Jump to content
MixuFixit

Infuriating things your parents do

Recommended Posts

My dad brought me up as a Thistle fan.

We're catholic. And lived just outside of Glasgow. There is already a team for people like us. They win things, and play in Europe.

Baffling behaviour. :rolleyes:

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, throbber said:

I did go on a little bit more than I intended to there.

Understatement of the year! :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Understatement of the year! :lol:


It’s quite hard to hold back on the details when you have someone like that as a father figure!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fucking hell throbbs, that's mental. I was howling with laughter whilst at the same time cringing myself inside out. 

Your old man sounds like a cross between David Brent and Colin the office joker from the Fast Show.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, throbber said:

 


It’s quite hard to hold back on the details when you have someone like that as a father figure!

 

I'd say there are a lot worse than him about, tbh.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My dad slurps his coffee very Loudly. He also mutes the TV when the adverts come on, fair enough, but he insists that we mute our TV when he visits us, which is a bit rude.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Fucking hell throbbs, that's mental. I was howling with laughter whilst at the same time cringing myself inside out. 
Your old man sounds like a cross between David Brent and Colin the office joker from the Fast Show.


You literally can’t compare him to anything, he is a fucking roaster. In 1997 he got my sister (who was 12 at the time) a scanner for her Christmas. I actually can’t think of a single normal thing he ever did in his life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, throbber said:

 


You literally can’t compare him to anything, he is a fucking roaster. In 1997 he got my sister (who was 12 at the time) a scanner for her Christmas. I actually can’t think of a single normal thing he ever did in his life.

 

A scanner :lol:

Get a book written and sit back and watch the millions pour in.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, DA Baracus said:

A scanner :lol:

Get a book written and sit back and watch the millions pour in.

Something like Mommie Dearest?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I’m sitting in the beer garden of a Denver brewpub, almost crying with laughter at the antics of Throbber Mk1.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I want throbber to provide us with a full list of birthday and Christmas presents his dad got him and his sister since the scanner

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, philpy said:

My dad slurps his coffee very Loudly. He also mutes the TV when the adverts come on, fair enough, but he insists that we mute our TV when he visits us, which is a bit rude.

Does he leave it muted until prompted to turn the sound back on some minutes into the programme? Because my Dad does.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

my mum is now pretty much stone deaf. It is apparent to everyone except her. Doctors without exception are all "awfae quietly spoken". Telly can't be watched without subtitles as "they whisper and murmur all the time". That includes newsreaders, commentators and excitable audience members. 

Phone calls are largely ignored as there is something wrong with the volume on both the landline and her mobile. 

Pleas to get a hearing aid are dismissed - "my hearing is fine, its you". When I have to repeat something 6 or 7 times and I get exasperated, she informs me that she can hear my brother's wife absolutely fine as she doesn't "mumble". Brother's wife informs me that she literally shouts at my mum when talking.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, throbber said:

 


You literally can’t compare him to anything, he is a fucking roaster. In 1997 he got my sister (who was 12 at the time) a scanner for her Christmas. I actually can’t think of a single normal thing he ever did in his life.

 

My mate, on his 14th birthday, from his mum, got a chess set and a shelf. Still guffawing about it well over a decade later.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, throbber said:

 


Don’t recall any other weird presents, I remember another funny one from about 2011 when I was 24 and living at home and doing work not far from the house on a couple of projects. I was working with this absolutely gormless 16 year old apprentice, he was properly stupid and lacked any confidence whatsoever and most my days at work were spent with me getting more and more annoyed at him and his constant stupidity but I was told to persevere with him regardless. Anyway, I stopped in at the house at 10 o clock for my tea break as I did fairly often if in between jobs and took the apprentice into the house with me (occasionally if he had annoyed me too much in the morning I would have told him to stay in the van). We entered the house via french doors that had to be unlocked by a key that was kept under the decking, the doors open up into a small hallway in between our kitchen/dining room and our kitchen was sharp to the left. Our kitchen had a breakfast bar that sat at a 90 degree angle from the work top and stood at the breakfast bar was my dad totally naked making himself some coffee. Now if he had been observant in any way he could have heard the van pull up, could have heard us walking on the decking and certainly should have heard me unlocking the french doors in time for him to have made a run out of the kitchen and back upstairs to get changed but he was just stood there completely in his own world and only noticed we were there when we entered the room, both me and the apprentice frozen on the spot with no idea where to look. Considering we had already seen his arse he could have easily scurried off to the far side of the breakfast bar and then faced us and the situation would be somewhat less awkward but in a blind panic he shuffled into the corner of where the breakfast bar met the work top with his arse still facing us, he then in a desperate attempt to rid the situation of any further awkwardness turned his head to us and said in a rather strange and seductive manner “hello boys”. I physically grabbed the young apprentice and made a run back to the van, drove about a mile up the road and had my breakfast in a lay by in complete silence. I don’t think the young lad really appreciated what had gone on, he seems to have grown up and come out of his shell a bit in recent years going by his Facebook updates so I may one day ask him how he felt about the events of that morning. I haven’t spoke to my dad about it and probably never will.

 

Now that was worth reading! :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My old man is an interesting character, we actually get on very well, but at times I do think wonder what the f**k is going through his head. 

He buys a lot of shite, when I lived with them it wasn't uncommon to see the delivery fella twice a day. My parents moved house last year, and I went up to help them, in the garage he had over 1000 cans of fruit cocktail. He hoards almost everything, he has over 100 jackets, 300 watches and about 5 bikes. He rarely leaves the house, preferring to sit in and top up his stock in the aforementioned items. The garage in their new place is just filled with boxes of old newspapers, football programmes, turf from Wembley which is fucking rotten but he refuses to chuck it out, the bikes, teddy bears and toys from my youth and other bits of shit that he won't get rid of. 

He is also a very proud Scot, but to an excessive level (not quite Terrorism, but I really wouldn't put it past him). He is obsessed by Independence, and will take an opportunity to have a go at anything South of the border. For example that girl who was jumping all over the ambulance during the World Cup, when he found out she was from Scotland I thought he was going to try and look for her family tree. He will ring if the Tories have had a shocker (most days at the minute) and ask me what the mood is like down here "nobody cares Dad", "That's a shame, was hoping it would be anarchy". It's got to the stage where if he was told he could have independence but everybody residing in England would die, including his only child (that I know of) he would definitely take the deal.  

Secondly once he has made an opinion on a footballer, he is unable to change it. He will nit pick absolutely anything about them. For the past year or so it has been Andy Robertson. So if Robertson has a howler or Liverpool/Scotland lose I will have an email within a few minutes gleefully tearing him apart. I say email as he never texts, he just won't do it, would rather put on his laptop and send an email than replying to a message on his phone. 

Here are a couple of his replies to my emails about Robertson. 

 

 

 

 

Robbo1.png

Robbo2.png

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Not my parents but my wife's Dad is something else. Was quite worried about meeting him as I was concerned that we'd have nothing in common. I work as a nurse and he's a florist.

First time I met him he was clearly unimpressed with me - he didn't like my job and basically anything which I did wasn't good enough for him.  His cat seemed to absolutely hate me as well :lol: 

I didn't really help myself though. A family game of volleyball saw me injure my now sister in law (was a cracking shot in fairness) and I managed to knacker their toilet which caused a rather disgusting flood.  Fairly sure he thinks I'm a pothead also.

Anyway long story short he made me sit a lie detector test before he would let me in to the families 'circle of trust' which I just about managed to pass. 

I won't even get started on what happened when he met my parents.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...