Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 Last time out, P&B decided to tell Donovan to GTF and go back to sleep. Catch up here: https://www.pieandbovril.com/forum/index.php?/topic/263984-killing-hitler-part-1-a-pb-choose-your-own-adventure/#comments Let's begin part 2! You have no time for Donovan's crazy ideas. Especially at 3AM on a workday. "Donovan, I'm not really interested in your tumble dryer..." you begin to protest. "But this is the biggest discovery of all time!" Donovan implores with bloodshot stoners eyes. "Imagine the possibilities! We can change history!" "Not at three in the morning" you open your front door and hope your cousin takes the hint. "Listen, Donovan. I'll pop round after work tomorrow, right?" you lied. "Just go home and sleep. And lay off the joints!" Donovan looked visibly disappointed. "You believe me, don't you? It really works!" he cried. "Good night Donovan!" you close the door on him and lock it for good measure. You sigh. What a waste of a mind your cousin is. He was top of all of his classes at school and looked set for a bright future - then he fell in love with Mary Jane and that was it. You climb back up the stairs through the dark and make your way back to bed. You struggle to settle again, as you are really annoyed that Donovan would wake you up at this time with such nonsense. You decide that you will actually pop round tomorrow - mainly to warn him to never do that again. You eventually drift off to sleep, until woken by the buzz of your alarm clock. You hit snooze, in a last ditch attempt to reclaim the precious time wasted by Donovan and his tumble dryer. After two snoozes you get up. You can hear the wind howling outside as you go downstairs to make yourself coffee and toast. Another miserable February day is beginning. "Maybe Vienna will have better weather" you think to yourself and chuckle. Maybe time travel wasn't such a bad idea after all? You shower, dress and head to work. Nothing unusual happens during the morning, and you manage to distract yourself from thoughts of tumble dryers. Until you check your phone on your lunch break. SIX missed calls. From Auntie Jane. Donovan's mother. You call her back. She answers on the second ring. "Hi Auntie Jane! Sorry I missed your calls, I'm at w-" She interrupts you, the concern of a mother in her voice. "Have you seen Donny?" "Not since..." you hesitate. "HAVE YOU SEEN HIM? HEARD FROM HIM?" she's beginning to sound hysterical. "He turned up at mine at 3 this morning talking nonsense, I sent him on his way". "I've been round to his flat to make sure the cat is fed, and he's not there. And he's not answering his phone!" You try to reassure her. "But you know what he's like, Auntie Jane. He'll be stoned in someone's house. Or sleeping." "I hope you're right. Well, let me know if you see him." "I will. Talk to you later Auntie Jane." She hangs up. You consider asking to leave work early because Donovan is missing. Your manager is sound so it shouldn't be a problem. What will you do? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 Get the keys off his auntie and go round and nick his stash. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 Are Mary Jane and Auntie Jane related? Starting to see where Donny gets his brains from. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bennett Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 Are you typing this out or copying it from elsewhere? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 3 minutes ago, bennett said: Are you typing this out or copying it from elsewhere? Making it up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 His name is Donovan, he can go f**k himself. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 Just now, Dele said: His name is Donovan, he can go f**k himself. He's your cousin though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 Just now, The Gypsy King said: He's your cousin though. I don't care much for family. They were thrust upon me unwittingly and shall be cut from life if they are named stuff like Gulliver, Donavon or Tarquin. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Steele Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 20 minutes ago, The Gypsy King said: "Donovan, I'm not really interested in your tumble dryer..." you begin to protest. "But this is the biggest discovery of all time!" Donovan implores with bloodshot stoners eyes. "Imagine the possibilities! We can change history!" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 25 minutes ago, The Gypsy King said: You decide that you will actually pop round tomorrow I never fuckin decided this, you did. Where was the option?? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 11 minutes ago, johnnydun said: I never fuckin decided this, you did. Where was the option?? I wield executive power over certain decisions. Otherwise we would be here forever. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 So Auntie Jane has wigged out because her son hasn't been seen in nine hours? This is the side of the family that doesn't get invited to gatherings, isn't it? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 Just now, BigFatTabbyDave said: So Auntie Jane has wigged out because her son hasn't been seen in nine hours? This is the side of the family that doesn't get invited to gatherings, isn't it? Aye basically. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 I reckon Donnie went back to kill young Hitler but got distracted by the legal coke and opium and will end giving hand jobs to brown shirts for phennigs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 2 minutes ago, welshbairn said: I reckon Donnie went back to kill young Hitler but got distracted by the legal coke and opium and will end giving hand jobs to brown shirts for phennigs. Donnie is @Sergeant Wilson?! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 6 minutes ago, welshbairn said: I reckon Donnie went back to kill young Hitler but got distracted by the legal coke and opium and will end giving hand jobs to brown shirts for phennigs. 3 minutes ago, Dele said: Donnie is @Sergeant Wilson?! There was a war on! We did what we had to. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 Fair dos. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 I'm loving P&B's masterly inactivity in this storyline. It's like we've all skipped ahead to the endings and realised every active choice ends with our character shagging Hitler. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oleksandr Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 We dicided against killing Hitler so shouldn't the title be changed? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 44 minutes ago, Oleksandr said: We dicided against killing Hitler so shouldn't the title be changed? The title is just a title mate. You know how Stephen King's IT has absolutely f**k all to do with computers? This is like that. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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