coprolite Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 A kid at my school claimed to have invented going woop-woop ( like off rikki lake or the sound of the police) . Another claimed his Uncle landed a fighter plane on the motorway. A guy at work is mates with Jordan, Michael Carrick and Alan Sugar, has a portfolio of property in new york and recently hospitalised two thugs who attacked him. Apparently a guy on here has invented a whole domestic scenario to cover for deviancy. Why do people make up lies that no-one will believe? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Just now, coprolite said: Why do people make up lies that no-one will believe? I would think the best person to answer that question would be @Peppino Impastato who sounds remarkably like the third person you mentioned there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Some guy once said he was offered a fight and 3 blow jobs from different women in return for free electricity in Paisley. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trackdaybob Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 In the 70's they did indeed land a Sepecat Jaguar GR1 on a motorway, testing it's rough airstrip operations capabilities. No idea if it was the kid in questions uncle but it did happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 12 minutes ago, coprolite said: A kid at my school claimed to have invented going woop-woop ( like off rikki lake or the sound of the police) . Another claimed his Uncle landed a fighter plane on the motorway. A guy at work is mates with Jordan, Michael Carrick and Alan Sugar, has a portfolio of property in new york and recently hospitalised two thugs who attacked him. Apparently a guy on here has invented a whole domestic scenario to cover for deviancy. Why do people make up lies that no-one will believe? What a coincidence! Boutros Boutros Ghali asked me to give a talk to the UN on this very subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Back when I was at uni, I used to tell people I shagged one of the B*witched girls, by virtue of the fact that I had moved over from Ireland. Despite the fact that I couldn't even tell them her name. I repeated it that many times I started to believe it myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Who on here claimed to have shagged Hayden Pannettiere again? Was it @Poet of the Macabre ? Apologies if not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 1 minute ago, Rugster said: Who on here claimed to have shagged Hayden Pannettiere again? Was it @Poet of the Macabre ? Apologies if not. It was aye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 I was summoned to a disciplinary meeting for playing Football Manager on a laptop during a nightshift. However, I did not wish to attend the meeting so sent my assistant instead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 There was a kid in my year at school who claimed that he'd been out hillwalking when an RAF jet flew past so low it clipped his shoulder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 10 minutes ago, ICTChris said: There was a kid in my year at school who claimed that he'd been out hillwalking when an RAF jet flew past so low it clipped his shoulder. Outstanding. I love threads like these. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 2 minutes ago, Rugster said: Outstanding. I love threads like these. He also said that he had a special jacket that had an inflatable dinghy that automatically inflated if it was immersed in water, thus saving you if you were drowning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 3 minutes ago, ICTChris said: He also said that he had a special jacket that had an inflatable dinghy that automatically inflated if it was immersed in water, thus saving you if you were drowning. Good idea tbf. Except in rainy countries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Paul "Cheesy" Morrison was our go to guy in Elgin for this kind of shite. Amongst his wild claims of shagging teachers whilst still in primary school, he claimed to have bough the Bishops Nightclub (RIP) in Elgin and was going to fight Mike Tyson for the world heavyweight title in a boxing ring on the dancefloor later that year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Some people think the team they support is the same club that died in 2012. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D Angelo Barksdale Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 There's a guy named Tony who might be able to shed some light on this subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dindeleux Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 £500 note#TB4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 1 hour ago, coprolite said: Why do people make up lies that no-one will believe? I was having a pint with Barack Obama in Lochee last night and asked him exactly the same thing. BTW he’s slow to put his hand in his pocket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kennboy1978 Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Posted some of these before:(All from the same guy at work. Genuinely 100% true, swear on my sons life, right hand up to god etc these words came out of his mouth)His dad found £10,000 down the back of the sofa.Out on his boat in the Firth of Forth, the captain of a Submarine asked him over the Tannoy to move away - As he was approaching HMS property.He slid down the Pyramids. On the same holiday to Egypt he was almost refused entry to the UK - As border control didn't believe such a sallow skinned person could have possibly have come from his mum and dad. Apparently the tan he received on that holiday still exists to this day too.Gave his wife umpteen orgasms as she was sleeping.As he was pumping his girlfriend (doggy style), her flatmat came into the room looking for her glasses. Saw what was going on and looked over his shoulder and commented favourably on his massive manhood.After I asked him what he was doing at the weekend, his answer was "Fitting a £12,000 sound system in his mates Subaru Impreza."Managed to get from Strathaven to Manchester for the UEFA cup final in an hour and a half.He travelled north, from Strathaven again, going 90 mph for three hours solid.Saved East Kilbride shopping centre from a terrorist attack by chucking a Muslimy looking guy with a rucksack out of the fire escape.An unarmed duo comprising of himself and his brother saved a bookies in Paisley from an armed robber.He fought the same brother in the UK Karate championships. Although his mum and dad had to leave as it was such a bloodbath.His mate owns and runs the website Heaven666.There are probably a few I've forgotten. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz FFC Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 26 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Paul "Cheesy" Morrison was our go to guy in Elgin for this kind of shite. Amongst his wild claims of shagging teachers whilst still in primary school, he claimed to have bough the Bishops Nightclub (RIP) in Elgin and was going to fight Mike Tyson for the world heavyweight title in a boxing ring on the dancefloor later that year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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