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Things to teach the grandkids


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As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 

So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".

Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

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1 hour ago, NewBornBairn said:

As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 

So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".

Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

I do and I wouldn’t let you near her.

 

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1 hour ago, NewBornBairn said:

As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 

So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".

Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

Not yet, but I'm keeping notes.

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3 hours ago, NewBornBairn said:

As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 

So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".

Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

Helping to rescue our kids from deranged, nannying 'Progressives' one truthbomb at a time, solid.

Solidify your cleaning and cooking claims by presenting the science that women are more neurotic than men; guns and crossbows by the history of the military draft.

As such, boys should be dressed in this:

Related image

And girls this:

Image result for girls pink tshirt

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3 hours ago, NewBornBairn said:

As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 

So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".

Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

I've 15. I'm surprised they don't all swear like troopers. Apart from the youngest one, she's only 6 months old.

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2 minutes ago, pandarilla said:

You know you're acting like a fanny...

When banana jumps in to support you.

 

And the stench of monomania pollutes another thread.

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25 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

And the stench of monomania pollutes another thread.

Indeed, no idea why my mainstream left-of-centre views and scientific facts draw such monomaniacal clockwork ire.

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Not a grandad yet but its probably not that far away. Grand kids will most likely live thousands of miles away from me (thankfully, at least until they're about 30 :guntoting ). Simple answer is how to open a tin without a pull off ring pull but as an outdoorsy kind of a cat, I'll be getting them out up the hills or at least into local woods (I know, I know) to learn how to camp (I know, I know).

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4 hours ago, NewBornBairn said:

Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.

Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?

Nailed it already as far as I can see.

 

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22 minutes ago, Cardinal Richelieu said:

Don't fancy being a father but reckon being a grandfather would be a blast. Any ideas how I could do skip fatherhood and drive straight into grandfatherhood?

Yes. 

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They’re surprisingly easy to teach 

 

got 5, can’t wait for them to leave,then pine for them an hour later, wish I’d had them before my kids, best job in the world 

D0DB1204-7FEE-495D-9137-3CD660195B9A.jpeg

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33 minutes ago, Cardinal Richelieu said:

Don't fancy being a father but reckon being a grandfather would be a blast. Any ideas how I could do skip fatherhood and drive straight into grandfatherhood?

@Jacksgrandais absolutely yer man for this.  Absolutely top bloke and top grandfather to many.  No idea how he does it.

Maybe because my crew are still in their mid-late teens but I have no desire to be a grandfather.  I love(d) parenting but I have had my fill of shitey nappies and weans who can't use a knife and fork and have no desire to deal with either any time soon.

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2 hours ago, heedthebaa said:

They’re surprisingly easy to teach 

 

got 5, can’t wait for them to leave,then pine for them an hour later, wish I’d had them before my kids, best job in the world 

D0DB1204-7FEE-495D-9137-3CD660195B9A.jpeg

Minus marks for the hairstyle but doubleplus marks for the beer.

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Don't fancy being a father but reckon being a grandfather would be a blast. Any ideas how I could do skip fatherhood and drive straight into grandfatherhood?

I managed it!
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As a proud grandfather to two boys aged 5 & 6 and a girl aged 3, I take my responsibilities seriously and ensure they get taught the correct things in life. This is to counteract all the inclusivity shite and non-gender specific role-modelling they get fed at playgroups and school. 
So far my proudest moment was when the headmistress cornered the parents and told them to stop telling the boys that "Ladies are terrible drivers".
Whilst their parents buy the kids ironing boards and toy hoovers, I buy them drum kits, toy guns and crossbows whilst telling them cleaning, cooking etc is "Women's work". This doesn't go down too well with the daughter in law. 
Obviously they have Falkirk strips and they've been to games where they learned "lots" of new words.
Any other gems of wisdom I should be passing on?
Do any other P&Bers have grandkids?

You're a complete cretin: imagine putting the poor wee buggers in Falkirk strips.
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