gannonball Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 (edited) 10 hours ago, Flybhoy said: This all day long. On a more amusing note, a guy I know from Stirling told me there was a warrant out for his arrest once, think he'd been in a bit of bother quite regularly so knew the protocol, went to stay with a mate at the weekend and, on the advice of his lawyer handed himself into Randolphield, the police station in Stirling about 6.00 on the Monday, with the tactical move of taking two of his mums strong sleeping pills about half an hour before he went up so as he could basically snore his way through his night in the cells. Rocks up at the cop shop only to be told that the cells at Stirling police station are no longer in use, haven't been for a month or so and all the custody detainees are taken to Falkirk now before being transferred to court in the morning, only a few clerical staff in Stirling at that time so he will need to come back on the Tuesday. On his walk home to the Raploch about two miles away the heavy duty sleeping pills kicked in and, for those familiar with Stirling, by the time he got to the old cinema at Allan Park, he could barely stand up and was literally down on all fours, drawing all sorts of appalled looks from people leaving work thinking he was a jakey pished at teatime on a Monday. My pal who often used to frequent the cells in Stirling at the weekend had a similar situation where he got lifted but taken to Alloa cells instead. After being let out he realised he wasn't in Stirling and also had no top on him from the nights endeavours so walked down to the Tesco Extra to get one but the security guard wouldn't let him in for that reason. Tried to explain to the security guard that he was going in to buy one and he still said no. He then asked him if he could buy one for him offering cash but the jobsworth still refused. My pal still somewhat inebriated took umbrage with said jobsworth and proceeded to scrap with him and was lifted again about half an hour after being released and taken back to the cells up the road. Edited March 10, 2023 by gannonball 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 @Hoose Ricewent to hand himself in. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 11 hours ago, Miguel Sanchez said: I'm just posting in here so I can be part of history when P&B is read out in court. "Your honour, I would like to be excused from jury duty as I once gave the defendant a green dot on the P&B Deadpool thread" 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ParsJake Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Thoughts and prayers etc etc... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 13 hours ago, ICTChris said: I assume that you aren’t up in court for armed robbery or murder or anything like that. If so, hand yourself in or take a private jet to Northern Cyprus. 13 hours ago, Hoose Rice said: Nah - a charge that was actually 3 years back thats dragged on because of covid. If it is High Treason, there is a good chance the new king will offer clemency. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 1 hour ago, Mark Connolly said: "Your honour, I would like to be excused from jury duty as I once gave the defendant a green dot on the P&B Deadpool thread" Hopefully his Excellent reputation on P&B will taken into consideration. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 1 hour ago, gannonball said: My pal 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Does your maw have a spare twelve million quid? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamamafegan Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 15 hours ago, Hoose Rice said: Nah - a charge that was actually 3 years back thats dragged on because of covid. That's a bit shite. I take it they just kept extending your appearance? I've a couple of mates who got off due to covid. The police must have forgot about then through their system. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty dingus Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Hoose Rice, that your full name boy? We've got one here Will. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 8 hours ago, TxRover said: Not to be cynical, but perhaps hiding in the River Wyre is the best choice to be missed by the police? Lying in a car beside the hard shoulder of the M9 is probably handier. I believe Police Scotland's response rate is three days there. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TxRover Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 3 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: Lying in a car beside the hard shoulder of the M9 is probably handier. I believe Police Scotland's response rate is three days there. Noted, but remember, if the fuzz find you…as Chris Rock warned, if the cops have to chase you, they’re bringing an ass-kicking with them. Don’t think it’s applicable, but always worth a watch… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uj0mtxXEGE8 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoose Rice Posted March 10, 2023 Author Share Posted March 10, 2023 Och well: Good afternoon, A warrant has been issued to the Police in relation to the above case due to your failure to appear at Edinburgh Sheriff Court on 8 March 2023. If you wish for the matter to be dealt with quickly please hand yourself into the Police at your earliest convenience. Kind regards, Edinburgh PFO 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Go in on Sunday night 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
budmiester1 Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 5 minutes ago, Hoose Rice said: Och well: Good afternoon, A warrant has been issued to the Police in relation to the above case due to your failure to appear at Edinburgh Sheriff Court on 8 March 2023. If you wish for the matter to be dealt with quickly please hand yourself into the Police at your earliest convenience. Kind regards, Edinburgh PFO Ah well, it looks like plan B then Hoose, lie low until Monday then arrange to go in on Monday night but no later than 1am, best of luck and hopefully everything goes smoothly for you 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
budmiester1 Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 2 minutes ago, Derry Alli said: Go in on Sunday night Derry, not a good idea, most custody suites are full on a Sunday and the courts are usually full on a Monday. Best to go in on Monday night. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoose Rice Posted March 10, 2023 Author Share Posted March 10, 2023 2 minutes ago, budmiester1 said: Ah well, it looks like plan B then Hoose, lie low until Monday then arrange to go in on Monday night but no later than 1am, best of luck and hopefully everything goes smoothly for you Yeah mate exactly that. Cheers again 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Blades Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 11 minutes ago, Hoose Rice said: Och well: Good afternoon, A warrant has been issued to the Police in relation to the above case due to your failure to appear at Edinburgh Sheriff Court on 8 March 2023. If you wish for the matter to be dealt with quickly please hand yourself into the Police at your earliest convenience. Kind regards, Edinburgh PFO Hide under your bed. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Inform them it will be convenient in about 20 years time 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.