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Sword fights


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Just now, Richey Edwards said:

How about the last one?

Sorry, I was thinking about it for the next life. Running stark bollock naked down a rainy street, madly swinging a claymore at some Clancy Brown looking motherfucker, while screaming distantly-remembered gibberish from a past life about him being on the verge of tears.

Too many responsibilities for that kind of thing in this life, sadly.

2 minutes ago, Slenderman said:

Just once.

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Is it true that you had the skitters that day?

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We used to have "sword" fights in school with rulers. I used to get walloped by a mate who had a better ruler.

Fed up with sore knuckles, on a trip to Hadrian's Wall I bought a 30 inch solid wood "Roman" ruler. The next ruler sword fight ended in a satisfyingly bruising victory for the Roman army and my mate going off sword fights, the wimp.

Moral: get yourself a bigger sword.

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I ended up in a sword fight with a pal I hadn't seen in 20+ years. I tried to psych him out by saying if he hit me I would become more powerful than he possibly imagined. Didn't work. c**t just wiped me and I had to spend the rest of my life following a wean around giving him unwarranted life advice.

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6 minutes ago, NotThePars said:

I ended up in a sword fight with a pal I hadn't seen in 20+ years. I tried to psych him out by saying if he hit me I would become more powerful than he possibly imagined. Didn't work. c**t just wiped me and I had to spend the rest of my life following a wean around giving him unwarranted life advice.

You want to go home and rethink your life

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I was eating lunch in the cafeteria one day when this guy went off on one. Picked up a knife and started waving it about and shouting. Me and a mate managed to subdue him but he did end up cutting himself. 

I felt really off afterwards. I was sweaty, nervous and agitated. I couldn't even stay at work, so went for a walk to try to take the edge off.

I'm not sure what came over me but I went home and picked up a foil and headed back to work. On seeing me with it, some guys just ran away. I started talking to a co-worker who I fancied but out of nowhere two of my bosses attacked me and knocked me clean out. 

I woke up a little later in a nurse's office. I'd been given an injection and started to feel a lot better. I got back to work a few minutes later and things calmed down a bit. 

Spoiler

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