Chants at Football Games

[Willie adie]

Who'll smash your head with a baseball bat,? Declan, Declan.

Who'll smash your head with a baseball bat ? Declan Gallagher

 

 

[Buddie Holly]

14 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said:

That's the only decent post so far, the rest are neither funny, offensive or nonsensical.

if it’s offensive you want then you’ll like this

oh we’ve got yardley and we’ve got ludo,alan mcgraw is shite at judo

 

[Swello]

28 minutes ago, Willie adie said:

Who'll smash your head with a baseball bat,? Declan, Declan.

Who'll smash your head with a baseball bat ? Declan Gallagher

 

 

We never went there

[Loonytoons]

6 hours ago, Swello said:

Always loved the singing at the fitba - one of the best things about it. 

I remember a 20 min chant of "Richard Gough - Child Molester" at Ibrox in 90's that had the denizens fucking raging - happy, innocent days.

"Hazel, Hazel - Show's yer tits" at the *Tennents Sixes* when she was interviewing someone in front of us. The police were involved (quite rightly given it was a national treasure that was being abused at a family event). Not proud.

Mike "Shitey" Galloway getting absolutely hounded by the East Stand when we were playing Celtic at Fir Park - along with Davie Cooper tormenting him on the field, he was visibly losing the plot - it resulted in a Celtic Supporter that had "Dr" as their title writing a letter to the main letters page in the Herald condemning it 

More recently - "Bob McHugh Shags the Birds" and "x birds went to bed with Boaby" (to the tune of "one man went to mow") were away game staples every time he was warming up as a sub. Apparently got him into trouble with his actual bird and I remember it had James McFadden in stitches first time he heard it up in Dingwall. One of these ones that everyone was tempted to join in.

The "Twist and Shout" at Ibrox after the playoff first leg was one of my favourites ever - great to be a part of.

 

Hey, shitey shitey

shitey, shitey, shitey Galloway

[Swello]

1 hour ago, Loonytoons said:

Hey, shitey shitey

shitey, shitey, shitey Galloway

I'm welling up with nostalgia here

[Frankly, Mr Shankly]

5 hours ago, Buddie Holly said:

if it’s offensive you want then you’ll like this

oh we’ve got yardley and we’ve got ludo,alan mcgraw is shite at judo

 

It’s my attic and I’ll…

[Richie]

That's taking it to a new level, slagging one of your own players off like that.[emoji23]

Marc Fitzpatrick also got it off the Well fans IIRC
"Blame it on Fitzpatrick... He just can't, he just can't, he just can't control the ball" etc.

I think the above was also aimed at Broadfoot.
There was one time we played Rangers and Broadfoot was taking an absolute hounding from the East Stand. With long, slow chants of "Broooooaaaadddfoooot". Besides him being shite generally, there was a time when he took a couple of foul throw-ins against us, which I think initiated it.
...Anyway, visibly triggered he snapped at half time at started giving it the 1-0 gestures etc to the fans - Precisely the raging response the Well fans were trying to provoke.
...Obviously he didn't fare much better in the 2nd half, especially when we equalised.

There was a chant of "Terry Butcher's Persil army" once - I think to do with a plane flying overhead which was adverising a rival product.

[Drew Brees]

Henry Henry drop the ball

Henry, drop the ball. 
 

Also last game of the 1999 season, at tannadice, chanting ‘bring on the pornstar’ as it was Dijkstras last game in Scotland and he was on the bench, they brought him in with 5 mins to go.

[Jinky67]

Charlie Adams Sisters Pants is one that sticks out, so many theories on this one but utterly nonsensical as apparently he doesn’t have a sister 

[Jacky1990]

Id rather shag a sheep than Mrs Mols was a belter

[A96]

The Red Shed singing “You’re just a fat Peter Pawlett” about Pawlett himself at the recent game at Pittodrie was quite humorous 

[GordonS]

15 hours ago, Swello said:

The "Twist and Shout" at Ibrox after the playoff first legwas one of my favourites ever - great to be a part of.

 

80 years from now this will be getting shared on a thread titled 'Video History of Scottish Football'.

 

[The Other Foot]

Not a big fan of paedo chants, but you've got to admire their efficacy - in a derby against hearts, not long after the Craig Thomson story broke, the entire East stand started chanting the 'cheeky smile' song. Thomson was subsequently switched to the other side of the pitch after becoming visibly irked. 

 

Aside from that, the 'What's it like to shag a h*n, Artur, Artur' chant was pretty reasonable craic 

 

Edited August 19, 2021 by The Other Foot

[Spam_Valley]

11 hours ago, Frankly, Mr Shankly said:

It’s my attic and I’ll…

Big fan of this one. 

[Sergeant Wilson]

Big skinny b*****d, you're just a big skinny b*****d, big skinny b*****d. Airdrie to Duncan Ferguson.but

He's black, he's gay, he plays for Aird-a-ray, Fashanu, Fashanu.

He's important, he's important, he's important Peter Davenport-ent.

[Ron Aldo]

Dougie Imrie's maws a mattress.

[TheScarf]

I mind in a Highland Derby in 2010 at Viccy Park the The Caley fans were singing 'Is your dad a fucking elephant?' to the massive-eared Michael McGovern and he grassed us to the police and stewards standing at the front of the terracing.

[kingjoey]

On 18/08/2021 at 09:56, Jimi Shandrix said:

Jim McLean baldy heeded c**t

I’m so old, that the one I liked was late sixties, and it was “Jerry Kerr, baldy heided c*nt”.

[Dandiest Don]

Oh I'd rather be a brush than a comb...

Sang on repeat to Alan Combe

[lubo_blaha]

After going 5-2 up on aggregate against Rijeka and Kairat Almaty waiting in the next round, the Richard Donald Stand at Pittodrie sang “You’re not going to Kazakhstan” towards a small band of Croatian away fans. I hope they understood what they were saying.