Conquering Europe

[oneteaminglasgow]

I'm off to Armenia.

Lernayin Artsakh Goris (L.A. Goris) are a team who are originally from Stepanakert, which is in the disputed Nagorno-Karabakh region - you may have noticed that there was a bit of a war over that recently. Obviously, being in a warzone isn't conducive to a successful football team, so they're now based in Goris, a town in southern Armenia which is relatively close to Stepanakert. 

Anyway, they're absolute nobodies. There's only 15 teams in the Armenian league system, 10 in the top flight, and the second flight is 11 sides - 5 proper teams, and 6 second teams. Despite that, the major honours page for this L.A. Goris reads as follows...

First job for me is to get into the top flight. If I can manage that, then who knows. I've also looked and we only have 16 first team players, including 3 goalkeepers, and some utter dross thrown in there. Might need to rectify that. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

L.A. Goris - Meet the Team

5 or 4.5 stars is 'decent players for the second tier', anything below that is presumably 'not good enough for the second tier'

Right, by the standards of my squad, this is pretty decent. Hovhannisyan is good enough, none of the rest are. Israelyan will be getting punted as soon as I can find someone else.

None of these guys are good enough, and I really, really need some new players here.

You'll notice that a lot of these are the same guys who've already made an appearance. Really need some good players here.

I have a good left back, a dodgy central defence and an obvious weak point at right back. It's like a Scotland squad.

If Avanesyan gets injured then I'm absolutely fucked.

So that's my (dreadful) squad. A lot of work needed here.

[oneteaminglasgow]

Transfers 2067

This boy had left before I got the job, which is a shame because he's quite good. Oh well. I had no one in my squad who anyone would want to sign, so this is it.

And I brought in a load of players so that I could actually have a squad capable of being vaguely competent in this division.

Aramayis Vardanyan is centre midfielder/left winger, and he's basically quite poor. Good first touch, decent decision making but absolutely nothing else. The standard of this division is absolutely appalling though, so he'll be fine.

Spoiler

Karen Davidyan is a central midfielder or central defender, and he's basically here to provide depth. He's fine defensively, but absolutely nothing special. I needed a lot of players to give me a functional squad, and he's one of them.

Spoiler

Karen Vardanyan is a central midfielder, and he looks pretty good by the standards of the division/my team. Good tackler, good technique. decent enough physical stats. I'm pleased with him.

Spoiler

Kontantin Melnikov is a midfielder or attacking midfielder, and he's another here for depth. He's a good passes with decent vision, and on that basis he should do well.

Spoiler

Harutyun Arshakyan is a centre back, who can also cover at left back, but he's ok enough with the ball on the deck. Absolutely dreadful in the air though. Still, he'll be mostly fine.

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Arman Voskanyan is here to be my back up goalkeeper. He's not great, but he's much better than the previous back up options I had, so that's that. Means that if my number 1 gets injured then I'm not completely fucked.

Spoiler

Arthur Galstyan is another centre midfielder/winger, and he's got absolutely nothing particularly good about his game. Still, gives me options.

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Rafael Hovhannisyan is my back up striker, and he's ok. His movement is decent, he's got good technique and first touch but his finishing and physical stats are really quite poor. He's only back up though.

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Petar Vasilev is a central midfielder, he's another not brilliant but he should do a decent enough job. Will be one of my first choice 11 at any rate.

Spoiler

Taron Petrosyan is an attacking midfielder or right winger, and he's got good technique and flair so I would like to hope that he'll be a decent player for me, with a bit of creativity, but he's not got much else.

Spoiler

So that's it. I've certainly improved on the utter pish I inherited, but I wouldn't expect this squad to be doing much. Probably be relatively competitive but we're not going up this year.

[oneteaminglasgow]

August 2067

Pretty decent start I'd say, particularly the game against Sevan when I was still playing a fair amount of utter dross.

As I said, I wouldn't expect us to be near the top of the table, but if we can keep this up then who knows.

Early days. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

September 2067

More like what I expected. We were better than Ararat-2, but had to rescue the game with a last minute penalty and we were just outplayed by Urartu-2.

This is about what I would expect for this season. We're very much a work in progress.

Germany

Two comfortable wins, but we're still not really scoring as many as I'd like. Its fine though, I'll take the six points and move on.

We're up to second place now, and we face Scotland next. Need to win that. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

October 2067

Well that's... that's not great, is it? We were completely outplayed in the cup game by a mid-table top tier side, which shows how far off that standard we are. We were actually ok in the league, but not scoring any goals all month is never going to go well.

Aye, we're not a particularly good side.

Germany

A much better time of it here. We weren't outstanding against Scotland, but Dusan Kucernak was and dragged us through. That last minute goal also means we've got the superior head to head record, which could prove important. 

Azerbaijan aren't up to much, as demonstrated.

We should qualify now, with games against Cyprus and Montenegro to go. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

November 2067

Following on from our poor form last month, we got handed the perfect game to address that with a trip to face the worst team in the division, and our comfortable win gave us a bit of confidence. We then beat the league leaders, although we needed two penalties to do it and didn't create much else. Defended well though, and took our chances when they came.

Fired us up to the right end of the table. We're still nowhere near top, and frankly my team isn't close to ready for promotion, but it's better than dicking about at the bottom of the league.

Germany

Montenegro set up with a simple game plan: park the fucking bus. They did it very effectively though, so fair play to them.

We were comfortable against Cyprus though, and that was good enough for us.

We're going to Euros. We're current World Champions, and have also won the last two Euros, so will be trying for three in a row.

[oneteaminglasgow]

December 2067

Just one game this month, and it was our third away victory in a row. Sevan gave us a hand by going down to ten men after 15 minutes, but it was already 1-0 by that point so I don't think it was totally decisive.

And we're still in fourth. 

I'd be quite happy to end up here this season. It's only a 20 game season, so not too long left. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

January 2068

Weird game against Shirak-2, it was pretty even but they won 3-0. Would also say we had the better chances, but these things happen.

We were miles ahead of BKMA though, thrashed them.

Still in where we were, which is fine.

[oneteaminglasgow]

February 2068

A couple of signings this month - well, I signed one of them in about November but I was only allowed to register him this month. That signing was Erik Torosyan, a right back who looks, for this level, very decent. He's decent enough defensively, and his positioning is good, but he doesn't really offer anything going forward. That said, if he can help us concede fewer goals then that'll be something.

Spoiler

The other signing was at the other end of the pitch, with striker Steve Mallet. He's a bit different to my other strikers, in that he should be better in the penalty box than they are, but will probably provide less in other aspects of play. Should do well though, and means that I now have a fairly competent strikeforce with three options now up to the required options.

Spoiler

Mallet managed to get a goal on his debut, but a draw in our only game this month. That said, Ararat-2 are a fairly decent side so fair play to them and we definitely didn't deserve more than a point. We also held on with ten men at the end, so I'm fairly happy with the result.

And with six games left, this is how the table looks. We've got absolutely no chance of going up, which is absolutely certain to be West Armenia, but it's been a decent season.

[oneteaminglasgow]

March 2068

A good month, we should have beaten Urartu-2 as well but oh well.

We're pretty clearly one of the best teams in the division, so that's nice. Need to build on that for next season.

Three more games, and it'd be nice to just get as many points as possible, and secure third. Should be doable.

Germany

A friendly, and I'm sure the home American crowd would have been thrilled. They're ranked 18th in the world, so good to beat them so comfortably.

[Smurph]

I've been following for about a month but decided to read the whole thing as I've started back at uni - but mainly to see if you'd ever been sacked. What a career and f**k Penya, they really missed out.

You played Swift Hesperange in a European Conference tie with Bala City before. I couldn't find any more crossovers of your teams, apart from when you've been in the same league of course.

Are you going to keep this going with FM22 looming?

[oneteaminglasgow]

2 minutes ago, Smurph said:

I've been following for about a month but decided to read the whole thing as I've started back at uni - but mainly to see if you'd ever been sacked. What a career and f**k Penya, they really missed out.

You played Swift Hesperange in a European Conference tie with Bala City before. I couldn't find any more crossovers of your teams, apart from when you've been in the same league of course.

Are you going to keep this going with FM22 looming?

I didn’t realise that about playing against Hesperange before, cheers.

I’m planning on keeping it going until I’ve finished it off - by the time FM22 comes out I’ll have spent almost a year on this, so I might as well see it through. Can always just wait for FM23 if it comes to it. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

We got our group drawn for the European Championships, and it's - by an absolute mile - the toughest group in the draw. Group F is Russia, Sweden, Iceland and Bosnia for fucks sake, all of whom are worse than Turkey. 

I suppose if we're going to win the thing we'll need to beat these sorts of teams at some point, but I'd have liked an easier start to the tournament.

[oneteaminglasgow]

And our Nations League draw as well. If we're better than Italy, it'll be all good. 

[oneteaminglasgow]

April 2068

We led in both of these games, and probably should have won but just couldn't get the goal to kill it off or stop them from getting back into it. Oh well.

One game left, against newly crowned champions West Armenia, and we'll be finishing either third or fourth.

Good first season though.

[oneteaminglasgow]

Swift Hesperange become the first former side of mine to retain their title. Well done, lads.

[oneteaminglasgow]

May 2068

And we finish our season with a very dull draw. They hit the post, and we drifted a free kick aimlessly over the bar, but that was basically it.

And there we go - third place. I'll definitely take that, I would think the squad I inherited was among the worst in the division, so pretty pleased with the progress. Still a lot of work needed.

[oneteaminglasgow]

The 2068 European Championships

We head into these European Championships having won the last two, and having been crowned World Champions two years ago as well. We're ranked as the best team in Europe, the second best in the world, and so we're probably the favourites going into this. It's being jointly hosted by Belgium and the Netherlands, and we head to the tournament to face a group containing this...

As I noted above, it's the toughest group in the tournament, featuring a very good Italian side, one of the host nations in Belgium and Turkey, who definitely aren't shite either. Still, we're world champions for a reason and I'd like to think we can get through this, especially with four sides in third place going through.

Our preparation for the tournament was a couple of friendlies against decent enough European sides, but nothing really like the quality we'll be facing in our group (bar Serbia, who are pretty similar to Turkey). It was a reasonably useful exercise though, I played some fringe players against Serbia who showed that they aren't up to it, and all the goals we conceded were from set pieces so gave me something to work on. As I said, useful.

Anyway, here we go...

Spoiler

Did anyone else watch the monstrosity that was Slovakia v Sweden at the 2020 Euros? This was basically like that, utter, utter dross settled by a penalty kick.

We didn't really deserve the win, but I'll absolutely take it. Also means that we're basically through already, so that's nice. Not many sides go out with three points. I'd still like to win more games though, obviously, just thinking for the worst case scenario

Looking good, and Belgium opened their home tournament with a win over Italy.

Spoiler

And that's job done for us. Unlike the first game, we were actually very decent in this one, and completely controlled the game. Belgium had a goal disallowed by VAR, but other than didn't really threaten us and then we took our chances when then they came. Thoroughly professional job.

As I said, job done for us. Looks like Italy may be heading out as well, unless they beat us.

Spoiler

We should have won that game - their keeper had a blinder - and it was another set piece that we conceded from, but got the draw in the end so that's good. It also dumps Italy out the competition early doors, and I'd have expected them to be contenders, so that's good news.

That's how our group ends up, and the other teams through are....

The big shock is obviously Spain heading out. A quick look and I'd make us, France and England the favourites, with maybe Portugal an outside bet.

Spoiler

The game went pretty much how you would expect a Germany v Scotland game to go. Scotland were resolute defensively, but didn't offer very much going forward and we struggled to break them down but once we did, it was game over and we should have gotten a few more.

Norway seem to be a good team, so that'll be tough.

The full second round went as follows...

France out - so that's one of the favourites down, and surprised that England had to squeeze by Israel.

On another note, that Serbia v Bosnia game would have been a tense affair.

Spoiler

We started very slowly, and were rightfully trailing after ten minutes but we grew into it, and the own goal really gave us a confidence boost. From then on, we were in total control and deserved the win.

Well, we beat them in a friendly in the warm ups, so I'd like to hope we can repeat the feat.

And the full quarter final line up went...

We have to be favourites, I think. Surprising to see both the Portuguese and English head out, but there you go.

Spoiler

We made really hard work of that. We were completely in control for the first 30 minutes, then when we scored we stopped playing for some reason and sat back.  Fortunately, they weren't good enough to take advantage of that, including missing a penalty. It was very similar to the Finland game in our world cup campaign. 

In any case, it's enough to see us through to the final.

As for the other semi final?

Serbia it is, then.

Spoiler

And it's three in a row for Germany!

Utterly dominant display, probably the most dominant we've been in any game throughout the tournament. I was worried based on the fact that we lost our final warm up friendly against Serbia, but they really didn't trouble us at all.

And we're champions of Europe, as well as the world.

Given that I've now won both the tournaments available to me as Germany manager, it seemed a good time to do this...

I'll look for another international job in a wee while, in another one of the confederations, see if I can win those too.

Anyway, 58 games, 50 wins, 4 draws and 4 losses with medals in the World Cup and European Championships. It's been a fruitful spell in charge of Germany. 

 

[oneteaminglasgow]

f**k this, that's the second time these c***s have turned me down. Arseholes.