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Infuriating things your parents do

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4 hours ago, Granny Danger said:

All you people should just f**k off and be grateful for all your parents have had to put up with , and in some cases are still putting up with.

Ungrateful bunch of tossers.

 

 

4 hours ago, Granny Danger said:

Is that the best you can come up with?  That's pathetic.

:lol:

What a spectacular heads gone reaction to a light-hearted thread. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you should blindly ignore any minor, and funny, annoying habits/quirks they have.

I’m assuming your offspring have made it explicitly clear that they think you’re a bitter old c**t and this has opened some old wounds to provoke these posts.

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18 minutes ago, Dee Man said:

Parents aren't beyond criticism just because they happen to be your parents. I doubt the Philpott or the West's kids would be shy in getting tore into their parents shortcomings. Assuming they were all alive of course. 

Don't say that.

2018-12-14-17-06-15--1838522657.jpeg

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My mum never used to make any noise when moving around the house and her suddenly appearing in my bedroom did lead to more than one embarrassing incident in my teens. Nowadays she's about 3 stone heavier and drinks a lot so much easier to locate when we go to visit.

Edited by Tony Ferrino
Jj

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1 minute ago, Tony Ferrino said:

My mum never used to make any noise when moving around the house and her suddenly appearing in my bedroom did lead to more than one embarrassing incident. Nowadays she's about 3 stone heavier and drinks a lot so much easier to locate when we go to visit.

Can't you w**k in your own house nowadays?

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1 hour ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

Get them a matching pair of these for Christmas.

 

6370BB43-69DF-4760-9378-0DB6414FC57E.jpeg

Her tits must be down by her knees,

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6 minutes ago, Tony Ferrino said:

My mum never used to make any noise when moving around the house and her suddenly appearing in my bedroom did lead to more than one embarrassing incident in my teens. Nowadays she's about 3 stone heavier and drinks a lot so much easier to locate when we go to visit.

Is that how she's coped with what she witnessed?

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Could write a few for my mum but in her defence she is female and it's to be expected.

 

My dad doesn't have any I can think of bar one. He was always a living day Scrooge when my brother and I were growing up. Since having a grandchild he's now a big kid at Xmas. More petty than infuriating though.

 

 

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Maw Sanchez drinks copious amounts of tea. Rather than put the cleaned, rinsed cup upside down on the draining board between uses, it sits on a folded bit of kitchen towel on the counter next to the draining board. The bit of counter is about four by four inches, right next to the kettle and toaster. I don't know why.

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Both of mine are off to wherever people go when they die so no fear of them reading any of this. But, when they were alive...

1. Keeping the house at a temperature which would've had Satan himself begging for an ice lolly.
1b. Complaining incessantly about the cost of heating.

2. Thinking that compliments or praise were a sign of weakness. It really didn't matter what I achieved, from schoolwork, to athletics to anything else, they would always find fault somewhere. I once finished top of the class in art. The first time I'd ever come close to finishing top of the class in anything. I quite literally ran home from school to tell them to be met with "Never mind art, when are you going to come top of the class in maths or physics! (Answer: Never) Who cares about art!" What's frustrating about that one is I really did have a talent for art as a teenager and who knows where it might've led. The pair of them made sure to knock it out of me though and I was well into middle age before I attempted to draw or paint again.

3. Having the car radio permanently tuned to Radio 2. Being trapped in a Hillman Avenger for hours on Sunday afternoon drives along with 2 detestable siblings while suffocating on my Dad's pipe smoke, all while being forced to listen to 'Sing Something Simple' would traumatise anyone. 

4. My Dad was obsessed with his television shows to the point where I suspect it was a form of mental illness. When VCRs came along, he had shelves filled with tapes full of programmes he never had time to watch because he was always taping something else. He had a graph paper notepad by his chair on which he would map out his viewing schedule each evening based on what was on all 4 channels, which shows he could watch and which he'd need to tape. Holidays were extremely stressful for him but he'd think nothing of asking friends and family to record things for him so he wouldn't miss any of his programmes.

5. The pair of them had an endless list of seemingly arbitrary rules regarding how things had to be done and would fly into rages if I or my sisters didn't follow them. Even when we were adults and living in our own places. You couldn't make a sandwich without putting margarine on one (and only one) slice of bread. No tomato sauce if there were baked beans on the plate (they come in tomato sauce, you see). HP was OK. The phone had to be answered by reciting the phone number, never with "Hello" or any other variation. And on, and on, and on.

I could easily be here all day, so I'll stop now.

 

They f**k you up, your mum and dad.
   They may not mean to, but they do.
~ P. Larkin 

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What a spectacular heads gone reaction to a light-hearted thread. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you should blindly ignore any minor, and funny, annoying habits/quirks they have.
I’m assuming your offspring have made it explicitly clear that they think you’re a bitter old c**t and this has opened some old wounds to provoke these posts.
F

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My Dad has been dead so long that I've forgotten any infuriating things he did but I could probably write a book on my Mum.

Like a few others in this thread, she has the heating up to hell levels and has the cheek to complain about the heat in the summer.
Fairly recently she has started slurping any liquid that she's taking no matter the temperature. Coffee, soup, water, wine, gin are all loudly slurped.
She complains if she has to be out early. i.e. Has to get the bus at 10 o'clock. Retirement eh!
She thinks she still has authority over me and my three brothers. If she tells us to do something, we just nod along and still do our own thing.
That'll do for now as I want the p&b loyal to buy my book!

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6 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

Died. 

 

5 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

This.

They really are inconsiderate b*****ds.

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Where's Slippy P?

Anyway, here is a genuine question which I know the answer to but I don't understand why:

See when your folks (or anyone really) dies - why do you have to pay to bury them or have them cremated?  Why can't you just bury them out the back door, put them on a bonfire, chuck them in the sea?

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Every time my dad comes and stays at ours in our 2 bed flat we always let him and my mum have the en suite bedroom where the toilet is as far away from the sitting room as possible so they have a bit of privacy. Despite this he always just gets up and shits in the toilet right next to the sitting room with absolutely no attempt at being discrete what so ever, we have to hear the toilet seat being adjusted, his belt being unbuckled and him taking a seat before he lets rip with loud animalistic groaning sounds throughout. He doesn’t even attempt to wipe quietly before returning to the sitting room and acting as if nothing has happened. My mum gets furious with him and she definitely tells him off for it but it obviously doesn’t bother him at all.

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1 hour ago, Shotgun said:

Both of mine are off to wherever people go when they die so no fear of them reading any of this. But, when they were alive...

1. Keeping the house at a temperature which would've had Satan himself begging for an ice lolly.
1b. Complaining incessantly about the cost of heating.

2. Thinking that compliments or praise were a sign of weakness. It really didn't matter what I achieved, from schoolwork, to athletics to anything else, they would always find fault somewhere. I once finished top of the class in art. The first time I'd ever come close to finishing top of the class in anything. I quite literally ran home from school to tell them to be met with "Never mind art, when are you going to come top of the class in maths or physics! (Answer: Never) Who cares about art!" What's frustrating about that one is I really did have a talent for art as a teenager and who knows where it might've led. The pair of them made sure to knock it out of me though and I was well into middle age before I attempted to draw or paint again.

3. Having the car radio permanently tuned to Radio 2. Being trapped in a Hillman Avenger for hours on Sunday afternoon drives along with 2 detestable siblings while suffocating on my Dad's pipe smoke, all while being forced to listen to 'Sing Something Simple' would traumatise anyone. 

4. My Dad was obsessed with his television shows to the point where I suspect it was a form of mental illness. When VCRs came along, he had shelves filled with tapes full of programmes he never had time to watch because he was always taping something else. He had a graph paper notepad by his chair on which he would map out his viewing schedule each evening based on what was on all 4 channels, which shows he could watch and which he'd need to tape. Holidays were extremely stressful for him but he'd think nothing of asking friends and family to record things for him so he wouldn't miss any of his programmes.

5. The pair of them had an endless list of seemingly arbitrary rules regarding how things had to be done and would fly into rages if I or my sisters didn't follow them. Even when we were adults and living in our own places. You couldn't make a sandwich without putting margarine on one (and only one) slice of bread. No tomato sauce if there were baked beans on the plate (they come in tomato sauce, you see). HP was OK. The phone had to be answered by reciting the phone number, never with "Hello" or any other variation. And on, and on, and on.

I could easily be here all day, so I'll stop now.

 

They f**k you up, your mum and dad.
   They may not mean to, but they do.
~ P. Larkin 

With all due respect your parents sound like they were absolute mentalists.

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12 minutes ago, Flybhoy said:

With all due respect your parents sound like they were absolute mentalists.

No respect needed - they were. The sad thing was, it wasn't until I was grown and moved away that I really began to appreciate just how messed up my childhood was. I thought all this was normal.

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1 hour ago, throbber said:

Every time my dad comes and stays at ours in our 2 bed flat we always let him and my mum have the en suite bedroom where the toilet is as far away from the sitting room as possible so they have a bit of privacy. Despite this he always just gets up and shits in the toilet right next to the sitting room with absolutely no attempt at being discrete what so ever, we have to hear the toilet seat being adjusted, his belt being unbuckled and him taking a seat before he lets rip with loud animalistic groaning sounds throughout. He doesn’t even attempt to wipe quietly before returning to the sitting room and acting as if nothing has happened. My mum gets furious with him and she definitely tells him off for it but it obviously doesn’t bother him at all.

Turn the telly or radio up full when he goes, and back down or off when he gets back, If he doesn't take the hint at least you won't all be staring at each other with grating teeth and going around with air freshener.

Edited by welshbairn

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1 hour ago, Shotgun said:

Both of mine are off to wherever people go when they die so no fear of them reading any of this. But, when they were alive...

1. Keeping the house at a temperature which would've had Satan himself begging for an ice lolly.
1b. Complaining incessantly about the cost of heating.

2. Thinking that compliments or praise were a sign of weakness. It really didn't matter what I achieved, from schoolwork, to athletics to anything else, they would always find fault somewhere. I once finished top of the class in art. The first time I'd ever come close to finishing top of the class in anything. I quite literally ran home from school to tell them to be met with "Never mind art, when are you going to come top of the class in maths or physics! (Answer: Never) Who cares about art!" What's frustrating about that one is I really did have a talent for art as a teenager and who knows where it might've led. The pair of them made sure to knock it out of me though and I was well into middle age before I attempted to draw or paint again.

3. Having the car radio permanently tuned to Radio 2. Being trapped in a Hillman Avenger for hours on Sunday afternoon drives along with 2 detestable siblings while suffocating on my Dad's pipe smoke, all while being forced to listen to 'Sing Something Simple' would traumatise anyone. 

4. My Dad was obsessed with his television shows to the point where I suspect it was a form of mental illness. When VCRs came along, he had shelves filled with tapes full of programmes he never had time to watch because he was always taping something else. He had a graph paper notepad by his chair on which he would map out his viewing schedule each evening based on what was on all 4 channels, which shows he could watch and which he'd need to tape. Holidays were extremely stressful for him but he'd think nothing of asking friends and family to record things for him so he wouldn't miss any of his programmes.

5. The pair of them had an endless list of seemingly arbitrary rules regarding how things had to be done and would fly into rages if I or my sisters didn't follow them. Even when we were adults and living in our own places. You couldn't make a sandwich without putting margarine on one (and only one) slice of bread. No tomato sauce if there were baked beans on the plate (they come in tomato sauce, you see). HP was OK. The phone had to be answered by reciting the phone number, never with "Hello" or any other variation. And on, and on, and on.

I could easily be here all day, so I'll stop now.

 

They f**k you up, your mum and dad.
   They may not mean to, but they do.
~ P. Larkin 

 

Jeezo it does sound like your Dad had some kind of compulsive condition doesn't it? What a shame - also for them to knock pride out of you about art. At least you have picked it up again.

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