Jump to content

Celebrity c***s


Recommended Posts

An idea shamelessly stolen from an occasional feature in the Viz.

Using the term 'celebrity' quite loosely here...

Former Big Brother winner Anthony Hutton, the Geordie guy with the lamb chop sideburns was on Morrisons in Stirling one day (he used to be part of some touring dance troupe and often was in the Fubar in the town with it), my then five year old daughter said, quite star struck... "Hey, you're Anthony off Big Brother?"

To which he replied "Aye..." rolled his eyes, farted very loudly and walked away.....ignorant c**t.

Former Hearts striker Calum Elliott was in a nightclub in Edinburgh I was in with my wife at the time, round the period he got a handful of first team games and totally OTT praise from journalists, we were standing on a stairwell between levels chatting to someone when he and a bunch of goons brushed past, he promptly necked the drink he had and dropped his glass on the steps where it smashed instantly, much to the amusement of his and his idiot crowd of mates, c**t.

Former St Mirren goalkeeper Campbell Money once called me a p***k when I was about 12, although to be fair he may have had a point. 

What A list or Z list celebrities have you encountered and found to be utter c***s...?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Flybhoy said:

An idea shamelessly stolen from an occasional feature in the Viz.

Using the term 'celebrity' quite loosely here...

Former Big Brother winner Anthony Hutton, the Geordie guy with the lamb chop sideburns was on Morrisons in Stirling one day (he used to be part of some touring dance troupe and often was in the Fubar in the town with it), my then five year old daughter said, quite star struck... "Hey, you're Anthony off Big Brother?"

To which he replied "Aye..." rolled his eyes, farted very loudly and walked away.....ignorant c**t.

Former Hearts striker Calum Elliott was in a nightclub in Edinburgh I was in with my wife at the time, round the period he got a handful of first team games and totally OTT praise from journalists, we were standing on a stairwell between levels chatting to someone when he and a bunch of goons brushed past, he promptly necked the drink he had and dropped his glass on the steps where it smashed instantly, much to the amusement of his and his idiot crowd of mates, c**t.

Former St Mirren goalkeeper Campbell Money once called me a p***k when I was about 12, although to be fair he may have had a point. 

What A list or Z list celebrities have you encountered and found to be utter c***s...?

Originally read that as your five yr old was in a nightclub.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, bennett said:

Originally read that as your five yr old was in a nightclub.

 

Yeah the enclosed brackets distinguishing the nightclub from the supermarket is the clue there, understandable you wouldn't be able to get that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

An idea shamelessly stolen from an occasional feature in the Viz.
Using the term 'celebrity' quite loosely here...
Former Big Brother winner Anthony Hutton, the Geordie guy with the lamb chop sideburns was on Morrisons in Stirling one day (he used to be part of some touring dance troupe and often was in the Fubar in the town with it), my then five year old daughter said, quite star struck... "Hey, you're Anthony off Big Brother?"
To which he replied "Aye..." rolled his eyes, farted very loudly and walked away.....ignorant c**t.
Former Hearts striker Calum Elliott was in a nightclub in Edinburgh I was in with my wife at the time, round the period he got a handful of first team games and totally OTT praise from journalists, we were standing on a stairwell between levels chatting to someone when he and a bunch of goons brushed past, he promptly necked the drink he had and dropped his glass on the steps where it smashed instantly, much to the amusement of his and his idiot crowd of mates, c**t.
Former St Mirren goalkeeper Campbell Money once called me a p***k when I was about 12, although to be fair he may have had a point. 
What A list or Z list celebrities have you encountered and found to be utter c***s...?


Doubt this even happened tbh, but absolutely greetin’ with laughter nonetheless! [emoji23]

Was it a long tromboney one or a short, sharp angry blast?

“Aye...”

Prrrrrrrmmmp!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 minutes ago, Flybhoy said:

Yeah the enclosed brackets distinguishing the nightclub from the supermarket is the clue there, understandable you wouldn't be able to get that.

Put your claws away Mags, it wasn't a dig.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Seriously though, a couple of years ago, I was at the golf tournament in Abu Dhabi, went for the practise days etc... I’m not too interested in golf, but the guy I was working with at the time was a huge enthusiast.
We met all the top players, had beers with a few of them.
On the Saturday, James Mccavoy was in the bar at the 18th. As I’m very fond of the novel & movie Filth, I said to James “hi, nice to see you James” he said “I’m not who you think I am, so f**k off”
Celebrity c**t!























Turned out it was the lad from About a boy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, Brother Blades said:

Seriously though, a couple of years ago, I was at the golf tournament in Abu Dhabi, went for the practise days etc... I’m not too interested in golf, but the guy I was working with at the time was a huge enthusiast.
We met all the top players, had beers with a few of them.
On the Saturday, James Mccavoy was in the bar at the 18th. As I’m very fond of the novel & movie Filth, I said to James “hi, nice to see you James” he said “I’m not who you think I am, so f**k off”
Celebrity c**t!























Turned out it was the lad from About a boy.

Being as he didn't know you from Adam, he would have been quite right to respond to your casual familiarity and space invasion in the way he did, even if it was James.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't think I've ever had any bad experiences with 'celebrities'. Definitely not footballers, any I've ever had an interaction with are usually spot on for the few seconds/minutes we spoke. It's the folk I've known who have become 'famous' that turned into arseholes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Dele said:

Don't think I've ever had any bad experiences with 'celebrities'. Definitely not footballers, any I've ever had an interaction with are usually spot on for the few seconds/minutes we spoke. It's the folk I've known who have become 'famous' that turned into arseholes.

You can't leave it hanging like that. More info needed.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Neil Oliver - that utter bellend from the Coast program - was an utter twat to some sweet old ladies in St.Monans in Fife. We were on holiday and our cottage was on the front road. We were outside getting ready to head out for the day and before I saw him I heard one of the sweet old dears say something like, " Hello Mr Oliver, are you filming here today?" The utter nob-end brushed her off with: " I'm on holiday" and walked straight past. Now, I, along with the entire country, couldn't stand him anyway but that was well out of order. I also saw him a couple of years later at the Kings Theatre before a panto and I can confirm that he didn't wash his hands after going to the bog. Minger!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

At the last minute, Noele Gordon demanded a £2000 fee for attending a charity fete that my mum organised.

Now there's a name that won't have shown up on the Strumpets of Yore thread yet.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

At the last minute, Noele Gordon demanded a £2000 fee for attending a charity fete that my mum organised.

Now there's a name that won't have shown up on the Strumpets of Yore thread yet.

And I hope it never does!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

At the last minute, Noele Gordon demanded a £2000 fee for attending a charity fete that my mum organised.

Now there's a name that won't have shown up on the Strumpets of Yore thread yet.

Think you're safe there. From 1951..

noele-gordon-and-birthday-cake-humpty-du

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I once asked Lenny Henry for his autograph at the Festival years ago (yes, Lenny Henry. I know but I was young and foolish). I got it but he was a grumpy c*nt.

Wish I'd just done what my mate's Hearts supporting brother did to a Saint Johnstone player once- asked him for his autograph, got it, looked at the piece of paper, said "Oh, so that's who you are", screwed up the bit of paper and walked away.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

I once asked Lenny Henry for his autograph at the Festival years ago (yes, Lenny Henry. I know but I was young and foolish). I got it but he was a grumpy c*nt.

I know a taxi driver who had to pick him up from Whitehall Theatre years ago. It was near midnight and Lenny Henry come out and refused to get in his taxi and demanded a limousine for his 10 minute journey. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...