Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
D.A.F.C

Top Five Generalisations About Scottish Football Teams

Recommended Posts

Hearts are physical and have a big black guy upfront.

Hibs are hilariously inconsistent 

Rangers have had at least one scumbag type player since forever

ICT always score late goals against the run of play

Falkirk fans think they’re Real Madrid

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A transfer to the OF means a Scotland call up

Celtic are a vehicle for bigots

Rangers are a vehicle for bigots

Most Cat 1 refs (as they are disproportionately from the West... 24/32 last season) will favour one or other of the OF

And for balance...

Aberdeen always play a big blonde lad up front

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, RR #1 said:

Dunfermline are shite

Raith fans can't count as high as five

St Johnstone fans all drive tractors to games

Aberdeen fans view sheep for leisure and not agricultural purposes

Dundee fans continually make a fuss about not viewing St Johnstone as a rival, but we all know they really care - like your older brother being bigger and stronger through childhood, but when you grow up and put him on his arse he's not really sure what to do, so constantly refers to that time he beat you up years ago

Falkirk fans will turn any conversation into a crowd w**k (also see: Dundee fans)

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, D.A.F.C said:

Falkirk fans think they’re Real Madrid

Always knew they were heavy into a crowd w**k but didn't know this was a thing until they crashed into the L1 forum. Bizarre.

Talk of "The Falkirk way" and "always having one player you'd pay to watch".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 10/10/2019 at 10:14, deej said:

Raith fans can't count as high as five

St Johnstone fans all drive tractors to games

Aberdeen fans view sheep for leisure and not agricultural purposes

Dundee fans continually make a fuss about not viewing St Johnstone as a rival, but we all know they really care - like your older brother being bigger and stronger through childhood, but when you grow up and put him on his arse he's not really sure what to do, so constantly refers to that time he beat you up years ago

Falkirk fans will turn any conversation into a crowd w**k (also see: Dundee fans)

 

Scrambling to make your team have a relevance type post.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 10/10/2019 at 17:14, deej said:

Dundee fans continually make a fuss about not viewing St Johnstone as a rival, but we all know they really care - like your older brother being bigger and stronger through childhood, but when you grow up and put him on his arse he's not really sure what to do, so constantly refers to that time he beat you up years ago

 

 

unnamed (18).gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1. Celtic are held back in Europe by the lack of domestic competition.

2. Rangers* are held back in Europe by the lack of domestic competition.

3. Hearts and Hibs should merge in order to give Celtic and Rangers* more competition.

4. Dundee and Dundee Utd should merge in order to give Celtic and Rangers* more competition.

5. Celtic and Rangers* Colt teams should be entered in the SPFL Premiership thus providing more competition for Celtic and Rangers* as well as guaranteeing Scotland qualification to WC and EC Finals.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Raith / Morton are quasi-seaside league times in denial, reflected by the nature of their quasi-seaside towns that their club names attempt to disassociate with.

Partick are the club for the more sound and intellectual citizens of Glasgow.

Fort William consist of players that couldn't make the cut at shinty. 

Gala Fairydean consist of players that couldn't make the cut at rugby. 

Caledonian Braves & BSC Glasgow are simply fictional names that appear in the Sunday papers and don't actually exist in real life.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Motherwell being full of hammerthrowers. For about a season and a half we were comically agricultural but in the time I've watched us we've been soft as shit far more often than we have hard b*****ds.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...