Coronavirus (COVID-19)

[resk]

Christ you’re stretching.  Probably why I rarely engage with you these days.
Yes when we are advised by the Scottish Government that non-essential businesses should/can return whilst following social distancing rules as far as is possible then we will do so.
I put the bit in bold/italic because that will be the best all industries can do.  It will not be 100% perfect in the majority of work environments.

That is already the case. You don't have to be doing "essential work" to be working right now.

[Wee Willie]

6 hours ago, tamthebam said:

If they are to extend the lockdown on VE day they could say "this has only been going on for two months. The Second World War lasted 6 years"

OK, so cinemas and restaurants weren't closed but there were restrictions and food rationing during the War 

 I got my malt extract, concentrated orange juice and cod liver oil nae bother.

6 hours ago, VladimirMooc said:

 Can’t really be arsed getting into the intricacies of a discussion about the Barnett formula with a man named Wee Willie from the internet. But the idea that Scotland currently gets an especially bad deal from it is drivel and the figures you cited on tax revenue have been pulled out your arse and/or the arse of another idiot. Again, I say this as a supporter of an independent Scotland.

I'm 5fit 4 and my names Willie. Whit's your excuse?

5 hours ago, Granny Danger said:

  Someone is desperate for a lockdown buddy.

Sorry I’m not that person, trying to educate you was fun while it lasted but it gets tedious after a while.

FWIW the only people I’d be happy to see dead en masse are Tories and QotS supporters; there’s probably a large crossover between those two.

I’ll give you the last word.

 

[Wee Willie]

Now for something completely different – from FaceBook

Apologies if this has been posted before but I cannae mind where I found this.

Are my testicles black?

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. 
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:

"Are - my - test - results - back?"

 

Surely worth a wee smile

[Granny Danger]

1 minute ago, resk said:

17 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:

Christ you’re stretching.  Probably why I rarely engage with you these days.
Yes when we are advised by the Scottish Government that non-essential businesses should/can return whilst following social distancing rules as far as is possible then we will do so.
I put the bit in bold/italic because that will be the best all industries can do.  It will not be 100% perfect in the majority of work environments.

That is already the case. You don't have to be doing "essential work" to be working right now.

No, but the Scottish Government advised that non-essential businesses should close.  In my personal experience most have.  

If they hadn’t the reduction in people interacting with other outwith their households would have been significantly higher than it was.  It’s logical, therefor, to assume that the ‘success’ of the lockdown in reducing the spread of the virus is largely down to this.

[Detournement]

31 minutes ago, NotThePars said:

He's married.

There's loads of married hair dressers. 

[Arch Stanton]

9 minutes ago, Wee Willie said:

Now for something completely different – from FaceBook

 

Apologies if this has been posted before but I cannae mind where I found this.

 

Are my testicles black?

 

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. 
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:

"Are - my - test - results - back?"

 

 

Surely worth a wee smile

Do you know where that might raise a wee smile?

1956

[Todd_is_God]

The SNP, unlike the Conservatives, need to be mindful of the fact there is an election next year.

If they take a different approach to the rest of the UK in easing lockdown restrictions, and get it wrong, support for them will dip.

The conservatives, however, are essentially bomb proof for the next 4 years whether they get the next 3-4 months right or wrong.

[Forest_Fifer]

Are you asking why the second wave of a pandemic virus would be worse than the first?
Why would that be particularly unusual?

No, I'm asking why, if we've had a first wave, it wasn't shown in the stats. Or are you claiming that the normal flu spike this winter was actually Covid-19?

[pawpar]

I think that the scottish government missed a trick with the Test Trace Isolate and Support (TTIS) strategy. Should have swapped Trace and Isolate over for shits and giggles.

[Todd_is_God]

6 minutes ago, Forest_Fifer said:

2 hours ago, Todd_is_God said:

Are you asking why the second wave of a pandemic virus would be worse than the first?
Why would that be particularly unusual?

No, I'm asking why, if we've had a first wave, it wasn't shown in the stats. Or are you claiming that the normal flu spike this winter was actually Covid-19?

I'm not claiming anything.

[ICTChris]

Is everyone going to download the NHS contact tracing app?

[jagfox]

 

[Granny Danger]

5 minutes ago, pawpar said:

I think that the scottish government missed a trick with the Test Trace Isolate and Support (TTIS) strategy. Should have swapped Trace and Isolate over for shits and giggles.

Test Isolate Trace Support would have won it with most on here.  Albert Mongoose could have done a supporting nurse image.

Edited May 4, 2020 by Granny Danger

[Forest_Fifer]

I'm not claiming anything.

You suggested that it was plausible that the first wave of covid 19 could have gone undetected during the normal flu season.

[Forest_Fifer]

None of that explains why a highly contageous but not overly deadly virus which kills from causing pneumonia could not have gone undetected during a time of year where flu and pneumonia related deaths are relatively common.
I'm not saying it did, only that it's plausible.

Indeed.

[Todd_is_God]

Just now, Forest_Fifer said:

3 minutes ago, Todd_is_God said:

I'm not claiming anything.

You suggested that it was plausible that the first wave of covid 19 could have gone undetected during the normal flu season.

I said it was plausible based on a couple of assumptions, yes.

But that's not me saying that is what happened.

Do you think that is plausible or implausible?

[Am Featha Taigh Nan Clach]

4 minutes ago, ICTChris said:

Is everyone going to download the NHS contact tracing app?

I will.

I want to return to some sort of normality ASAP (slightly selfishly as I am in a low risk age group with no underlying health conditions). I feel it's only right that I do my bit where possible to help lower the transmission rate.

[Bairnardo]

Is everyone going to download the NHS contact tracing app?

Absolutely, on the proviso that there are iron clad assurances about data usage and deletion post pandemic.

[Steven W]

8 minutes ago, ICTChris said:

Is everyone going to download the NHS contact tracing app?

Not convinced we'll have it in Scotland (at least not at the same time as England).

[Savage Henry]

They're basically becoming a test centre for the next strategy. Test, trace and isolate using a new App that apparently uses Bluetooth that doesn't drain your battery.

\

They were also promoted to third in line questioner after the BBC and ITV.