Work colleagues

[GordonD]

2 hours ago, steelmen said:

We had one lassie who thanks to the civil service’s great maternity/sick leave policy managed to have a kid, take 6 months maternity leave followed by 5 months sick leave for ‘stress’ came back to work for 2 weeks before going off on 6 months maternity leave again. Of course those 2 weeks she basically sat with her feet up catching up with everyone.

Can't have been that stressed if she got pregnant again during the five months.

On the subject of syndicates, one in my office--though a different department--got all six numbers up on the Lottery. Trouble was, there were so many of them in it that they only got a five-figure amount each. Not to be sniffed at, of course, but not enough to retire on.

[Rugster]

11 minutes ago, GordonD said:

Can't have been that stressed if she got pregnant again during the five months.

On the subject of syndicates, one in my office--though a different department--got all six numbers up on the Lottery. Trouble was, there were so many of them in it that they only got a five-figure amount each. Not to be sniffed at, of course, but not enough to retire on.

Same at a place I used to work at. All 6 numbers and I think they ended up with about 80 grand each. 

[Robin.Hood]

1 hour ago, Honest Saints Fan said:

Your business can get insurance that would pay out if that happened. 

My work has constant collections, big birthdays, weddings, babies etc. I've managed to fit in a wedding, 2 children, a 30th birthday and cancer into my 9 years so have done quite well out of it!

Working in a supermarket is shite for this. I need to start being a bigger c**t 

[Bell™]

2 hours ago, steelmen said:

We had one lassie who thanks to the civil service’s great maternity/sick leave policy managed to have a kid, take 6 months maternity leave followed by 5 months sick leave for ‘stress’ came back to work for 2 weeks before going off on 6 months maternity leave again. Of course those 2 weeks she basically sat with her feet up catching up with everyone.
 

lassie in my work many moons ago did near enough the same thing, with the added bonus of prior to carrying out the plan actually telling folk she was going to get pregnant, rip the c**t out of the no-questions-asked maternity sick-leave policy, take her maternity, then use up the annual leave she'd accrued over that period and then go on the sick again. She was back for a few weeks on reduced hours after her sick leave, then announced she was pregnant again and the cycle continued until she was caught for tax credits fraud and fired.

[GordonD]

1 hour ago, Rugster said:

Same at a place I used to work at. All 6 numbers and I think they ended up with about 80 grand each. 

Was this in Glasgow by any chance?

[thistledo]

I agree with the work collections being murder. The last actual office I had worked in had them regularly, some c**t you don't know is leaving another c**t you met two weeks ago is having a birthday, someone is returning to work, someone bought a new house. Honestly I've never seen the point of it. Any time I've left a place I've just left without a fuss, it's just a fucking job. 

Although, I did leave a well known distillery with a £100 Amazon voucher and a shit load of booze, bags of the stuff. Which is probably the best leaving present I've ever had. Really surprised me because in general I think I'm a bit of a dick.

[Guest bernardblack]

Never had to experience collections at work. Been lucky enough that the employers have been sound enough that the owner/directors dip into their own pocket for these sorts of things...probably claim it as an expense mind, but better than me paying a tenner a time!

[TheScarf]

Aye the collection for someone leaving is always a strange one.  As 99 times out of 100 the person is going to a better paid job.  £17.42 in an envelope isn't going to make a difference.

[Rugster]

36 minutes ago, GordonD said:

Was this in Glasgow by any chance?

Yes - 20 ish years ago

[Jacksgranda]

2 hours ago, GordonD said:

Can't have been that stressed if she got pregnant again during the five months.

On the subject of syndicates, one in my office--though a different department--got all six numbers up on the Lottery. Trouble was, there were so many of them in it that they only got a five-figure amount each. Not to be sniffed at, of course, but not enough to retire on.

That could be anything from £10,000 to £99,999.

1 hour ago, Rugster said:

Same at a place I used to work at. All 6 numbers and I think they ended up with about 80 grand each. 

Hardly worth the winning...

[GordonD]

46 minutes ago, Rugster said:

Yes - 20 ish years ago

Alexander Bain?

[Rugster]

3 minutes ago, GordonD said:

Alexander Bain?

No it wasn't mate

[GordonD]

Just now, Rugster said:

No it wasn't mate

Just a coincidence then as the syndicate in my office won 15 - 20 years ago.

[ilostmyself]

My last team had about 30 people in it, so chances of a birthday were greater than one every 2 weeks. Add to that people retiring, leaving and having kids etc then you were guaranteeing a card being passed around every week.
Complete shambles, worst part was having to think of a message to write in a card every few days but at least nobody knew if you contributed nothing to the kitty.

[Guest bernardblack]

48 minutes ago, ilostmyself said:

My last team had about 30 people in it, so chances of a birthday were greater than one every 2 weeks. Add to that people retiring, leaving and having kids etc then you were guaranteeing a card being passed around every week.
Complete shambles, worst part was having to think of a message to write in a card every few days but at least nobody knew if you contributed nothing to the kitty.

I love reading the messages in the cards though...”can’t believe you’re going, won’t be the same without you...we’ll definitely stay in touch” etc etc...usually a lot of nonsense 

 

 

 

[Hillonearth]

4 hours ago, thistledo said:

I agree with the work collections being murder. The last actual office I had worked in had them regularly, some c**t you don't know is leaving another c**t you met two weeks ago is having a birthday, someone is returning to work, someone bought a new house. Honestly I've never seen the point of it. Any time I've left a place I've just left without a fuss, it's just a fucking job. 

Although, I did leave a well known distillery with a £100 Amazon voucher and a shit load of booze, bags of the stuff. Which is probably the best leaving present I've ever had. Really surprised me because in general I think I'm a bit of a dick.

It's at its worst when you get a wee coven of wifies who grossly overestimate their own popularity and start trying to put sheets round for every minor life event one of them has....non-landmark birthdays/kids' christenings/flowers because one of their aunties has croaked etc. with ever-diminishing returns...you're virtually guaranteed a meltdown when they finally twig nobody really gives a f**k about them. We had one whose pals put round a sheet for the engagement, hen night, wedding and moving into a new house.

When the last one came round my boss asked me if they were likely to put another one round for the first time she let her man do her up the farter.

 

[Steve_Wilkos]

For birthdays we just pass a card around, and whoever had the birthday before brings the cake in. 

Seems to work.

[Bairnardo]

Birthday cards are a load of shite.

Every workplace iv ever had, the rule is if its your birthday, you bring some cake/sweeties or whatever in.

[KnightswoodBear]

7 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

Birthday cards are a load of shite.

Every workplace iv ever had, the rule is if its your birthday, you bring some cake/sweeties or whatever in.

Yep.  This is correct

[Derry Alli]

1 hour ago, Bairnardo said:

Birthday cards are a load of shite.

Every workplace iv ever had, the rule is if its your birthday, you bring some cake/sweeties or whatever in.

Same in mines. Have never seen a birthday card get passed around or donations. They're reserved for people leaving or going off on the sick/bereavement.