Lisa Cuddy Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Amazingly I was only the second drunkest person there last night. I think we were all quite far gone. That's not what I heard. See that fucking ice? My arse hurts! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Kevin Of Kilsyth Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 That's not what I heard. See that fucking ice? My arse hurts! Aye it looked a sore yin lol. I nearly done it myself a few times but thankfully I wore sensible shoes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Cuddy Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Aye it looked a sore yin lol. I nearly done it myself a few times but thankfully I wore sensible shoes. Which time? After the last one, I just couldn't be arsed getting up again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bibby Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Santy Clause obviously slipped a brand new shiny camera under The Phoenix's tree this year. Anyways, apparently there's a safety issue at the Cineworld at Fountain Park, so we're having to settle for the Odeon in Dunflemmin. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cynical Saintee Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Argh, I STILL have loose teeth that refuse to fall out, and hurt like buggery when I bite anything. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Santy Clause obviously slipped a brand new shiny camera under The Phoenix's tree this year. If only, they're the product of a four year old Fujifilm F470. The Rolls is brand new and shiny. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Scorpio Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Holy shitting fuck, i'm bored out my face. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Holy shitting fuck, i'm bored out my face. Hours of fun... (allegedly) Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your money to urban75.com'?) See how long you can hold a note (Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes) Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an amusing note. Try to not think about penguins (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway. Use your secret mind power (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out. Pretend you're a robot (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) Walk down the street with mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion. Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at least 30 seconds more entertainment. Scratch yourself (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good? Rate passers by (Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes) Secretly award passers by marks out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices. Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises. Pinch yourself (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain. Try to swallow your tongue (Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes) There's not much to say about this one. It is possible, but really stupid. Pretend to be a car (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity. Make Star Trek door noises (Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes) Stand by an electric door to a bank or something and make that silly "Scccccccchwop" sound heard whenever people popped on to the bridge to hang with Captain Kirk. Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image (Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes) Another great time waster. It takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine this one with pushing on your eyes. Get yourself as nauseated as possible (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better" effect (see "Hurt Yourself"). Invent a weird twitch (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Adopt a bizarre twitch (e.g. flicking your head irregularly, twitching with eye or busting out sporadic cough noises) and try it out when you go shopping. Make a low buzzing noise (Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes) Hours of fun in libraries! Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch humming/buzzing noise and see who reacts. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cynical Saintee Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Pretend to be a car(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Scorpio Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 (edited) That story with the guy who went to China with the heroin in his suitcase and got caught has made me very fucking angry. What a pathetic shambles of a country. Is drug smuggling really a crime worth taking a life!?! I cannae even put into words how fucking shocking this is. China should be fucking ASHAMED of themselves. Edited December 28, 2009 by Alex Turner 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Silly people who won't accept "no" as an answer. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Silly people who won't accept "no" as an answer. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 If only, they're the product of a four year old Fujifilm F470. Don't worry, I can't stand camera snobs either. The Herald has a daily reader's picture's bit in the letters page. Today's was a beautiful shot of Castle Campbell in Dollar Glen, Clackmannanshire, spoilt only by the following smugness: I took this on my Canon EOS 5D Mark II and an 85mm 1.2L lens set at f8.0 at 1/20 sec, ISO 50 for maximum detail. I used a tripod, locked the mirror up and used a remote trigger to eliminate vibration. A Lee 0.6ND graduated filter was used to hold back the horizon. I then adjusted curves, tones and colours using Adobe Lightroom. Anyone who knows me will understand I couldn't have made that boastful tosh up. My limit is pointing whatever it is in the right direction and pressing the button. Even doing that the other night, I managed to press the wrong button (or the right button on the wrong setting) and took a video clip instead of a picture! The ones I did manage to take come out really well though! Hours of fun... (allegedly)Try to not think about penguins (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway. Well thank you! That's buggered my evening up..... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawain1 Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 I keep washing myself but I always smell like shit 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Arch Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Sky Sports News are showing the Championship highlights and when Graeme Dorrans scored they said: "Dorrans, scoring his sixth goal since joining from Partick in July". There's really so much wrong with it. 1. We've never owned him. 2. He hasn't played for us since early 2006. 3. They signed him from Livi 4. He played for them in the Premiership last season, so they certainly didn't sign him in July. It was a good goal though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam_Wee Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 That story with the guy who went to China with the heroin in his suitcase and got caught has made me very fucking angry. What a pathetic shambles of a country.Is drug smuggling really a crime worth taking a life!?! I cannae even put into words how fucking shocking this is. China should be fucking ASHAMED of themselves. Given that he is a bit of a special as well makes it even more wrong. I can't see him getting executed though. China has a history of giving last minute stays in death penalty cases. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkBlue62 Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Pain and lots of it! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Scorpio Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Given that he is a bit of a special as well makes it even more wrong. I can't see him getting executed though. China has a history of giving last minute stays in death penalty cases. I really, really hope he doesn't. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 I have just finished supper, which was a very tasty pasta/veggie bake. However, I now have the distinct feeling I have eaten FAR too many sprouts... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 I have just finished supper, which was a very tasty pasta/veggie bake.However, I now have the distinct feeling I have eaten FAR too many sprouts... Do you ever eat any real food? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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