Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 5 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Well maybe, if you hadn't posted the video of Mozza's own goal.. Karma. I hope Johnny is keeping an eye out for a bloke who looks like he owns a mortgage-free house in the country and a nice pension hanging around the front door of Soccerworld. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 I haven't met either oaksoft or johnnydun but I'd be lumping big on a victory for the dee lad, oaksoft is all talk. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 8 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Well maybe, if you hadn't posted the video of Mozza's own goal.. This one? dd8-b-2019-09-13-20-25-48.mp4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 4 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Karma. I hope Johnny is keeping an eye out for a bloke who looks like he owns a mortgage-free house in the country and a nice pension hanging around the front door of Soccerworld. I might accidentally mistake him for @Granny Danger and take a hiding from the wrong arsehole. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 6 minutes ago, The Moonster said: I haven't met either oaksoft or johnnydun but I'd be lumping big on a victory for the dee lad, oaksoft is all talk. Phree munay! Game's a bogey! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 14 minutes ago, johnnydun said: This one? dd8-b-2019-09-13-20-25-48.mp4 5.14 MB · 12 downloads Yes Soccerworld, Dundee, Old Glamis Rd, Dundee DD3 8LF 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Just now, Melanius Mullarkey said: Yes Soccerworld, Dundee, Old Glamis Rd, Dundee DD3 8LF Bring yer Baw! 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Another theatre one - The lead actor had to answer a phone in a scene where he was to be given the news that his wife had been killed in a tragic accident. This was just a dead phone line but on the last night we hooked it up so when he answered the phone, one of the wardrobe girls could speak to him. The audience saw him answer the phone and react accordingly, “Oh no, that’s terrible” etc whilst the girl on the other end was saying she was going to sit on his face, suck his cock then f**k his brains out. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AyrTroopMajor Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Old guy at my work used to go around screwing a tiny whole into the side of people's cans of juice, so that every time someone lifted the can to take a drink, juice would go all over the person's shirt and they would sit there absolutely baffled thinking that they had missed their mouth. So then they would take another drink. Same result. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 2 minutes ago, AyrTroopMajor said: Old guy at my work used to go around screwing a tiny whole into the side of people's cans of juice, so that every time someone lifted the can to take a drink, juice would go all over the person's shirt and they would sit there absolutely baffled thinking that they had missed their mouth. So then they would take another drink. Same result. Shaking unattended, unopened cans never gets old. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Not really a prank, but I used to swap out my lukewarm cans of juice for other people's that had been left in the fridge for hours. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotty Tunbridge Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 If you wet brown paper towels, tear them in strips, then squish them together in the palms of your hands for about 10 seconds, the result is a realistic jobbie. We did this once in the guys toilets but sat the fake jobbies on the cistern and the pan. Boys were up from England delivering and setting up new equipment. They each went in the bogs for 2 seconds max and came out not saying a thing until one guy came out and shouted "Oi, lads, some cant has fackin' left some ponies in there!" Stuff that amuses you when your 18 I suppose. 8mile likes this. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 (edited) On 12/02/2020 at 13:08, The Moonster said: My old PE teacher put a partially sighted boy in goals at school then proceeded to leather a penalty at him. The boy didn't see the ball at all, he just reacted to the bang of it hitting the wall about a foot from his head. The behaviour of an utter w****r. In a split-second and out-of-character moment of madness, I once threw a basketball in my (somewhat scary) PE teacher's face from point blank range, with some degree of force if I remember correctly. He was sitting down with his eyes focused on his register and said "[HC] pass me the ball", so I did. Instantly got sent to the changing rooms, possibly facing suspension (or worse) until I successfully played the 'I didn't know the sponge was meant to be wet' type card. In my defence, had he simply said "please" then the whole situation could have been completely averted. Also, if you ask for something, at least pay attention. That's my spiel for the pearly gates anyway. Edited February 13, 2020 by Hedgecutter 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 In a split-second and out-of-character moment of madness, I once threw a basketball in my (somewhat scary) PE teacher's face from point blank range, with some degree of force if I remember correctly. He was sitting down with his eyes focused on his register and said "[HC] pass me the ball", so I did. Instantly got sent to the changing rooms, possibly facing suspension (or worse) until I successfully played the 'I didn't know the sponge was meant to be wet' type card. In my defence, had he simply said "please" then the whole situation could have been completely averted. Also, if you ask for something, at least pay attention. That's my spiel for the pearly gates anyway.Hitting your teachers in the puss with things thread for this 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 1 hour ago, Hedgecutter said: In a split-second and out-of-character moment of madness, I once threw a basketball in my (somewhat scary) PE teacher's face from point blank range, with some degree of force if I remember correctly. He was sitting down with his eyes focused on his register and said "[HC] pass me the ball", so I did. Instantly got sent to the changing rooms, possibly facing suspension (or worse) until I successfully played the 'I didn't know the sponge was meant to be wet' type card. In my defence, had he simply said "please" then the whole situation could have been completely averted. Also, if you ask for something, at least pay attention. That's my spiel for the pearly gates anyway. I'm with you on this one Hedgecutter. PE teachers are all canutes and I have no doubt he deserved it. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 4 hours ago, johnnydun said: Bring yer Baw! @oaksoft Invitation. RSVP 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 6 hours ago, the snudge said: I worked in a hotel and there was a deaf housekeeper. One day she was hoovering the corridors. One of the maintainance guys switched off the thing at the plug. She obviously couldn't hear the hoover and continued on her way. Guests were looking a bit perplexed. 5 hours ago, KnightswoodBear said: Being fucking appalling to people at work thread for this. I just want to say that while I laughed out loud at this post and gave it a greeny, I'm not at all proud of myself for doing so. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 I put on a Russian accent and prank-called my boss on loudspeaker saying that I had just moved into the area and was looking for a job, while pretending to misunderstand everything she said. This conversation went on for about fifteen minutes before she realised that it was a prank call. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Hard to top this one. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 (edited) 8 hours ago, the snudge said: I worked in a hotel and there was a deaf housekeeper. Guest: I don't need the bathroom cleaned, just sheets for my bed. Deaf housekeeper: Guest requests "if I need the bathroom latrine, just sh*t on his bed" . No problem. Edited February 13, 2020 by Hedgecutter 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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