Immigrants of P&B

[welshbairn]

24 minutes ago, MSU said:

I've been to 44 states and visited the graves of 28 former presidents around the country.

That's a hell of a niche and dedicated way to get your hole. Kudos.

Edited August 6, 2021 by welshbairn

[BFTD]

15 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:

Aye, you’d normally have two.

Clearly you've never seen a Raad's donner hoagie.

Like a sheep stuffed in an elephant's trunk.

[MSU]

9 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

That's a hell of a niche and dedicated way to get your hole. Kudos.

At this point, it's practically performance art.

Edited August 6, 2021 by MSU

[MSU]

18 minutes ago, Torpar said:

I personally wouldn't mind leaving this province and never returning, though I have to admit small town Ontario can be quite nice, most places are outside of the GTA. 

My office is opposite the US Consulate in Toronto and can confirm you still can't bring in electrical stuff, the local convivence store will hold them for you for a fee. I'm been lucky enough here to find Irn Bru in two supermarket chains and at a Scottish owned chippy nearby, unfortunately said chippy doesn't offer the full range of delights you would get in a chippy back home. 

Before the pandemic, the missus and I would drive out to Oakville for the weekend, see British movies that never seem to make it to the US and hit the UK Grocers that seem to be scattered around the other wee towns in the area. We got haggis and square sausage poutine out there once, which was amazing. Things like that sway me greatly.

[philpy]

1 hour ago, SlipperyP said:

Bitch my fist, I'm tryiing..........got 15  good thais, it a shiitre....... 2 weeks dead,.

Problem we can still work but we have no produced, folk @philpy ?

 

Sorry, what??

[Torpar]

12 minutes ago, MSU said:

Before the pandemic, the missus and I would drive out to Oakville for the weekend, see British movies that never seem to make it to the US and hit the UK Grocers that seem to be scattered around the other wee towns in the area. We got haggis and square sausage poutine out there once, which was amazing. Things like that sway me greatly.

Oakville seems like a nice place, I'd love to move to Burlington if it was affordable. Haggis and square sausage in your poutine? Or all separate? Either way it sounds good. Still haven't made it to Michigan yet, despite it being reasonable close, used to see the Greyhound on its way to Detroit every morning and saying to myself I would take it one weekend. 

[carpetmonster]

18 minutes ago, MSU said:

Ha! No, the only place I've been where that was a thing was New Jersey which nearly got me into some bother when I didn't realize. Michigan also has the good sense to have those wee clippy things on the pump trigger that keeps it depressed. Connecticut doesn't have that, or at least it didn't, and it used to drive me mental that I had to stand there, depressing my own petrol pump trigger with my actual own fingers like a fucking neanderthal.

Oregon does it as well IIRC. And great shout about the wee shop that holds on to your phone while you’re in the Embassy, I’d totally forgotten about that. 

My story’s not that exciting - the company my wife  (then girlfriend) works for shifted a lot of stuff down to London, and in 2011 they told one of the guys she works with there was nothing for him to do in Scotland any more and he’d have to go down south. He said he didn’t fancy it so they offered him Miami, which he figured beat the f**k out of sunny Govan on a Monday morning. Roll forward a year and the better half’s main client’s had a management buyout and been Sevco’d within the space of a year. We knew what was about to happen and Chris offered that there was a job going in Miami if she wanted to apply. She did, got offered it and we thought f**k it, why not. 
 

Bit of poking around the visa process revealed we’d have to get married for me to get anything other than a tourist visa, so we did that - I’m basically a big dodgy Nigerian at this point. She went in Jan 2013 and I hung back a couple of months to get the house rented out and paperwork tidied up. She left behind a bag with a load of underwear in it and for some reason I volunteered to put it in a Jiffy bag and mail it rather than just telling her to go to TJ Maxx which led to a very confused post office clerk having to confirm I was mailing a job lot of women’s underpants to a man in Miami called Christopher. 
 

May 2014, Carpetmonster Jr appeared and we discovered first hand how much of a cartel the US healthcare system is (doctor trying to insist on completely unnecessary c-section, hospital trying to bill us for a anaesthesia my wife never had). 2016 her job got obsoleted and it was a case of find another one within the US operation or take the payoff and piss off out the country. This was just after the Brexit vote so our logic of ‘f**k it, let’s go to Miami; London’s always gonna be there if we need to go back’ was looking shoogly and she got a new job in Chicago where we moved Nov 2016. 2018 we got green cards and aren’t tied to her company any more; if they want to pay her off again we take the money and stay where we are. 
 

I love Chicago. The wee one goes to a great school, the Parks Dept are fantastic between summer camps and the lakefront stuff. I dislike the fact it’s so segregated and 4 years in Miami makes me really dislike the winters here, which are a bit silly. Looking like we’re going to move to New York next year and I’ll miss it. Not that I don’t want to go to NY, I think after I made the first big jump, then no issues, it’s just a case of wherever the wind takes us. 
 

I miss family and friends - perversely the pandemic’s been great for that because time zones matter less when everybody’s working from home - I’ve spoken to folks more in the last year than in the prior 7. The issue with Zoom pub quizzes is that you’re 6 hours behind GMT, so while everyone else can go to bed pleasantly rattled at 11pm, it’s 5 here and you’ve got to get dinner together while off your tits. Would I go back? I dunno. While cost of living here is more expensive, salary increases dwarf it. We’re earning comfortably 3-3.5 times what we did in Glasgow even when COL’s taken into account. We had a good social circle in Miami because nobody’s from there, everyone’s only been there 20 minutes so it’s easy to meet folks, everyone’s looking to get themselves out there. Chicago is more like a giant Glasgow, people are normal and there’s not a lot of airs and graces about the place. Trump polled something like 8% here so I do feel like I’m a little bastion of common sense. Nobody’s ever tried to talk to me about Jesus apart from the Mormon missionaries I ran into in Mexico. Oh, and the preacher on State Street that shouts at smokers that they’re going to hell for using cigarettes. My e-fag seemed to confuse him and he went back to screaming at randoms coming out of the subway. 

[MSU]

8 minutes ago, Torpar said:

Oakville seems like a nice place, I'd love to move to Burlington if it was affordable. Haggis and square sausage in your poutine? Or all separate? Either way it sounds good. Still haven't made it to Michigan yet, despite it being reasonable close, used to see the Greyhound on its way to Detroit every morning and saying to myself I would take it one weekend. 

Yeah, Burlington is great too. In fact, that might have been the location of the poutine, in a pub called The Charles Dickens, I think. It was all mooshed together and it was incredibly good.

[Duszek]

6 hours ago, Inanimate Carbon Rod said:

Just wondering have any of you ever encountered the kind of exceptionalist shite foreign migrants get over here with the ‘dey dook or jaabs’ type stuff or are the places youve settled not backward hick shiteholes?

As regards the French, probably no surprise to learn that I’ve encountered no racism or negative vibes at all. The exact opposite. They’re as big fans of Scotland as you’ll find anywhere, which proved helpful in the past when getting busted for traveling without bus/train tickets.

”Ah, l’Ecosse” the inspector would say wistfully, before enquiring about my interest in whisky/rugby/ghosts.

I’ve made a point of lecturing them that, in Scotland, rugby is played exclusively by paedophiles.

[Torpar]

14 minutes ago, carpetmonster said:

 

Bit of poking around the visa process revealed we’d have to get married for me to get anything other than a tourist visa, so we did that - I’m basically a big dodgy Nigerian at this point. She went in Jan 2013 and I hung back a couple of months to get the house rented out and paperwork tidied up. She left behind a bag with a load of underwear in it and for some reason I volunteered to put it in a Jiffy bag and mail it rather than just telling her to go to TJ Maxx which led to a very confused post office clerk having to confirm I was mailing a job lot of women’s underpants to a man in Miami called Christopher. 
 

 

 

 

[carpetmonster]

3 minutes ago, Torpar said:

 

If you have a link to that underwear I’m buying her it for our anniversary. 

[gannonball]

5 hours ago, Jacksgranda said:

I moved to our beloved province/the occupied six counties (delete as per your prejudice) in 1973, like a lot of things in my life, it seemed like a good idea at the time. I needed a job, having just finished a quantity surveying course at polytechnic, and thought a change of scene might do me good. There was a job on offer in Coleraine (the chief partner was a Scotsman) and although The Troubles were basically at their worst, Coleraine hadn't been affected. Until I applied for the job - the Railway Road bomb - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1973_Coleraine_bombings

I also had (still have) relatives here, and knew things weren't (quite) as bad as portrayed on TV.

Got the job, moved to Coleraine, got digs - the landlady was 8 months pregnant and said I could stay till the baby was born - I was there 6 years - and settled in. Found it very much like Scotland.

Never had any real hankerings to move back, I would have visited twice a year and always tried to squeeze in a match at Pittodrie, I did miss the scotch pies and rowies and still do. Got my football fix by supporting Coleraine.

Despite having no great hankerings to move back, a couple of times I applied for jobs in Scotland, I think I actually got offered one but it's that long ago I can't really remember.

Thought i was destined for the life of a bachelor till I met my wife in 1992 and we celebrated our silver wedding anniversary this year (with her self isolating because she had Covid).

The scenery here is spectacular, even the view from the top of our garden is quite stunning (currently unavailable due to grandson nr 3's sheep), and Donegal is only an hour away, equally spectacular.

Folk are friendly/nosy depending how you take it, and having lived here for 48 years it's my home. The downside was obviously The Troubles and the resulting legacy of bitterness and division, which may never heal. Because of the money poured into security over the years infrastructure has suffered. Whenever I arrived here the M2 (I think that part is actually the M22) went as far as Randalstown. 48 years later it still only goes to Randalstown although in the last year it has been dualled to Castledawson. Dungiven - Londonderry is also being dualled, so that only leaves the bit in the middle, a mammoth task. There is still no dual carriageway from Londonderry to Ballygawley, despite £80 million having been spent - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-58090116 - There is still no motorway from Ballymena-Coleraine-Limavady-Londonderry although a lot of it has been dualled in the last few years. There is a bit of dual carriageway between Moneymore and Cookstown that hasn't been extended since it was built , 47 years ago. It's 2.3 miles long. I've never figured out why this bit only of the A29 is dualled.

Omagh is still the forgotten town, no motorway or dual carriageway for it.

The train service is actually quite good, the main problem being over 70% of the service was closed down 60 years ago and never replaced by buses, again partly a legacy of the Troubles to a certain extent.

I haven't been back to Scotland since my parents died and with our health the way it is it's unlikely I'll ever be back.

I'm content with my life and quite happy with my lot, I think the quality of life here is excellent, and have no regrets about moving here.

For some reason I had you as an Ulster man who moved to Scotland rather than the other way round.

[Miguel Sanchez]

2 hours ago, MSU said:

What a great thread.

I've only been back to Scotland three times in the last nine years, and I haven't been back since 2015, when my mum passed away. I've no real family left in Scotland so I don't know if or when I'll be back, and I've made my peace with that. I do miss my friends back home, I miss square sausage which I've tried and failed to recreate a hundred times. I miss Irn Bru. I miss the NHS. I miss Raads kebab in Alloa, Falcone's chippy in Carronshore, I miss getting off the work's bus outside Morrison's Cold Beer with every intention of going straight home and then ending up in the pub until 9. Again. I miss public transport. I miss being able to drive by the house in Carronshore where my family lived from 1950 and which was always my sanctuary and safety net. I miss that last one a lot.

 

They don't make Irn-Bru any more so you're not missing out on that. 

[Duszek]

4 hours ago, SlipperyP said:

Bitch my fist, I'm tryiing..........got 15  good thais, it a shiitre....... 2 weeks dead,.

I’ve been saying this for YEARS, but will people listen? Sadly, no.

[parsforlife]

10 hours ago, effeffsee_the2nd said:

during the clap for NHS last year someone, can't remeber who, reconed that nurses were mostly fat lazy bints who sat around eating quality street all day either gossiping or looking through their phones 

The joke goes back WAY further than covid.

[Tight minge]

8 hours ago, Torpar said:

We actually looked at the Oshawa/Pickering area as a place to move but like anywhere that's within 90 minutes of Toronto, the price of homes are ridiculous. Barrie is now the move expensive city to rent in Ontario, I like the South Barrie/Innisfil area a lot, especially near Lake Simcoe but it's out of our price range, even Brantford is getting expensive, so moving out of province looks more attractive at the moment. 

I don’t doubt if I had kept the house there would have been good value in it. At least being at the top end of Oshawa it was a little more pleasant, but all in all not for me. Got relations in Collingwood which looked fine, but probably very expensive now.

 

 

[Raidernation]

Well…….

2009 and Mrs. RN#2 committed suicide. I was having a shit time sleeping and found an online bereavement support group that, because I was online at c0200-0500 BST/GMT was full of folks from the Americas and the antipodes.

A group of us split off as a friends group to escape the “grief junkies” and friendships grew. I got close to a lovely lady whose husband died around the same time as my wife and it grew from online chat to phone calls to me visiting and the rest. We got married late 2010 and the immigration fun started. Sadly she died before we completed the 2 year spouse visa probationary period so I had to reapply. A shit show, but I have permanent residency and hope to do citizenship next year.

Back at the time of moving the only family I had in Scotland was my brother ( and we weren’t close) so there really wasn’t anyone to miss other than a few really good friends. And since my brother died in 2019 that’s one less reason to return.

Here I have 3 fantastic stepdaughters (all adults) 2 local to me in Illinois and one in Virginia, and two amazing granddaughters that are close by.

My views on Chicago are slightly colored by having taught on the West and South side, which are scary places, but life in the suburbs is pretty great. Thankfully they need “math” [emoji2961] teachers here so I’ve been almost constantly in work.

I miss the Dons and decent fresh fish and meat, but I probably miss the sea most of all. Will I ever return? For a visit yes, but not permanently as my family are here now.

Good thing is there are a f**k-ton of AA meetings close to me and it doesn’t seem quite as stigmatised as it once was [emoji1303]

Never been treated badly, usually I just get lots of compliments on the accent (anyone fa kens me kens it’s nae aat bad) neither too Doric or Caithness, (thank fcuk).

Just saving up for retirement now! [emoji1787]

[Jacksgranda]

5 hours ago, Raidernation said:

Well…….

2009 and Mrs. RN#2 committed suicide. I was having a shit time sleeping and found an online bereavement support group that, because I was online at c0200-0500 BST/GMT was full of folks from the Americas and the antipodes.

A group of us split off as a friends group to escape the “grief junkies” and friendships grew. I got close to a lovely lady whose husband died around the same time as my wife and it grew from online chat to phone calls to me visiting and the rest. We got married late 2010 and the immigration fun started. Sadly she died before we completed the 2 year spouse visa probationary period so I had to reapply. A shit show, but I have permanent residency and hope to do citizenship next year.

Back at the time of moving the only family I had in Scotland was my brother ( and we weren’t close) so there really wasn’t anyone to miss other than a few really good friends. And since my brother died in 2019 that’s one less reason to return.

Here I have 3 fantastic stepdaughters (all adults) 2 local to me in Illinois and one in Virginia, and two amazing granddaughters that are close by.

My views on Chicago are slightly colored by having taught on the West and South side, which are scary places, but life in the suburbs is pretty great. Thankfully they need “math” teachers here so I’ve been almost constantly in work.

I miss the Dons and decent fresh fish and meat, but I probably miss the sea most of all. Will I ever return? For a visit yes, but not permanently as my family are here now.

Good thing is there are a f**k-ton of AA meetings close to me and it doesn’t seem quite as stigmatised as it once was

Never been treated badly, usually I just get lots of compliments on the accent (anyone fa kens me kens it’s nae aat bad) neither too Doric or Caithness, (thank fcuk).

Just saving up for retirement now!

You've had a time of it R N, good to hear things are going well.

I, too, acquired a step family when I got married - 6 of them, although 4 had left home, and that only left what I termed the two wee ones, who between them now have 8 wee ones of their own + another 8 scattered over the 4 big ones  so I've 16 stepgrandchildren, the light of my life (most of the time). One great grandchild and another on the way, not that we'll see him/her.

And I'm enjoying retirement, best thing I ever did, wish I'd done it when I was 18...

[BillyAnchor]

Moved to usa usa usa in 1991 and loved it for a few years. Now I am beyond sick of it and ready to come hame.

 

Gis a job.

[Rugster]

9 hours ago, parsforlife said:

The joke goes back WAY further than covid.

Indeed. One of Stuart Dickson’s posts if I remember well.