Things You Wish You Had Known Much Earlier

[Hedgecutter]

Fairly self-explanatory.  Some random ones to kick off with:

1. Microwaving beef sausages for 3 mins prior to grilling removes most ambiguity over whether they'll be cooked inside, thus making them far more enjoyable to eat.

2. The 'Activity' tab in the P&B menu.  Life-changing.

3. Not all Bovril taste gads, just the quasi-liquid version from glass jars that is vastly inferior to the magnificent granular dried version.

4. Although Gmail has a default normal inbox and a separate spam folder, some messages don't end up in either of these and instead only appear in the relatively well-hidden 'All Mail' section.  Failure to realise this may end up in embarrassment should you be adamant that something critical wasn't sent because you've "even checked your spam folder and it's clearly not in there either".

5. Turning the volume right down on a Samsung phone doesn't necessarily mean that videos won't play at full volume for all to hear.

Edited September 11, 2020 by Hedgecutter

[Melanius Mullarkey]

For me it has to be:

1. Women trap you then they sue you before you even know.

2. The can can is such a pretty show, but back stage on earth again the dressing room is gray.

3. When you want her lips you get a cheek. You want some more, shes fast asleep twinkling with the stars.

 

[Szamo's_Ammo]

1. By pulling out the flaps on an Oxo cube foil covering, crunching the Oxo and then cutting the foil with scissors, it negates the need for having to crunch the Oxo with your fingers directly and then be carrying that strong beef smell around with you for hours/days.

2. The 'Activity' button.

3. It always seems to go that you don't know what you've got til it's gone.

[Bairnardo]

Didnt know I liked tea till I was about 20.

Didnt know I liked eggs till I was about 25.

The oxo thing above I only learned about 2 years ago.

Theres lots that I still dont know, so this is certainly a thread with potential. Updates as I get them.

[ICTJohnboy]

I used to think that crabs were something you could pick up when exploring rocky coastlines.

[Mark Connolly]

30 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

For me it has to be:

1. Women trap you then they sue you before you even know.

2. The can can is such a pretty show, but back stage on earth again the dressing room is gray.

3. When you want her lips you get a cheek. You want some more, shes fast asleep twinkling with the stars.

 

Based on my assumption that these 3 things are connected, I wish I'd known your wife was a can-can dancer.

[Newbornbairn]

What's wrong with beefy fingers?

[Bairnardo]

What's wrong with beefy fingers?

^^^ fingered a cow

[Hedgecutter]

On the subject of stinky fingers...

 

Rubbing your fingers with veggie oil and then mixing in Fairy liquid prior to rinsing with hot water is a quick and extremely effective way of removing balsam or other tree saps from your hands. 

ETA:  Washing a pan containing fat is far more pleasant and much easier when you apply the Fairy direct and give it a thorough scrub without water, prior to rinsing the resultant broken-down white mix off under hot water.  No oily hands or oil down the sink.

Edited September 11, 2020 by Hedgecutter

[Newbornbairn]

35 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

36 minutes ago, NewBornBairn said:

What's wrong with beefy fingers?

^^^ fingered a cow

... haven't we all?

[Newbornbairn]

29 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

On the subject of stinky fingers...

  Reveal hidden contents

Rubbing your fingers with veggie oil and then mixing in Fairy liquid prior to rinsing with hot water is a quick and extremely effective way of removing balsam or other tree saps from your hands. 

ETA:  Washing a pan containing fat is far more pleasant and much easier when you apply the Fairy direct and give it a thorough scrub without water, prior to rinsing the resultant broken-down white mix off under hot water.  No oily hands or oil down the sink.

That's the proper way to use swarfega

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

3 hours ago, ICTJohnboy said:

I used to think that crabs were something you could pick up when exploring rocky coastlines.

^^^^^^Not in the cleek

[Deanburn Dave]

5. Turning the volume right down on a Samsung phone doesn't necessarily mean that videos won't play at full volume for all to hear.

Embarrassed Pornhub watcher found.

[Jacksgranda]

5 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

Fairly self-explanatory.  Some random ones to kick off with:

1. Microwaving beef sausages for 3 mins prior to grilling removes most ambiguity over whether they'll be cooked inside, thus making them far more enjoyable to eat.

2. The 'Activity' tab in the P&B menu.  Life-changing.

3. Not all Bovril taste gads, just the quasi-liquid version from glass jars that is vastly inferior to the magnificent granular dried version.

4. Although Gmail has a default normal inbox and a separate spam folder, some messages don't end up in either of these and instead only appear in the relatively well-hidden 'All Mail' section.  Failure to realise this may end up in embarrassment should you be adamant that something critical wasn't sent because you've "even checked your spam folder and it's clearly not in there either".

5. Turning the volume right down on a Samsung phone doesn't necessarily mean that videos won't play at full volume for all to hear.

Are you Neil Doncaster?

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

Twisted little DAB's who live with mummy are best avoided on here.

Thank you.

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

4 minutes ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Twisted little DAB's who live with mummy are best avoided on here.

Thank you.

This reads better than your first draft.

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

10 minutes ago, Zen Archer Esq. said:

This reads better than your first draft.

I know that.

Thank you.

[Szamo's_Ammo]

4. When packing a suitcase, rolling your clothes up means you can fit more in and causes less creasing to occur. 

5. Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

6. There are adults who don't understand the function of an apostrophe.

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

Touched a nerve yet again. Dearie me.

 

 

Edited September 11, 2020 by Bigmouth Strikes Again

[welshbairn]

 

6 hours ago, Bairnardo said:

6 hours ago, NewBornBairn said:

What's wrong with beefy fingers?

^^^ fingered a cow

 

5 hours ago, NewBornBairn said:

... haven't we all?

Not before demolishing its head with a sledge hammer, no.

Edited September 11, 2020 by welshbairn