gannonball Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 1 hour ago, paranoid android said: Still hopeful. @virginton alias found. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 Mine is growing back. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wellinwigan Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 One time at Caravan Club 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 17 year old, despite probably not being all that old for it I decided to get the monkey off my back* before it became a monkey, so rather than waiting around for someone I actually wanted to pump, I just nailed some absolute fucking munter. She was awful, the experience was awful, but it felt like a needs must scenario. *If there was an actual monkey, it probably would have been a preferable option. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8MileBU Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 Mine is growing back.^^^ This! [emoji20] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lofarl Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 3 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: Lunchtime at high school, not on school grounds. The younger sister, who unexpectedly went home for lunch too, walked in on us with a surprising lack of surprise and simply said "It smells in here, open the window once you've finished otherwise mum will be angry". Of course, like any good aspiring student should do, I cut the event short, had a quick shower and went back to school in good time for classwork with the promise of returning back later. However, school was then then immediately followed by a trip home on the school bus (free) rather than a return to the scene of earlier events, which would have seen me have to fork out for a public bus home later on1. This of course was a mistake as I had to reply to a series of somewhat disgruntled messages at a time when limited-character texts cost 12p a time, hence I eventually ran out of credit2 and then got accused of ignoring her. Footnotes: Reveal hidden contents 1 Some may consider this to be 'tight-fisted', but one should note that I never got any pocket money and my only source of income was a Sunday paper round. Therefore if you consider that I was saving what was half a weeks wage by getting that school bus home, suddenly it doesn't sound as bad. This also saved what would have been a third shower in one day3. 2 see 1 above. If I remember correctly, Vodaphone only sold cards in £10 bundles or more, and I wasn't going to be discussing sexy time using the non-private landline in my dining room with my own family around. 3 In retrospect, this was the environmentally responsible option. Had the rest of you been as green back in the day then we might not be in the current mess. Stopped reading there after I noticed you support Brechin. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 14. Bowling green at my maws bit. I was such a wee slag as a teen 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 5 minutes ago, Honest Saints Fan said: 14. Bowling green at my maws bit. I was such a wee slag as a teen This could be a pun record! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 7 minutes ago, Honest Saints Fan said: 14. Bowling green at my maws bit. I was such a wee slag as a teen Something about the number of ends...…………………….. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 1 minute ago, Zen Archer Esq. said: Something about the number of ends...…………………….. ...good length... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 2 hours ago, Honest Saints Fan said: 14. Bowling green at my maws bit. I was such a wee slag as a teen Spoiler sorry HSF, I just couldn't resist posting that. Unless it was actually Tatty Marshall who did the deed.... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 This is the story of losing my virginity, I held my breath and the bed held a trinity, Friends I'm making no claims to a mystery, Sometimes I feel like my sex life's all history, It's over and done with.. actually that was The Proclaimers. Mine was to an older wifie down by the banks of the Tweed. Top shagger me. Not. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted November 6, 2019 Share Posted November 6, 2019 (edited) I was 14, under a railway bridge near Windygates to an older woman of 15. She thought I was very good and experienced, I told her I'd been studying the subject academically for a number of years. ETA - it was a Thursday night and we missed ToTP Edited November 6, 2019 by NewBornBairn 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 8 hours ago, paranoid android said: Still hopeful. Thanks for the PMs, guys - will be in touch. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 My neighbour’s school chum. I was only 11 or 12. She was a little bit older.I found out 7 or 8 years later that her dad was an alcoholic and she had a really hard childhood when I knew her. Older men used to come round to her house and shag her.A number of years ago she set her home on fire to try and kill herself. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LondonHMFC Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 18 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 Christ, that last one wasn't very uplifting. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 Right up there with the shitting stories thread this. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted November 7, 2019 Share Posted November 7, 2019 Knee deep in clunge since I was 15 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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