Melanius Mullarkey Posted January 6, 2022 Share Posted January 6, 2022 14 minutes ago, Zen Archer (Raconteur) said: Just get her to scrape it off her knickers. I’ll need to get round to ToolStation to hire an angle grinder first. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 8 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkay said: That’s the wife received her first “shit in a box” pack from the NHS and she’s currently giving me the step by step instructions. Is this a new one on Just Eat? 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 11 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said: She might not be due to change them. If only it had arrived BEFORE the New Year... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 12 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkay said: That’s the wife received her first “shit in a box” pack from the NHS and she’s currently giving me the step by step instructions. I remember a letter in Viz asking how it was okay to send stool samples to the NHS, yet when he sent a turd in a box to Downing Street he got done. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 12 hours ago, welshbairn said: If you don't want that to happen again, give them a safe place or neighbour to leave it with if you're not in. They get paid per parcel, not by how many times they try to deliver it when you're out. Was due to have a returned parcel picked up yesterday by "your DPD driver Roy" from your "safe place" (my green bin immediately behind the property). Got a text whilst at work around midday to say "sorry we missed you". I thought maybe someone might have seen me putting the parcel in the bin at 03.00 and nicked it. Got home and parcel still in the bin where it had been left. Seems Roy never read the instructions and just knocked the door, left his wee card when i didn't answer, then f**ked off. They can now f**kin' well wait till it's convenient for me to be in to get it back, unless they start employing drivers who can read and understand basic instructions. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 (edited) Had to go to immigration today so went to the local McDonald's after to get a Big Mac for my son. They had no burgers of any description available, or fries - only chicken and rice. FFS, If I wanted chicken and rice I'd have gone to KFC. Me when the server told me - Edit to Add - I'd forgotten about this but last Sunday in Burger King they had no fries, and were substituting onion rings. That was a result so should really have posted in PTTDGOYN thread. Edited January 7, 2022 by hk blues 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 We went to an Arby's in Phoenix years ago, only to be told they were out of beef, so we asked for a portion of their famous curly fries, but they were out of those too. Literally all Arby's sell is roast beef sandwiches, curly fries, and drinks. Unless they were expecting to make a bomb out of the soda fountain, I'd have thought that sending the (what looked like a full compliment of) staff home and shutting for the day made more sense than having everyone hang around kicking their heels! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 People.I get the dog's biscuits from a petrol station near me. I always load them into the car then go and pay for them. As I was loading up, a woman walked past me so could clearly see that's all I was there for. Stood behind her in the queue and someone was being served in front of us. Then it's her turn. Rather than say "Is that all you're buying?" and let me on my way she instead goes to the counter and asks for 4 lots of hot pick numbers for the lottery. And on different lines. It was 10 lines in total and this seems to take an age to process. After that she fannies about and asks for paracetamol and pays for the petrol she got as well. What should have been a minute's transaction for me took over 10 minutes. It was the equivalent of someone with a trolly full not letting someone go ahead of them with one item. Absolute arsehole behaviour. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empty It Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 People.I get the dog's biscuits from a petrol station near me. I always load them into the car then go and pay for them. As I was loading up, a woman walked past me so could clearly see that's all I was there for. Stood behind her in the queue and someone was being served in front of us. Then it's her turn. Rather than say "Is that all you're buying?" and let me on my way she instead goes to the counter and asks for 4 lots of hot pick numbers for the lottery. And on different lines. It was 10 lines in total and this seems to take an age to process. After that she fannies about and asks for paracetamol and pays for the petrol she got as well. What should have been a minute's transaction for me took over 10 minutes. It was the equivalent of someone with a trolly full not letting someone go ahead of them with one item. Absolute arsehole behaviour. These people are the worst, generally older folk at the busiest time of the day for the shop. The classic handing over 15 tickets and asking "can you check these for me?". Check them yourself instead of holding everyone up for 20 minutes you ignorant c***s. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AsimButtHitsASix Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 I wouldn't say it's something that gets on my nerves but it's been noticeable and along the same lines... ..I nip into the petrol station on the walk to work to grab an energy drink if I'm still half asleep at that point and it's almost always workies in at that time filling up the van before work for the day. The odd one here and there grabs an energy drink and coffee with it but, about half of them, will buy about half a dozen scratch cards as well. I used to be a labourer for a while and don't remember tradies all spending £20 a day on lucky dips. Although a decent number spent that on fags, rolls and IRN BRU. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 16 hours ago, Stellaboz said: We brought home a tin of Celebrations on the 2nd January. We're now almost at the point where it's only Milkybar and Mars left. We were given a box of Celebrations by an elderly neighbour. It was at least 75% Bounty. I used to think the old cow liked us. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 6 minutes ago, Empty It said: These people are the worst, generally older folk at the busiest time of the day for the shop. The classic handing over 15 tickets and asking "can you check these for me?". Check them yourself instead of holding everyone up for 20 minutes you ignorant c***s. That used to infuriate me when I worked in a corner shop. Just the height of entitled laziness. I got the impression some had already checked them, but wanted someone else to give them a different answer. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 13 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said: People. I get the dog's biscuits from a petrol station near me. I always load them into the car then go and pay for them. As I was loading up, a woman walked past me so could clearly see that's all I was there for. Stood behind her in the queue and someone was being served in front of us. Then it's her turn. Rather than say "Is that all you're buying?" and let me on my way she instead goes to the counter and asks for 4 lots of hot pick numbers for the lottery. And on different lines. It was 10 lines in total and this seems to take an age to process. After that she fannies about and asks for paracetamol and pays for the petrol she got as well. What should have been a minute's transaction for me took over 10 minutes. It was the equivalent of someone with a trolly full not letting someone go ahead of them with one item. Absolute arsehole behaviour. 9 minutes ago, Empty It said: 13 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said: People. I get the dog's biscuits from a petrol station near me. I always load them into the car then go and pay for them. As I was loading up, a woman walked past me so could clearly see that's all I was there for. Stood behind her in the queue and someone was being served in front of us. Then it's her turn. Rather than say "Is that all you're buying?" and let me on my way she instead goes to the counter and asks for 4 lots of hot pick numbers for the lottery. And on different lines. It was 10 lines in total and this seems to take an age to process. After that she fannies about and asks for paracetamol and pays for the petrol she got as well. What should have been a minute's transaction for me took over 10 minutes. It was the equivalent of someone with a trolly full not letting someone go ahead of them with one item. Absolute arsehole behaviour. These people are the worst, generally older folk at the busiest time of the day for the shop. The classic handing over 15 tickets and asking "can you check these for me?". Check them yourself instead of holding everyone up for 20 minutes you ignorant c***s. You guys wouldn't make it through a day where I am. Nobody gives a f**k about keeping folk waiting and nobody gives a f**k about being kept waiting! The concept of letting folk go first is absolutely not a thing. Too many examples to give but a favourite of mine is 2 pals waiting in different lines in a fast food place and then one jumping over to the other line when it's clear it's getting served faster. Absolute C****. Another is folk who complete most of their shopping then get their trolley in the queue and then finish the rest of their shopping. Nobody ever goes in front and you can often see a trolley then a fairly big gap in front. More C****. Today's example - I was at immigration so was killing time by looking around, there was an ATM and a woman had about 25 cards (no joke) and was doing a different transaction on each (she was a debt collector - they keep the ATM cards of their customers and withdraw the money directly - more C****). There was a fairly sizable queue behind her as you can imagine. No fucks given by her or the folk in the queue. I was way angrier than them t.b.h. Problem is when you do the obvious and stand up to such dickishness you are the one in the wrong here, they just don't see it as a problem. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 35 minutes ago, hk blues said: - I was at immigration so was killing time by looking around, there was an ATM and a woman had about 25 cards (no joke) and was doing a different transaction on each (she was a debt collector - they keep the ATM cards of their customers and withdraw the money directly - more C****). There was a fairly sizable queue behind her as you can imagine. No fucks given by her or the folk in the queue. I was way angrier than them t.b.h. Presumably she’ll pop up in an episode of Australian Border Control in the next few weeks. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 1 hour ago, Mark Connolly said: We were given a box of Celebrations by an elderly neighbour. It was at least 75% Bounty. When I get elected doG, coconut will be one of the first things to go. When I was a kid and someone handed round a box of chocolates, I always, always, always seemed to get the fucking coconut one. It's the devil's dandruff. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 You guys wouldn't make it through a day where I am. Nobody gives a f**k about keeping folk waiting and nobody gives a f**k about being kept waiting! The concept of letting folk go first is absolutely not a thing. Too many examples to give but a favourite of mine is 2 pals waiting in different lines in a fast food place and then one jumping over to the other line when it's clear it's getting served faster. Absolute C****. Another is folk who complete most of their shopping then get their trolley in the queue and then finish the rest of their shopping. Nobody ever goes in front and you can often see a trolley then a fairly big gap in front. More C****. Today's example - I was at immigration so was killing time by looking around, there was an ATM and a woman had about 25 cards (no joke) and was doing a different transaction on each (she was a debt collector - they keep the ATM cards of their customers and withdraw the money directly - more C****). There was a fairly sizable queue behind her as you can imagine. No fucks given by her or the folk in the queue. I was way angrier than them t.b.h. Problem is when you do the obvious and stand up to such dickishness you are the one in the wrong here, they just don't see it as a problem.That is absolutely wild. My gf has been selling loads of old clothes on eBay for the last 6 months or so, and regularly asks me to nip round to the post office on my lunch to send them. On Wednesday she asked me to take nine parcels to the post office, as the auctions had built up over the festive period when it was shut. I was pretty mortified, thinking about how fuming the people behind me would be. Therefore, I posted five parcels at one post office, and drove half a mile to go to a second one.Wish I didn’t give a f**k what people thought. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 I don’t get nose bleeds very often but when I do I get them a few days in a row , I had one yesterday after playing on a trampoline and one today and it lasted for about an hour and I probably lost about a litre of blood. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 You can all send me your coconut chocolate treats, you ungrateful heathens. 7 minutes ago, Adam said: That is absolutely wild. My gf has been selling loads of old clothes on eBay for the last 6 months or so, and regularly asks me to nip round to the post office on my lunch to send them. On Wednesday she asked me to take nine parcels to the post office, as the auctions had built up over the festive period when it was shut. I was pretty mortified, thinking about how fuming the people behind me would be. Therefore, I posted five parcels at one post office, and drove half a mile to go to a second one. Wish I didn’t give a f**k what people thought. If she's printed out the labels and postage, it should only take about as long to get the receipts as it does for the pensioners to cash their giro*. If she's making you hang about weighing parcels and getting the postmaster to sort the postage out, get her telt. Abhorrent behaviour. Bet she hangs about at the counter filling out customs labels too, the wretch. * yes, I am aware. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 1 minute ago, BFTD said: You can all send me your coconut chocolate treats, you ungrateful heathens. Your deviancy gets worse and worse. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 5 minutes ago, throbber said: I don’t get nose bleeds very often but when I do I get them a few days in a row , I had one yesterday after playing on a trampoline and one today and it lasted for about an hour and I probably lost about a litre of blood. The best things about your stories are the little incidentals that you casually breeze past. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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