c***s on the road

[thistledo]

13 hours ago, FalkirkBairn93 said:

On xmas eve was driving to my mums with the bairn and the mrs.

Ok the M80 approaching the M876 (think that’s right) and an absolute c**t in a BMW with a personalised Reg pulls right up my arse. Now I drive a 107, it has no boot space so if I had to break in an emergency he was crashing right into my wee one.

Put my arm out to gesture back off, after all he’s speeding up my arse in a BMW SUV and my priority is ensuring my bairn is safe, instead I get full beams up my arse, him moving even closer, and then tooting his horn constantly until he overtook.

Hope he had a shit Christmas and his wife and kids left him.

 

11 hours ago, tamthebam said:

Obviously got a tiny cock.

The A1 just after Dunbar yesterday- the road drops down from dual carriageway to single near to Torness. Some p***k tries to overtake me just as the road narrows...that was a BMW SUV or similar..

That reminds me, I missed one from my last post, on the A82 heading back to Glasgow, c**t overtook a line of traffic heading towards the climbing lane (opposite direction obvs) and crossed the double whites to cut in, in front of me just at the corner. You guessed it, White BMW X6. I caught up further down the road, he was stuck behind another queue of cars... So well worth risking lives for. 

Edited December 28, 2019 by thistledo

[ajwffc]

On xmas eve was driving to my mums with the bairn and the mrs.

Ok the M80 approaching the M876 (think that’s right) and an absolute c**t in a BMW with a personalised Reg pulls right up my arse. Now I drive a 107, it has no boot space so if I had to break in an emergency he was crashing right into my wee one.

Put my arm out to gesture back off, after all he’s speeding up my arse in a BMW SUV and my priority is ensuring my bairn is safe, instead I get full beams up my arse, him moving even closer, and then tooting his horn constantly until he overtook.

Hope he had a shit Christmas and his wife and kids left him.

3 Lane bit of the M80 just after you drive under Castlecary Viaduct? The usual shit driving I see there is cars wanting to go on to the M876 but also want to over take everybody. So they fly down the outside lane and cut across the middle lane into a gap (that doesn't always exist) in the inside lane(becomes the M876) at the last possible moment.

[pozbaird]

11 minutes ago, ajwffc said:

14 hours ago, FalkirkBairn93 said:

On xmas eve was driving to my mums with the bairn and the mrs.

Ok the M80 approaching the M876 (think that’s right) and an absolute c**t in a BMW with a personalised Reg pulls right up my arse. Now I drive a 107, it has no boot space so if I had to break in an emergency he was crashing right into my wee one.

Put my arm out to gesture back off, after all he’s speeding up my arse in a BMW SUV and my priority is ensuring my bairn is safe, instead I get full beams up my arse, him moving even closer, and then tooting his horn constantly until he overtook.

Hope he had a shit Christmas and his wife and kids left him.

3 Lane bit of the M80 just after you drive under Castlecary Viaduct? The usual shit driving I see there is cars wanting to go on to the M876 but also want to over take everybody. So they fly down the outside lane and cut across the middle lane into a gap (that doesn't always exist) in the inside lane(becomes the M876) at the last possible moment.

The Castlecary Viaduct is also a cultural cut-off point. On my side of it, we have weans. On the other side of it, it’s bairns, and everyone knows some bloke called ‘ken’. I’m five minutes away from the viaduct, if I’ve headed North, always like passing back under it and getting back to normality.

[Boghead ranter]

33 minutes ago, pozbaird said:

The Castlecary Viaduct is also a cultural cut-off point. On my side of it, we have weans. On the other side of it, it’s bairns, and everyone knows some bloke called ‘ken’. I’m five minutes away from the viaduct, if I’ve headed North, always like passing back under it and getting back to normality.

This was the basis of my wedding speech all those years ago. The cultural difference from one side of the viaduct to the other is staggering.

Dinnae. 

[pozbaird]

13 minutes ago, Boghead ranter said:

This was the basis of my wedding speech all those years ago. The cultural difference from one side of the viaduct to the other is staggering.

Dinnae. 

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread.

My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

[jimmy boo]

9 hours ago, pozbaird said:

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread.

My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

Were you and Michael both drunk or just one of you?

[pozbaird]

4 minutes ago, jimmy boo said:

Were you and Michael both drunk or just one of you?

I was certainly on the sauce... couldnae’ get vinegar.

[Gaz FFC]

On 27/12/2019 at 21:30, FalkirkBairn93 said:

an absolute c**t in a BMW with a personalised Reg 

 

On 27/12/2019 at 22:15, microdave said:

I fucking hate folk like that. Why can't they just overtake without being an arsehole.

He already answered that.

He drives a BMW for fuxake. You ever known a decent c**t to own 1?

[Bairnardo]

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread. [emoji3]
My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

Proper chippys do vinegar too m8.

"Everything on it" is the correct order.

[pozbaird]

2 hours ago, MixuFixit said:

I found a place in Stirling that did sauce to cater for all the students from Edinburgh but it wasn't quite right, too thick.

Should have catered for more intelligent students then.

[pozbaird]

35 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

Proper chippys do vinegar too m8.

"Everything on it" is the correct order.

I like the sauce they give you in the mysterious far East. Variety is the spice of life. Vinegar in the West, sauce in the East, folk in places like Livingston running around howling at the moon because they’re somewhere in-between. It’s what makes Scotland the country it is. Like Irn Bru, square sausage, and cunty old firm fans.

[Boghead ranter]

I had a supper from the Mari Blu in Deans, Livingston (award winning chippy, dontchaknow) the other night, and they seemed to have covered  the confusion as to whether they are East or West by adding so much vinegar to the sauce that it covered both bases by looking like sauce, but tasting of vinegar.

[JamesP_81]

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread. [emoji3]
My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

I checked this out years ago, it's Shotts.

[johnnydun]

7 hours ago, JamesP_81 said:

On 28/12/2019 at 13:02, pozbaird said:

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread.
My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

I checked this out years ago, it's Shotts.

Your chipper does shots? 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

8 hours ago, JamesP_81 said:

On 28/12/2019 at 13:02, pozbaird said:

Which reminds me of a drunk conversation I had with my mate once - where is the cut-off point in Scotland for vinegar or sauce on yer’ chips. If you go into a Glasgow chippy (aye, a chippy, none of that ‘chipper’ shite thank you), then you’ll get vinegar. Go to Embra’ - sauce. Logically then, you could stop at every chippy in towns along the M8 corridor, and at some point, they’ll change from vinegar to sauce. It could even be in one town. It has to change somewhere. This is the big question, on the wrong thread.
My money is somewhere near Harthill Services. They should erect a big sign -  ‘last vinegar for thirty miles’. 

I checked this out years ago, it's Shotts.

Lies.

nobody has ever stopped in Shotts long enough to buy chips.

[philpy]

The chipshop East Coast in Musselburgh is excellent.    Went with Salt and Vinegar for taste reasons.  

Expensive though. No supper options, pay for your fish then yer chips separately. Plenty better options in musselburgh.

[jimmy boo]

FFS Poz can we get back to the driving now...

[Jacksgranda]

8 hours ago, philpy said:

Expensive though. No supper options, pay for your fish then yer chips separately. Plenty better options in musselburgh.

That's not how you spell batter.

[Newbornbairn]

What's the best way to eat a fish supper when you're driving? If the fish is in a nice crispy batter you can pick it up and bite hunks off it but if it's in a soggy batter and/or really fresh, it falls all over the place and burns your fingers.

 

I've found kebabs are a real b*****d to eat at 60mph. You need both hands so you have to steer with your knees. Fine for motorways but not on the A92 coming south from Dundee through Fife. 

[SlipperyP]

DEATHS.  These figures are only for deaths at the scene. They do not count if you are even in the ambulance and die, never mind the hospital.

They show these results every year as it happens.  Very depressing, however if you look deeper.  It's not that much different than any other week here.  Truly horrific place to drive.  Wish me luck.