frankly young man you're far too nice.

I mean, all these sly, obvious and mostly humourless digs about your height(which isn't your fault) and never once have you responded with a joke about my not inconsiderable mass(which clearly is my fault).

Dave, it's just not pie and bovril if you aint a keyboard gangster. ;)

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I'm trying to draw you out, because frankly young man you're far too nice.

I mean, all these sly, obvious and mostly humourless digs about your height(which isn't your fault) and never once have you responded with a joke about my not inconsiderable mass(which clearly is my fault).

Dave, it's just not pie and bovril if you aint a keyboard gangster. ;)

Leave him alone you , ya big, fat ba................. i'l stop there i think :lol:

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I'm trying to draw you out, because frankly young man you're far too nice.

I mean, all these sly, obvious and mostly humourless digs about your height(which isn't your fault) and never once have you responded with a joke about my not inconsiderable mass(which clearly is my fault).

Dave, it's just not pie and bovril if you aint a keyboard gangster. ;)

I'm sorry you fat bassa.

Post your seat number :angry:

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Leave him alone you , ya big, fat ba.................

..............................stard

here to help :lol:

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I'm sorry you fat bassa.

Post your seat number :angry:

That's more like it, except it's not really a number, more third pillar from left, 2/3 of way up from right hand goalpost, Somerset Road end. Can't miss me. Literally - I take up the whole end. :)

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That's more like it, except it's not really a number, more third pillar from left, 2/3 of way up from right hand goalpost, Somerset Road end. Can't miss me. Literally - I take up the whole end. :)

So dave would be like a tasty snack for you then in between the pie and the bovril, like a sausage on a stick type of thing......

Edited by Bowie_1888

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That's more like it, except it's not really a number, more third pillar from left, 2/3 of way up from right hand goalpost, Somerset Road end. Can't miss me. Literally - I take up the whole end. :)

Christ, this keyboard gangster malarkeys complicated...

Post the postcode of your left arse cheek :angry:

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Christ, this keyboard gangster malarkeys complicated...

Post the postcode of your left arse cheek :angry:

Errr...which one? I think it has three. Four when I bend down. :(

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Monster, get along to the five's' this year and sort the c**t oot! mind you it would be like david and goliath (literally)

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Monster, get along to the five's' this year and sort the c**t oot! mind you it would be like david and goliath (literally)

Let's make it a threesome, Daves a good guy, I'm bad. You can be the ugly. ;)

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