Jump to content

Work colleagues


Recommended Posts

Not had too many smelly folk at work (Although as a teacher there are a few classes where you need to leave the windows open even in winter as some of the lads haven't discovered deodorant yet - especially if they come up from doing PE) but there was one guy when I worked in England whose breath was absolutely reeking. I think he smoked roll ups and drunk loads of black coffee which didn't help but I always used to say that his breath stunk of dung. Not shit, but dung. It had a smell that was bad, but there was almost a hint of hay there too, like you'd get from a good dollop of dung. Weird, the things you remember.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not had too many smelly folk at work (Although as a teacher there are a few classes where you need to leave the windows open even in winter as some of the lads haven't discovered deodorant yet - especially if they come up from doing PE) but there was one guy when I worked in England whose breath was absolutely reeking. I think he smoked roll ups and drunk loads of black coffee which didn't help but I always used to say that his breath stunk of dung. Not shit, but dung. It had a smell that was bad, but there was almost a hint of hay there too, like you'd get from a good dollop of dung. Weird, the things you remember.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tonsillolith

ETA - I think these tonsil stones contain a lot of hydrogen sulphide which is responsible for the shitty/dungy smell.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Moving to a new office from Monday. Today was my last day working with one of my colleagues. This woman doesnt like me. I don't like her. Very few people do. She hasn't spoken with me for 2 1/2 weeks since our last meeting as a management team. This is the woman who will leave milk cartons containing varying states of cheese on the kitchen counter rather than binning them when she cleans out the fridge because "they need to learn".

She absolutely hates it when people move her stuff when she's not in. Would it be wrong of me to change the settings on her chair, move her monitor and generally mess up her stuff for her to come in to on Monday morning?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Moving to a new office from Monday. Today was my last day working with one of my colleagues. This woman doesnt like me. I don't like her. Very few people do. She hasn't spoken with me for 2 1/2 weeks since our last meeting as a management team. This is the woman who will leave milk cartons containing varying states of cheese on the kitchen counter rather than binning them when she cleans out the fridge because "they need to learn".
She absolutely hates it when people move her stuff when she's not in. Would it be wrong of me to change the settings on her chair, move her monitor and generally mess up her stuff for her to come in to on Monday morning?
Prise three or four keys off her keyboard and switch them about. None of the qwerty ones. Too obvious. Be amazed how much that fucks with people.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said:

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tonsillolith

ETA - I think these tonsil stones contain a lot of hydrogen sulphide which is responsible for the shitty/dungy smell.

 

Is that what @throbber had when he was teabagged?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

59 minutes ago, BallochSonsFan said:

Moving to a new office from Monday. Today was my last day working with one of my colleagues. This woman doesnt like me. I don't like her. Very few people do. She hasn't spoken with me for 2 1/2 weeks since our last meeting as a management team. This is the woman who will leave milk cartons containing varying states of cheese on the kitchen counter rather than binning them when she cleans out the fridge because "they need to learn".

She absolutely hates it when people move her stuff when she's not in. Would it be wrong of me to change the settings on her chair, move her monitor and generally mess up her stuff for her to come in to on Monday morning?

It would be wrong of you not to.

And even wronger of you not to come on here and let us all know about the aftermath. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Bairnardo said:

I can confirm that in the last six years I have formed the following evidence based assessments of Nationalities that I have worked with.

Nigerian : Lazy
Indian : Stubborn liars
French : Rude and arrogant
Dutch : Headstrong and racist
Italians : Rule breakers
Jocks : Thick
English : Racist
Chinese : Love the boaby
Welsh : Crabbit
Lithuanian : unknown
Irish : Jakies
Lebanese : Chancers
Romanians : Mental

*Each of these may be full and accurate descriptions of an entire race of people, or it might be a brief description of the individuals I knew who just happened to be from each of these countries. Apply sterotype at own risk

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Bairnardo said:

Na, just this one lass who apprently was fond of the pipe. But thats enough for me to know that hundreds of millions of them are like that. After all, it would explain why theres so many no?

She wasnt much of a wid FYI, but she had strikingly nice feminine hands, much like Knightswood Bear.

Chinese lass in my work is fond of it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, BallochSonsFan said:

Moving to a new office from Monday. Today was my last day working with one of my colleagues. This woman doesnt like me. I don't like her. Very few people do. She hasn't spoken with me for 2 1/2 weeks since our last meeting as a management team. This is the woman who will leave milk cartons containing varying states of cheese on the kitchen counter rather than binning them when she cleans out the fridge because "they need to learn".

She absolutely hates it when people move her stuff when she's not in. Would it be wrong of me to change the settings on her chair, move her monitor and generally mess up her stuff for her to come in to on Monday morning?

Put a piece of the stinkiest cheese possible on her desk and leave a message saying "I have learnt - Bye."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...