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Dating disasters

Richey Edwards

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TheScarf

TheScarf

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Posted

Went on a date with this lassie about 5 years ago.  She had a son who was about 4.

We got talking about him and the chat moved onto other stuff like general life, and a guy came into the pub with a dog so we got talking about dogs.  She then said something about 'Mack' and I started talking more about dogs.  I then said something, I cant mind what, and she said 'No, Mack is my son, it's short for Mackenzie'.  

For like 10 minutes we had talked about Mack, not realising I was on about a dog and she was on about a boy.  Was incredibly awkward.  Actually, you probably had to be there.

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Jacksgranda

Jacksgranda

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Posted
9 hours ago, jamamafegan said:

I had a tinder date once in Aberdeen. I was living an hour away from the city in Aberdeenshire at the time so I drove through with the intention of ending up in the girls bed by the end of the night - or drive home.

Date went off to a shaky start but the initial nerves died down and it was going well, we were starting to get cosy in bar. Now, because I had the car I couldn’t drink. I very cheekily told the lass earlier that I could have a drink however she would have to let me stay at hers - on the sofa of course. She had a think about it and then agreed, so up to the bar I went and got us a bottle of wine. Job was a good’n. Or so I thought.

Girl gets a phone call and goes outside. She returns with a worried look on her face and says her friend is at a pub somewhere and is in a right state because her ex bf has turned up. I was thinking, well so what? Let her deal with that herself surely. Apparently this was not an option given that this ex had “fucked up her life.” I thought I could go along with her, get this sorted and continue the night after. Nope, this girl was getting picked up and taken home to be looked after. Just like that the date was over.

Now I had a problem. I’ve had a drink. I can’t drive home and now I can’t stay at hers. Genuinely feeling bad about the situation and the date ending so prematurely she says she’ll pay my taxi - no chance I said, it’ll cost a fortune. She ended up giving me the keys to her flat. I walked back and let myself in, slept in her bed, got up the next morning and drove home :lol:

It was probably a really stupid thing to do on her part but she must be a good judge of character because I could have ransacked her room if I was bad b*****d. Either way it was an incredibly sound thing to do and I was thankful. I never heard from her again.


Another Aberdeen date ended oddly when the girls mate decided we weren’t getting to stay at her flat again after we had done so the night before. I ended up staying at the girls parents house, meeting her mum and being put in a separate bed. That was a bit weird.

How did she get her keys back.

You wouldn't want to sleep with her mother, surely? Unless she was a MILF, of course.

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ICTChris

ICTChris

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My mate had a young lady come back to his flat after a night out, she went to the toilet but slipped and fell through his shower screen, smashing it and cutting herself.  He heard the crash, ran in and she was in the bath, covered in blood and broken glass.  he had to phone an ambulance, his neighbours must've had a few questions about why a bloodied young woman is being helped from his house at 3am.

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Hillonearth

Hillonearth

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The only time I've agreed to a blind date was years ago when a mate of mine was running a newsgroup for some band or other. An American lassie on it was planning to tour Europe and had arranged to stay with him and his wife for a few days.

I was single at the time, and he asked if I wanted to meet up with them and her: "I think you might like her..." He sent me a photo of her - all-American cheerleading type; blonde, racked and stacked, from somewhere in Ohio...Cindy from Cincinnati or something along those lines. What's not to like?

She was due to arrive the Friday afternoon, and we'd arranged to meet in the Solid Rock that night - if you've never been there, it features a long bar perpendicular to the entrance, so you can see right down it as you come in. As I did, I saw my mate straight away down the far end - he's like 6'5" so he's hard to miss - and clocked what he was with.

The intervening years had not been kind to Cindy from Cincinnati.

Although recognisably the same burd, the photo had clearly been taken maybe ten years and twelve stone previously...we were now looking at the fringes of mobility scooter territory. I'm not ashamed to say I turned on my heel and legged it.

Got a phone call the next day: "What happened to you last night?"

"I saw her"

"Aaaah..."

I found out from him later there wasn't even the defence of her having a great personality or whatever - the whole time she'd been at theirs she was boring as f**k, totally high-maintenance, and ate them out of house and home.

 

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Gaz FFC

Gaz FFC

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, TheScarf said:

Went on a date with this lassie about 5 years ago.  She had a son who was about 4.

We got talking about him and the chat moved onto other stuff like general life, and a guy came into the pub with a dog so we got talking about dogs.  She then said something about 'Mack' and I started talking more about dogs.  I then said something, I cant mind what, and she said 'No, Mack is my son, it's short for Mackenzie'.  

For like 10 minutes we had talked about Mack, not realising I was on about a dog and she was on about a boy.  Was incredibly awkward.  Actually, you probably had to be there.

Kind of an awkward date if I'm sat watching.

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Hedgecutter

Hedgecutter

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Granny Danger said:

I met a girl at a disco (yes I know) in 1974 and it turned into a total disaster.

It will be our 43rd wedding anniversary in February.

Is there anybody over the age of 60 in this country that didn't meet their spouse at some form of dance?  Genuine question.

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Granny Danger

Granny Danger

Posted
Posted
9 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

Is there anybody over the age of 60 in this country that didn't meet their spouse at some form of dance?  Genuine question.

If you’re including school dances it was probably a very high percentage.

 

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KnightswoodBear

KnightswoodBear

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, ICTChris said:

My mate had a young lady come back to his flat after a night out, she went to the toilet but slipped and fell through his shower screen, smashing it and cutting herself.  He heard the crash, ran in and she was in the bath, covered in blood and broken glass.  he had to phone an ambulance, his neighbours must've had a few questions about why a bloodied young woman is being helped from his house at 3am.

..again

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Sergeant Wilson

Sergeant Wilson

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, Hillonearth said:

The only time I've agreed to a blind date was years ago when a mate of mine was running a newsgroup for some band or other. An American lassie on it was planning to tour Europe and had arranged to stay with him and his wife for a few days.

I was single at the time, and he asked if I wanted to meet up with them and her: "I think you might like her..." He sent me a photo of her - all-American cheerleading type; blonde, racked and stacked, from somewhere in Ohio...Cindy from Cincinnati or something along those lines. What's not to like?

She was due to arrive the Friday afternoon, and we'd arranged to meet in the Solid Rock that night - if you've never been there, it features a long bar perpendicular to the entrance, so you can see right down it as you come in. As I did, I saw my mate straight away down the far end - he's like 6'5" so he's hard to miss - and clocked what he was with.

The intervening years had not been kind to Cindy from Cincinnati.

Although recognisably the same burd, the photo had clearly been taken maybe ten years and twelve stone previously...we were now looking at the fringes of mobility scooter territory. I'm not ashamed to say I turned on my heel and legged it.

Got a phone call the next day: "What happened to you last night?"

"I saw her"

"Aaaah..."

I found out from him later there wasn't even the defence of her having a great personality or whatever - the whole time she'd been at theirs she was boring as f**k, totally high-maintenance, and ate them out of house and home.

 

The Solid Rock makes The Alpen Lodge look like Caesers Palace.

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drs

drs

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Posted
2 hours ago, TheScarf said:

Mine met both working in the office when building the Kessock Bridge.  Dad was a civil engineer, mum was a receptionist.

Christ, I remember when going home involved a massive detour as there was no Kessock Bridge.

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Herman Hessian

Herman Hessian

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4 minutes ago, drs said:

Christ, I remember when going home involved a massive detour as there was no Kessock Bridge.

i've "worked" in the same place for 28 years, - lived at maybe half a dozen places during that time, but essentially with the same journey to and from work

made no difference whatsoever to me....

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Hillonearth

Hillonearth

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59 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

The Solid Rock makes The Alpen Lodge look like Caesers Palace.

Aye, it's been dying on its arse for a long time now. Everybody concerned were metalheads however, so it was as good a place as any to meet up and head on elsewhere.

Until I discovered he'd set me up with a transatlantic lake monster anyway.

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