wearealldoomed Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 The Morrison's story reminds me of a wee incident in the Tuttie's Neuk at Gayfield a few years back. Having been refused service on accound of being shitfaced, I truned round, informed my mate of the situation then handed him money to buy the round. My mate then ordered two pints from the very same barmaid, who saw right though our cunning plan and refused to serve him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Stuart. Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Pollok 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
staggy4life Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Pollok What did the fish ever do to you? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudge Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 What did the fish ever do to you? That would be Pollock The fact that it takes 3-5 days for gambling rights to return your winnings 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capybara Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Hibs 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saints1884 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 But we are men! If we just want beer, we walk into shop, grab crates of beer, walk to checkout,put beer down. All in a manly way. We've all done it at some point. Of course, if something else interesting catches your eye, then you have a struggle, but that doesn't matter, for we are men! So you would rather struggle with the beer than put them into a trolly or a basket....Whatever floats your boat. They were on offer, so they were right in front of the checkout. There were two of you. You work it out. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raith Against The Machine Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 The good quality, proper Indian restaurant/takeaway in Dalgety Bay has shut down, while the shitey kebabhouse is still carrying on pushing out shite food to drunk folk, paying its illegal workers a pittance. There's just no justice. Not that I'm going to stop going mad in the other one when I'm pished. Mmm Munchybox! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ade Eyemond Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 The Morrison's story reminds me of a wee incident in the Tuttie's Neuk at Gayfield a few years back.Having been refused service on accound of being shitfaced, I truned round, informed my mate of the situation then handed him money to buy the round. My mate then ordered two pints from the very same barmaid, who saw right though our cunning plan and refused to serve him. Damn that rum ! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squiggles92 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 I don't rate the c**t enough to see him off as important, but Alan Hansen has a thing for getting on my tits. As does Mark Lawerenson. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xbl Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 (edited) I just watched a film called Eden Lake . its the first time I've actually been properly unsettled by a film. It was amazing, but man its made me look at neds in a new way. Feart to sleep now. Edited March 14, 2009 by xbl 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 (edited) Forcing myself to make conversation with someone. It's probably best I don't even give them the time of day for my own sanity, but oh well. Oh, and my kitchen sink is blocked. Edited March 14, 2009 by breakingdecency 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squiggles92 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 When the weather bad and sky's acting the fool! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 When the weather bad and sky's acting the fool! The sky is Ludacris! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Dufresne Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Don't ever ever ever buy a Rover car,It has cost me £210 to get my car fixed and all that was wrong with it was a broken wire coming out from the ECU. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McMuffin Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 So. There I was. Taken a lassie back to my flat. I'll be honest, not my finest. Infact, given my low number and relatively high standard, it'd have been one for the "Ugliest birds..." thread. Unreal body, not so great in the chops. A proper get in, get out, get her out job. Nevertheless, we got down to business. Clothes on the floor, she's as wet as an otter's pocket and the wee man is standing to attention and is being tugged like a dry well in Ethiopia. Good times, thinks McMuffin. Port. Storm. "Give me a second." *Reaches for the bedside table* "I'm sorry." "Whit?" "I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend." "WHIT?" The game was over quicker than a Ryu Hadouken to finish. Why, oh why, could you not have given me this fairly important information when I started cracking onto you 3 hours ago, or when you were rubbing your arse against my thigh as if Shere Khan was about and you needed man's red flower for protection? And the worst thing? Despite being fucked around (or not as it happens), being a nice chap I walked her to a taxi. Being Glasgow at 2.45am, we had to walk all the way to fucking Central. So not only did I not get laid, I got cold aswell. I'm curiously mad and relieved at once. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikingTON Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 I fell over my arse in Tesco garage and have been rewarded with a 'fashion' rip in my best jeans. Not to mention the mirth of ScuoboMuff etc... Just knee'd myself in the face while typing this, time for bed... -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
staggy4life Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 And the worst thing? Despite being fucked around (or not as it happens), being a nice chap I walked her to a taxi. Being Glasgow at 2.45am, we had to walk all the way to fucking Central. So not only did I not get laid, I got cold aswell. at the story plus you walked from the strath flats to Central and back? What a genitle man. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Why, oh why, could you not have given me this fairly important information when I started cracking onto you 3 hours ago, or when you were rubbing your arse against my thigh as if Shere Khan was about and you needed man's red flower for protection? This is maybe the single most greatest thing I have ever read. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gav-ffc Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Aftershock hangover. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Scorpio Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Joining my current team was a total mistake and i'll be looking to get my contract terminated soon. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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