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Managing Saints, with a RandomTwist


RandomGuy.

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On 03/05/2020 at 19:24, RandomGuy. said:

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So far down the rabbit hole, the Board aren't even judging me on this season.

Relegation is 100% guaranteed IMO. David Hopkin takes most of the blame, this is the squad he built...

For reference, 4* players are classed as "good Premiership players"/3* as "leading Championship players"

Goalkeepers

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Not bad, could be better. Will struggle to improve on Clark early on but that is the plan.

Defenders

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Just awful.

Gordon the only one up to top flight standard, zero idea why Daley-Campbell is rated so highly, he literally has no attribute above 8 other than his pace which is maxed out.

The rest is worrying and explains a lot about why the club are hurtling towards the abyss.

Midfielders

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A bit more to work with, but the wide positions are talentless, and theres no depth centrally.

May in injured for my first month in charge.

Strikers

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Hendry another whos injured, and will miss the rest of the season.

N'Lundulu is a Southampton loanee, who isn't up it at this club, yet is somehow the best.

A woeful, woeful, collection.

 

Don't memorise many names of that lot, as most will be fucked off in the Summer regardless of what league we end up in.

This was the situation when I joined.

February 26th 2022.

I've now been in charge for 10 years.

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February 2031/32

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Those 0-0s are a double edged sword.

Going away to Celtic and Torino and managing it is great. Doing the same at home to Dundee is not.

Meunier has been sensational this month, while Lee Clark, a 20yo youth graduate, looks every inch Heaths successor now that injuries have given him a run.

We play Monchengaldbach in the next round of the Europa, and either Celtic or United in the Scottish Cup Semi.

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Feels like this is going the whole way, unless I decide to stop drawing every two games.

Its in our own hands, as a win in the game in hand takes us top. Interesting to see in what new inventive way I can bottle it.

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10 hours ago, Poet of the Macabre said:

It’s happening!

How are the Pars getting on and who’s in charge?

Gavin Strachan is your manager, he was previously your U18s manager for 5 years.

Sitting mid-table Championship this season and unlikely to go either way, a decent showing as its your first in the Championship since being relegated to League One in 2026/27.

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March 2031/32 (plus final pre-split game)

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I'm just putting it straight out there, but I chucked Europe.

Both legs were wedged in between league games and I had a choice to make, so chose the League. No great loss as we would've been drawn with Celtic. We also got Celtic in the Scottish Cup, and play them first after the split, so would've had four consecutive games against them. Delighted to have missed that tbh.

Meunier isn't a player I even intended to sign until Barca went for Ortega on deadline day, what a fucking deal thats turned out to be. Boys incredible.

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Think its almost safe to rule Hearts out now, 15 to play for and they have to gain 8 more points than me. Its more than possible since we're bottling shitebags, but I'm optimistic.

This is the next round of fixtures...

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Home tie, and a massive one. We could lose and still win the title, but goal difference would become massive.

If we win?...

Heres my full fixture list remaining...

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A chance we could win the title, and be the first team in this save to take it from Celtic, at Ibrox.

Edited by RandomGuy.
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25 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

You're going to draw these five games out over as many days, aren't you?

Was planning on doing a post for each game week tbh, but it shouldn't take too long, probably be tomorrow night before its done though, maybe Saturday if I chuck my laptop out a window.

Actually I'm out tomorrow so it'll be Saturday for sure.

Edited by RandomGuy.
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Scottish Cup Semi-Final 2031/32

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Meunier again, melted one in from the edge of the box.

And that means...

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I play Aberdeen on the final day, and then a week later in the Final.

They've been a bit of a bogey side for me, popping up with the odd victory, so it could be tough.

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Matchday #34 2031/32

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We had a 93rd minute goal ruled out for a dodgy as f**k offside call. Conspiracy.

Neither Hearts or Celtic gaining points is good though, as time is ticking out now.

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A win over Celtic would've been huge. Still feel like I'll need them to drop points if I'm to win this.

Next round of fixtures?

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Celtic v Hearts is on the Sunday, and could see Hearts removed from the race.

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Matchday #35 2031/32

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We've done our part.

Lets see who slits the others throat the day after...

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Perfect. Absolutely fucking perfect.

Table now looks beautiful.

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Five points clear with 3 games left. Hearts officially out of the race.

My arse is twitching like a rabbits nose.

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At home to a Hearts side with nothing to play for, it could put us 8pts clear.

Obviously that means Celtic would have to win their game the day after.

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Imagine the carnage if Celtic lose the title at Ibrox.

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Matchday #36 2031/32

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Looked like we'd blown it, they absolutely battered us in the second half.

Up stepped Benji Heath, trusty old dog making his 265th appearnace for the club, but only his 18th of an injury ravaged campaign. Beat three men then papped a pinpoint through ball for Jones, who tapped it in.

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8pts clear.

Celtic have to beat Rangers at Ibrox, or I've won the league.

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Matchday #36 2031/32 cont...

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Oh. You. Fucker.

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We cannot be caught. Probably the lowest points tally of any title win in this save, but f**k it. We've done it.

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Beautiful.

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Their run is over.

UnfoldedWhimsicalBabirusa-size_restricte

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The sun sets over McDiarmid Park, 9th May 2032.

Home of the Scottish Premiership Champions. Home of legends.

Edited by RandomGuy.
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Final fixtures 2031/32

Almost ended the thread there and then, but decided to continue it. I can't end on a high, so an inevitable slump that leads to my sacking is a more fitting end.

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Chucked in fringe players and youngsters. My CM pairing v Aberdeen were 16yo and 17yo.

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Confirmation we're Champions.

Hamilton will be replaced by Dundee United.

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St Johnstone Squad review 2031/32

Goalkeepers

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Willamson got a game against Rangers so he could get a medal.

Defenders

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Young players done well enough, but aren't reliable enough to start yet.

Finneran is away back to Arsenal, who intend to "give him a chance".

Midfielders

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Bruno predominently played CB, and will join us for nothing this Summer.

Tosic has agreed a deal with Sporting Lisbon.

Meunier will be back on loan.

Rest is fine tbh, Clark has broke through and thats pleasing, while Johnston looks capable back up. Two good youth prospects coming good.

Strikers

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I'll need better back up for Henrique next season.

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Also, new season, new "vision".

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Apparently I have the best youth system in the world, somehow.

Nice to see the new stadium is back on the agenda, it was in a "planning" stage for years, then vanished when the new owners came in.

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And the very next day?

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Means we'll have the 3rd biggest stadium in the country behind Celtic Park, Ibrox and Hampden. 

Aberdeen, Hearts and Hibs all around 20k.

Gives me debt though...

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... but it seems manageable enough. £3.6m a year, which is less than the net profit I usually make from transfers each season.

A big sale, like Henrique for ~£30m, can always get me out a rut if I end up stuck.

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