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c***s on the road

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3 minutes ago, NewBornBairn said:

Who was it said the A9 has been improved by the Average Speed cameras? I was on it the other day going up to Boat of Garten and the amount of arseholes overtaking lines of traffic then forcing their way into spaces was as bad as ever. 

That'll never stop until it's dualled.  Whenever the fuck that'll be.

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I hate c***s that turn into junctions crossing the opposite side of the road nearly hitting you as you approach the same junction, lazy c***s. Happened to me last night and instead of trying to correct it, they just slowed down making it worse. Was absolutely oblivious to the gestures I was aiming towards him, suspect he couldn't actually see that well in the dark. 

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9 minutes ago, thistledo said:

I hate c***s that turn into junctions crossing the opposite side of the road nearly hitting you as you approach the same junction, lazy c***s. Happened to me last night and instead of trying to correct it, they just slowed down making it worse. Was absolutely oblivious to the gestures I was aiming towards him, suspect he couldn't actually see that well in the dark. 

Happens all the time on the main road running through our village. One day somebody's going to get cleavered by a lorry, which come down the road with some authority and regularity, and it would serve them right.

It's shocking driving in all honesty, cutting across white lines like that.

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13 minutes ago, thistledo said:

I hate c***s that turn into junctions crossing the opposite side of the road nearly hitting you as you approach the same junction, lazy c***s. Happened to me last night and instead of trying to correct it, they just slowed down making it worse. Was absolutely oblivious to the gestures I was aiming towards him, suspect he couldn't actually see that well in the dark. 

I was crossing a side road on foot a while back and some twat cut right across the road while turning and tooted at me despite the fact he was crossing over the wrong side is the road and I was well past the centre line. Cùnt.

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27 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said:

Happens all the time on the main road running through our village. One day somebody's going to get cleavered by a lorry, which come down the road with some authority and regularity, and it would serve them right.

It's shocking driving in all honesty, cutting across white lines like that.

We can but hope. 

24 minutes ago, Snobot said:

I was crossing a side road on foot a while back and some twat cut right across the road while turning and tooted at me despite the fact he was crossing over the wrong side is the road and I was well past the centre line. Cùnt.

Also an infringement of the highway code, if a pedestrian is already on an unmarked crossing they have the right of way. A great one to whip out in such an occasion, always goes down really well with the driver of the car. 

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1 hour ago, woolf said:

A couple of months back I was leaving the A1 at Musselburgh heading to Sherrif hall.Im in a van doing 60-65 and overtaking an HGV and the arsehole behind me is flashing his lights and is inches behind me.Soon as I’ve pulled in this muppet absolutely floored his beat up old escort to overtake me,giving me the finger as he passed.His motor had one of them “w****r exhausts” and looked like he’d recently painted it with white vinyl silk.

A couple of hundred yards up the road his car had broke down with smoke bellowing out from the bonnet 😂💪.I enjoyed laughing at him so much that I drove back round Sheriff hall  so I could give him a bit more.He wasn’t a happy man/jakey wee b*****d.

Absolutely here for this level of pettiness.

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23 hours ago, Jacksgranda said:

One day somebody's going to get cleavered by a lorry, which come down the road with some authority and regularity, and it would serve them right.

This happens near my work, to a degree. 

Main road is quite narrow and one side has parking for the nearby shops, and folk regularly either just swing across the wrong side of the road into a space, and then start arsing about to get properly in, or just sit hanging out their space towards oncoming traffic. That's compounded my many (most blokes in suits in company cars/mothers with kids) who just swing their doors open no matter what traffic is coming.

Lorries now don't even bother stopping. One ripped a blokes BMW door clean off a few years ago, the guy was lucky he was in the car and not still standing outside. While another car sitting overhanging the lane just got piled into and forced into the car behind it.

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Encountered some absolute oddball driving to work today - he was going about 40 on a 60 road and I overtook him, fair enough it was probably slightly tight but was still within the arrows to move back in as the lanes were going from two down to one. This seemed to really upset him and he sped right up directly behind me with his full beams on for the next few miles right until I turned off. There were numerous cars coming the other way as well who would’ve been dazzled. Very very odd behaviour. 

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One of my favourite pastimes on a long motorway journey is to time a nice slow overtake, preferably a double truck deal at exactly 70, for when i see a German car closing the distance in the right hand mirror way too fast. 

I've shared enough lifts with beamer driving colleagues to know that the level of seethe in the cockpit behind more than justifies any risk. 

I like to remember what my driving instructor told me about being able to see the whole front of the overtaken vehicle before pulling back in. Sometimes you can see them raging and shouting. I like that. 

Edited by coprolite

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9 hours ago, coprolite said:

One of my favourite pastimes on a long motorway journey is to time a nice slow overtake, preferably a double truck deal at exactly 70, for when i see a German car closing the distance in the right hand mirror way too fast. 

I've shared enough lifts with beamer driving colleagues to know that the level of seethe in the cockpit behind more than justifies any risk. 

I like to remember what my driving instructor told me about being able to see the whole front of the overtaken vehicle before pulling back in. Sometimes you can see them raging and shouting. I like that. 

I did this on Sunday driving north from Inverness.

I have a German car, a VW Passat, but I'm quite a tame driver.  Anyway, I overtook a car doing about 65 between Inverness and the Tore roundabout, saw a white BMW 4 series estate come screaming up behind me, I was doing about 68 overtaking this other car and it took me about a minute to fully clear his car safely to be able to move back into the slow lane in front of him.

The Beamer driver was giving me all the v signs and mouthing all the swears under the sun as he roared past me and into the distance.  I just laughed and gave him the wanker gesture.  May have been an undercover rozzer car actually.

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9 hours ago, coprolite said:

One of my favourite pastimes on a long motorway journey is to time a nice slow overtake, preferably a double truck deal at exactly 70, for when i see a German car closing the distance in the right hand mirror way too fast. 

I've shared enough lifts with beamer driving colleagues to know that the level of seethe in the cockpit behind more than justifies any risk. 

I like to remember what my driving instructor told me about being able to see the whole front of the overtaken vehicle before pulling back in. Sometimes you can see them raging and shouting. I like that. 

If you can't see the whole front of the vehicle before pulling in you're courting disaster. Seeing the whole front of the overtaken vehicle is a prerequisite.

I sometimes take my time about moving back into the lane after overtaking particularly if there is some header trying to get into my back seat. I'm a bad man, at times.

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I was taught to be able to see their front number plate, same thing I guess. 

I actually get a little nervous when people are up behind me whilst I'm overtaking. There are a lot of impatient c***s on the road over here who drive far faster and more power cars than mine and I've found myself slowly overtaking on a hill and feeling a bit of pressure. I hate clogging up the road and normally I'll just fire in behind someone in front until it's clear and flat again. 

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Why is that lorry drivers often flash their lights? Sometimes they do it to say hi to a fellow trucker but loads of times I’ve seen them doing it when either I or somebody else overtakes them and pulls back into the other lane. Then they flash their lights at you? Wtf is that all about.

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I've said it before but one of the simple pleasures to be had in driving is brake testing someone tailgating you. Seeing the look of panic as they shit themselves then the impotent rage as they turn bright red helps me get through the day. 

 

The sad thing is the advent of electric brakes means you can't use the handbrake to really put the shits up them (no brake light warning)

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17 minutes ago, jamamafegan said:

Why is that lorry drivers often flash their lights? Sometimes they do it to say hi to a fellow trucker but loads of times I’ve seen them doing it when either I or somebody else overtakes them and pulls back into the other lane. Then they flash their lights at you? Wtf is that all about.

I always took it that there meaning it's safe to pull in. Drive alot of big Van's and trailers etc and always just took it as them signaling that I'm past them.

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18 minutes ago, NewBornBairn said:

I've said it before but one of the simple pleasures to be had in driving is brake testing someone tailgating you. Seeing the look of panic as they shit themselves then the impotent rage as they turn bright red helps me get through the day. 

 

The sad thing is the advent of electric brakes means you can't use the handbrake to really put the shits up them (no brake light warning)

Switch on your sidelights while accelerating.

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30 minutes ago, jamamafegan said:

Why is that lorry drivers often flash their lights? Sometimes they do it to say hi to a fellow trucker but loads of times I’ve seen them doing it when either I or somebody else overtakes them and pulls back into the other lane. Then they flash their lights at you? Wtf is that all about.

 

11 minutes ago, HeWhoWalksBehindTheRows said:

I always took it that there meaning it's safe to pull in. Drive alot of big Van's and trailers etc and always just took it as them signaling that I'm past them.

It's this. I don't really feel like it's much comfort because it tells me they're driving on autopilot to the extent that they're doing it to cars who don't need it compared to lorries who do.

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13 hours ago, coprolite said:

One of my favourite pastimes on a long motorway journey is to time a nice slow overtake, preferably a double truck deal at exactly 70, for when i see a German car closing the distance in the right hand mirror way too fast. 

I've shared enough lifts with beamer driving colleagues to know that the level of seethe in the cockpit behind more than justifies any risk. 

I like to remember what my driving instructor told me about being able to see the whole front of the overtaken vehicle before pulling back in. Sometimes you can see them raging and shouting. I like that. 

This is particularly good fun if it's an artic lorry or truck, you courteously leave good few cars lengths before pulling in, in front of said lorry and the asshole decides to try and undertake you. If you can time it perfectly to indicate and start to move as they decide to undertake it's a wee bonus. 

It's all good fun, until some duffer decides to overtake a lorry at 1mph quicker than the lorry that's only doing 50mph on the motorway then it's hell on earth and they do not deserve a license. 

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4 minutes ago, MixuFruit said:

 

It's this. I don't really feel like it's much comfort because it tells me they're driving on autopilot to the extent that they're doing it to cars who don't need it compared to lorries who do.

It must be hard for them, what with pishing in juice bottles to throw into central reservations and throttling and disposing of prostitutes. 

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