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18 hours ago, pub car king said:

Just woke up to the highlights on the news. All this and they've still not planted her. 

Will there be a family only do where they show a Christmas video of her shit faced falling into the tree and having a tear stained rant. 

Half-expecting King Chuckles 1/3rd to be accompanied by his maw's coffin, standing vertically beside him, when he turns up to do his Xmas Message.

A modern-day Iron Maiden.

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2 hours ago, cyderspaceman said:

Headline in the Telegraph

"Energy usage plunges as Britain stops in its tracks to watch the Queen’s funeral"

So, bury a monarch every day, energy crisis over.

Conversely it surged in my street...seemed like everybody chose yesterday to cut their grass for some reason, myself included.

In other news, claims that 5.1 billion watched the thing yesterday, which is actually comfortably more than the figure of all the people in the world who actually have access to television.

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14 hours ago, Cptn Hooch said:

My daughter asked why the queen was getting buried again tonight....the wife wasn't too happy when I told her it was just the highlights and Gary Lineker would be on in a minute to discuss it

Hate to be the one to tell you but there's a fair bit of pooping involved in childbirth

Dispatch of the Day

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According to estimates, around 28 million people wasted their entire precious bank holiday day off by sitting on their fat arses and watching this shitshow yesterday.

28.

fucking.

million.

Almost half the UK population literally couldn't think of anything better to do with a nice warm sunny day's holiday.

I think we've reached peak mental.

Edited by oaksoft
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10 minutes ago, oaksoft said:

According to estimates, around 28 million people wasted their entire precious bank holiday day off by sitting on their fat arses and watching this shitshow yesterday.

28.

fucking.

million.

Almost half the UK population literally couldn't think of anything better to do with a nice warm sunny day's holiday.

I think we've reached peak mental.

Seville calculator being used 

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20 minutes ago, oaksoft said:

According to estimates, around 28 million people wasted their entire precious bank holiday day off by sitting on their fat arses and watching this shitshow yesterday.

28.

fucking.

million.

Almost half the UK population literally couldn't think of anything better to do with a nice warm sunny day's holiday.

I think we've reached peak mental.

I was wanking over Meghan. What did you do?

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38 minutes ago, oaksoft said:

According to estimates, around 28 million people wasted their entire precious bank holiday day off by sitting on their fat arses and watching this shitshow yesterday.

28.

fucking.

million.

Almost half the UK population literally couldn't think of anything better to do with a nice warm sunny day's holiday.

I think we've reached peak mental.

28 million will be the number of people who saw a bit of it not the whole thing

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