What’s the funniest and strangest thing you’ve ever witnessed at a football match?

[Northboy]

I recall being at a Scotland vs Estonia match at Pittodrie in the early 90s.  It was early days for Estonia as an independent nation and while they had played a few games I don't think they'd scored a competitive goal.  Early on they hit the side netting and it was one of those where the whole crowd thought it was in. There was a small group of Estonian supporters in the main stand, one of whom didn't catch on that it wasn't actually a goal. He ran down the steps and out to the middle of the park where he threw his arms around the 'scorer' in wild celebration. When he realised his mistake he had to endure an embarrassed trudge back to the sidelines much to the amusement and derision of the crowd.  He was met by a copper who, rather than nick the poor guy, simply patted him on the head and showed him back to his seat.

[CaspianChris]

Just remembered Nicky Walker slipping as he went to kick the ball out his hands at Tannadice and the ball rolling straight to Robbie Winters which led to Uniteds opening goal in a 4-0 win over Aberdeen on 1/1/97.

[yoda]

The season County got promoted to the SPL (or perhaps the season before), they played Raith Rovers at Starks Park one midweek. A dog wandered on to the pitch, sat down at the corner flag, then wandered back out of the stadium. Ball was at the other end of the pitch so play wasn't stopped. I don't think anyone actually noticed beyond the handful of County fans in the away end. Bizarre.

[Estragon]

1 hour ago, Northboy said:

I recall being at a Scotland vs Estonia match at Pittodrie in the early 90s.  It was early days for Estonia as an independent nation and while they had played a few games I don't think they'd scored a competitive goal.  Early on they hit the side netting and it was one of those where the whole crowd thought it was in. There was a small group of Estonian supporters in the main stand, one of whom didn't catch on that it wasn't actually a goal. He ran down the steps and out to the middle of the park where he threw his arms around the 'scorer' in wild celebration. When he realised his mistake he had to endure an embarrassed trudge back to the sidelines much to the amusement and derision of the crowd.  He was met by a copper who, rather than nick the poor guy, simply patted him on the head and showed him back to his seat.

I feel that guy's pain.  I celebrated wildly in a pub in Killie, crucially turning my back on the telly, when the ball was squared to Chris Iwelumo against Norway....

When I saw everyone was going quiet, and turned round to note the score was still 0-0...I unwittingly doubled my embarrassment by railing invective at the linesman - who I assumed had flagged for offside.

One instant replay later I just wanted to go home...

[Ranaldo Bairn]

2 hours ago, ShaggysBeard said:

22 years on. No affiliation to either club. Yet, I still find myself urging Jim Jefferies to haul his players off.

Gough having a go at the referee following Paul Ritchie's red card is telling.

Yep. Raging watching that.

Hearts should have refused to kick off after the foul or goal kick or whatever. Force the ref to abandon the game. Dundee United should have done the same in Levein's meisterwerk at Ibrox when it became clear to everyone the ref was cheating.

Mind you, the SFA would probably deduct them 15 points or something.

[Kamenitza]

 

T. C. Keay end at Dens in the days before segregation with Celtic the visitors. Two players trying to reach a low cross end up on the ground just beside the goal. A tumbler, lobbed from the crowd, bounces off the thigh of the Celtic forward John Hughes.     
After some shuffling of the crowd, one wee guy is left standing in splendid isolation with fingers pointing at him from all directions. Like the parting of the Red Sea a way is cleared for two police to make their way to him. As he is being led down to the track he comes out with the ultimate, sure-fire defence - " It wisnae me, Ah didnae mean to hit big Yogi! "

 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

2 hours ago, ShaggysBeard said:

Gough having a go at the referee following Paul Ritchie's red card is telling.

Fake news.

"Oh dear please dont send him off"

[DA Baracus]

2 hours ago, Northboy said:

I recall being at a Scotland vs Estonia match at Pittodrie in the early 90s.  It was early days for Estonia as an independent nation and while they had played a few games I don't think they'd scored a competitive goal.  Early on they hit the side netting and it was one of those where the whole crowd thought it was in. There was a small group of Estonian supporters in the main stand, one of whom didn't catch on that it wasn't actually a goal. He ran down the steps and out to the middle of the park where he threw his arms around the 'scorer' in wild celebration. When he realised his mistake he had to endure an embarrassed trudge back to the sidelines much to the amusement and derision of the crowd.  He was met by a copper who, rather than nick the poor guy, simply patted him on the head and showed him back to his seat.

Sadly no footage of the incident;

 

[Andy_K_97]

4 hours ago, deadasdillinger said:

I mind a streaker running on to the pitch vs St Johnstone away in the 90s. 

Also a couple of seasons ago away to Hamilton, boys behind us are giving it a chant about how Dougie Imrie's dugs got tits. f**k knows why. Killie go a goal down. The boys keep singing. Older guy in front of me finally loses it, turns round and goes "I DONT GIVE A f**k ABOUT DOUGIE IMRIE AND HIS DUG, IM HERE TO WATCH KILLIE! AND WE'RE GETTING BEAT IN CASE YOUVE NO NOTICED!"

That only served to encourage them, so the song continued for the rest of the game, and the guy who lost the plot becomes the butt of the joke. Folk he was with were all wetting themselves 

Ah yes, this was wonderful. Probably the best thing I've seen at that ground apart from Coulibaly's goal later in that game. 

As for me it was a mate's Sunday league game where one of the players who wasn't playing in that game was still a bit pished from the night before. He turned up specifically to give the referee abuse. The ref sent him out of the ground and he spent the remainder of the game hiding behind a tree on a hill not too far away with a half-bottle of wreck the hoose juice shouting the same abuse at said referee.

Simple pleasures.

[thisal]

4 hours ago, Northboy said:

I recall being at a Scotland vs Estonia match at Pittodrie in the early 90s.  It was early days for Estonia as an independent nation and while they had played a few games I don't think they'd scored a competitive goal.  Early on they hit the side netting and it was one of those where the whole crowd thought it was in. There was a small group of Estonian supporters in the main stand, one of whom didn't catch on that it wasn't actually a goal. He ran down the steps and out to the middle of the park where he threw his arms around the 'scorer' in wild celebration. When he realised his mistake he had to endure an embarrassed trudge back to the sidelines much to the amusement and derision of the crowd.  He was met by a copper who, rather than nick the poor guy, simply patted him on the head and showed him back to his seat.

 

1 hour ago, DA Baracus said:

Sadly no footage of the incident;

 

No but if you play it back you can see Brian McClair score for Scotland!!

[Flybhoy]

One time after a game at Ibrox, we were noising up the **** near the segregation cordon between the Broomloan & Govan stands when, this particular rabid orc for some reason threw......

 

....ach i've said too much already. 

[Szamo's_Ammo]

7 hours ago, ICTChris said:

Gavin Gunning having a tantrum and storming off the pitch was pretty funny.

 

6 hours ago, CaspianChris said:

Picking up the ball like that and having an infant like tantrum sums that imbecile up perfectly.

 

It's meh ba and eh'm goin hame.

[Raidernation]

^^^ still utterly fantastic

[The Mantis]

9 hours ago, Northboy said:

I recall being at a Scotland vs Estonia match at Pittodrie in the early 90s.  It was early days for Estonia as an independent nation and while they had played a few games I don't think they'd scored a competitive goal.  Early on they hit the side netting and it was one of those where the whole crowd thought it was in. There was a small group of Estonian supporters in the main stand, one of whom didn't catch on that it wasn't actually a goal. He ran down the steps and out to the middle of the park where he threw his arms around the 'scorer' in wild celebration. When he realised his mistake he had to endure an embarrassed trudge back to the sidelines much to the amusement and derision of the crowd.  He was met by a copper who, rather than nick the poor guy, simply patted him on the head and showed him back to his seat.

I was at a Hibs - Dunfermline game away back in the day. Eric Stevenson was on the wing for Hibs. The game kicked off and it was fed out to Eric who belted down the slope and fired in a shot. He hit the side netting but he was the only person in the ground who didn’t realise, as he ran round behind the goals celebrating, and everybody else pished their breeks laughing.

[The Mantis]

Before Whitehill got a proper fence for their license, they had this old wire mesh fence with a ladder up against it in case the ball got kicked out the park. One day this guy Tommy went over for the ball, threw it back over the fence, then climbed up and jumped. Some laughter broke out and even the players stopped to see what it was. Tommy was hanging from the fence by his parka.

[Scotty Tunbridge]

20 hours ago, Im_Rodger said:

Cowdenbeath 1-1 Hamilton Academical 

Saturday 29th of March 2014

Scottish Championship

 

Full time scenes were something that cannot be spoken of. 

 

@accies1874 @Scotty Tunbridge @Bert Raccoon @Patrick Bateman

Not sure if any of you were there but if you know, you know. 

 

11 hours ago, accies1874 said:

The only time I've ever seen a full-on scrap inside a football ground. Still gets spoken about to this day on the Vaults bus. 

 

Bert Raccoon's actions that day definitely spurred the team on to promotion. 

[ATLIS]

We're about to pump Falkirk out the cup last season when a woman in her mid 40s with children and husband in tow screams from behind us "I don't give a f**k aBOUT YOUR SHITEY TEAM. GO BACK TO YOUR LASAGNE STADIUM"

So this prompted the beautiful song of "We love lasagne, we do..."

[andylivi1]

31 minutes ago, ATLIS said:

We're about to pump Falkirk out the cup last season when a woman in her mid 40s with children and husband in tow screams from behind us "I don't give a f**k aBOUT YOUR SHITEY TEAM. GO BACK TO YOUR LASAGNE STADIUM"

So this prompted the beautiful song of "We love lasagne, we do..."

I’ve never heard as much nonsense coming from one family at a football match ever, was incredible, very very funny though. 

[Southside Hibee]

 

[GroundskeeperWillie]

I remember a few years back at Irvine Meadow, the game had to be stopped when an elderly lady from one of the nearby houses stormed onto the pitch to register her disgust that someone had parked their car in front of her driveway.  She had to be persuaded to leave the field by a couple of members of the Medda committee IIRC.  I'm sure the sub-editors for the Sun paper had a field day with that one