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Tales of P&B Past


Torpar

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2 minutes ago, Thistle_do_nicely said:

All morning I killed cows

Worst job - worked in a slaughterhouse in Guildford when I was a teenager.

I was given a sledgehammer and told to crack the cow's skulls with it. When I asked about bolt guns they laughed and said they didn't have anything so modern.

All morning I killed cows.

If you didn't swing the sledgehammer hard enough, the cow went fuckin' nuts and tried to break the crush. Hit the thing too hard and the sledgehammer smashed the skull and you got covered in brains. By lunchtime I was knackered, but when I got to the canteen everybody stood up and applauded.

Turned out they were having a laugh with the new guy and I could have been using a bolt gun. I walked out and never went back. 

Didn't even ask for wages.  

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4 minutes ago, YassinMoutaouakil said:

Supras claiming to be a lecturer at the London School of Economics when he was about 17.

Supras showed up to the 5s one year (when he was at his peak annoying level) and flat out wouldn't talk to or make eye contact with anyone, almost looking scared. He'd completely flat out deny he was Supras despite there being several St. Mirren fans taking part in the 5s who knew who he was.

It was funny, as he slunk into a pint, wouldn't actually look at anyone and just kept his head down as if folk were going to give him aggro. He sat there for about 2 hours with a couple of other lads and wouldn't actually move from the table. Completely bizarre behaviour.

The question was, why would you even bother showing up to something like that if you thought folk were going to have a go at you? 

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Guest Moomintroll
 
Yeah, I got sucked into that one along with several others.
The cun'ts probably retired to the Bahamas now.
Chucked some coin into that appeal too, was the price of a couple of pints so wasn't too bothered that I may have been whooshed. Would rather help someone than be a heartless, cynical c**t.
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BustaNut sending a Facebook friend request to my stepdaughter who instantly blocked him before asking me why one some creepy guy who claimed to know me off a football forum was trying to sleaze on her. 

Edited by Flybhoy
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1 minute ago, djchapsticks said:

Supras showed up to the 5s one year (when he was at his peak annoying level) and flat out wouldn't talk to or make eye contact with anyone, almost looking scared. He'd completely flat out deny he was Supras despite there being several St. Mirren fans taking part in the 5s who knew who he was.

It was funny, as he slunk into a pint, wouldn't actually look at anyone and just kept his head down as if folk were going to give him aggro. He sat there for about 2 hours with a couple of other lads and wouldn't actually move from the table. Completely bizarre behaviour.

The question was, why would you even bother showing up to something like that if you thought folk were going to have a go at you? 

That sounds incredibly on brand tbh. I'd be too feart to meet up at any sort of P&B event for fear of getting battered and I'm only a fraction of the c**t Supras was. I'm genuinely surprised he turned up in the first place and equally shocked he escaped unscathed. 

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1 minute ago, YassinMoutaouakil said:

That sounds incredibly on brand tbh. I'd be too feart to meet up at any sort of P&B event for fear of getting battered and I'm only a fraction of the c**t Supras was. I'm genuinely surprised he turned up in the first place and equally shocked he escaped unscathed. 

I'm the same. Although I'm generally not a people person anyways so definitely wouldn't escape unscathed.

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11 minutes ago, YassinMoutaouakil said:

Who was the boy that supported East Fife (I think) that would be totally normal when talking about football but when you clicked on his other posts it was full of tentacle porn?  :lol:

King Kebab??!?!!!!???!!!!

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Only thing I remember that hasnt been mentioned is the boy who had about 80,000 posts, and every single one was in Word Association. I'm sure he was banned somehow and I have to wonder how he now spends his days.

Theres always a chance he was an incredibly determined, and pointlessly single minded, bot I suppose.

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7 minutes ago, YassinMoutaouakil said:

That sounds incredibly on brand tbh. I'd be too feart to meet up at any sort of P&B event for fear of getting battered and I'm only a fraction of the c**t Supras was. I'm genuinely surprised he turned up in the first place and equally shocked he escaped unscathed. 

Believe me, bigger c***s than you showed up to these things and there was never any shite at them. :lol:  There was never any danger of him getting hassle...KeithGY even said to him to come over and have a pint (but not share a pint, that's another thing altogether) with a few of us and he sort of kept his head low and mumbled 'no, it's OK'.

Half of Fife (Kirkcaldy, mainly - no harm Zen) even turned up one year for a big day out to the big lights and no-one even bothered their arse as they marvelled at such delights as electricity and running water and revelled in the wonderous haven of the upstairs bit of Walkabout. Was like watching a live action, en-masse rendition of California Man. Then Philpy did the slug.

Edited by djchapsticks
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Just now, RandomGuy. said:

Only thing I remember that hasnt been mentioned is the boy who had about 80,000 posts, and every single one was in Word Association. I'm sure he was banned somehow and I have to wonder how he now spends his days.

Not posting anywhere else, I've always wondered how they got themselves banned.

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Just now, RandomGuy. said:

Only thing I remember that hasnt been mentioned is the boy who had about 80,000 posts, and every single one was in Word Association. I'm sure he was banned somehow and I have to wonder how he now spends his days.

Theres always a chance he was an incredibly determined, and pointlessly single minded, bot I suppose.

He was raging after wasteland.

Everyone answering his words with 'bot'. 

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I'm defintley going to activate some sort of spam filter on this thread by remembering something new every 20 seconds.

NDD's headsgones threads on the Premiership forum were great craic for a while. Think they were a weekly thing?

 

 

 [/ spoiler]

Edited by YassinMoutaouakil
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