ICTChris Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 "Did anyone else notice the barman dipping his cock into that staunch-looking lad's brandy?" Moving swiftly on, illiterate folk who demand that everyone else read things out to them. Please note, it's not the illiterate part that bugs me - there can be all sorts of reasons why somebody might be unable to read. It's the entitled attitude that random strangers exists as their personal translator. I realise this is probably a very niche category, but I've met a couple lately.A guy asked a friend of mine to translate the bus timetable at the stop near the top of Easter Road for him because he couldn’t read. Also, another friend of mine had a guy in her antenatal class who said not to give him a leaflet about something because “I can’t read, I’m a pure daftie!”Imagine going through life not being able to read. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 (edited) I honestly don’t know how folk manage it tbh. Edited September 22, 2019 by Melanius Mullarkey 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 I should probably add, this post was prompted by a lassie who insisted that I read out the titles of several hundred DVDs to her, otherwise "how else am I supposed to know what I want to buy?" I read the first few but, upon realising she was going to want all of them read to her, I explained that I had a job to be getting on with. She then started asking random customers to read them out. She seemed bemused that it wasn't happening, so I presume this is how she's gone through her entire life thus far. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 36 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said: I should probably add, this post was prompted by a lassie who insisted that I read out the titles of several hundred DVDs to her, otherwise "how else am I supposed to know what I want to buy?" I read the first few but, upon realising she was going to want all of them read to her, I explained that I had a job to be getting on with. She then started asking random customers to read them out. She seemed bemused that it wasn't happening, so I presume this is how she's gone through her entire life thus far. You should have made them up 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tongue_tied_danny Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 High fiving your mates. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 1 hour ago, tongue_tied_danny said: High fiving your mates. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 (edited) 3 hours ago, DA Baracus said: You should have made them up Noddy Meets Geronimo in Disney Land The Adventures of The Vestal Virgins Further Adventures of The Vestal Virgins Adventures of The Vestals Loyalist Pubs of The Falls Road Justin Trudeau's Black and White Minstrel Show Edited September 22, 2019 by Jacksgranda 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inanimate Carbon Rod Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 You should have made them up just use p&b as your inspiration, ‘All morning I killed cows, the pie and bovril story’‘Grimbo’s pet cemetery’ ‘So I think Gunthers wife married an axe murderer’‘The hunchback- an erotic tale’ ‘The waffenthinmintersist’ ‘Drop dead tony’ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Prams - an evolution 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Order from the European Dishes section of the Indian / Chinese menu. 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Order from the European Dishes section of the Indian / Chinese menu. Brewdog w****r from my work get a Chicken Maryland [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 I was once in an Indian and a party of twelve were on the table next to us. More than half ordered from the European menu. Insanity. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 (edited) 18 minutes ago, ICTChris said: I was once in an Indian . Edited September 23, 2019 by Sergeant Wilson 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Unless they just don't like the food but still want to go out with their mates and are going with the majority choice of course.[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] its so obvious I dont even want to take it! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinkinFighter Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 For the other thread, but I'd be very wary of someone who didn't like Chinese or Indian food. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Chicken Maryland. On every Chinese and Indian menu since 1972... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 Friend of mine coming this weekend"I don't like pork, bacon, any meat or fish except grilled chicken"f**k you coming to Germany for then? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 4 minutes ago, Stellaboz said: Friend of mine coming this weekend "I don't like pork, bacon, any meat or fish except grilled chicken" f**k you coming to Germany for then? I hear they do good grilled chicken. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 1 hour ago, ICTChris said: I was once in an Indian and a party of twelve were on the table next to us. More than half ordered from the European menu. Insanity. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted September 23, 2019 Share Posted September 23, 2019 19 minutes ago, Stellaboz said: Friend of mine coming this weekend "I don't like pork, bacon, any meat or fish except grilled chicken" f**k you coming to Germany for then? Beer, you nonce. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.