Work colleagues

[Ranaldo Bairn]

No far off it.

[M0rtonfc]

One of the complete weirdos I worked with in Inverness absolutely reeked.
ETA - Post from the P&B Gold thread
He also had the worst personal hygiene I've been exposed to. He stank of filth - sometimes it was like shit, sometimes like piss, sometimes musty. He didn't wash his clothes properly and once insisted that the brown mark on his white shirt was a design (he emailed this to our team of 20 odd people). He just reeked, it was indesribably awful, boke inducing. He smelled like the girls in FF's favourite Nightshift video. He had weird greasy hair an dyellow teeth.

By any chance did this person have long back hair in a ponytail and a black Metallica t-shirt of some sort on? We have a few of those smelly c***s at Cappielow

[mizfit]

Without wanting to go into too much detail in case the fucker posts on here, is reeking of BO and pish grounds for refusing service to a customer?
I'm talking about such an overpoweringly terrible stench that other customers will leave the shop when he walks in.

I got paranoid one day at work last week because I’d been running late and couldn’t remember if I had put deodorant on or not.

As soon as I had that thought all I could smell was my body and had to go buy a can from the shops on my lunch.

[D.A.F.C]

1 minute ago, ali_91 said:

 

You’ve been bullied out of every job you’ve ever held to be fair, maybe you should start acting more like your Indian colleagues. 

One job out of several and I left of my own accord. The manager was punted a few months later when he started on someone else.

Why don’t you f**k off, I went through hell on a daily basis you c**t.

[D.A.F.C]

Just now, ali_91 said:

Stop being a racist bellend and i’ll f**k off, how about that? 

What’s racist about me describing one or two people I’ve dealt with? I said it was a generalisation and obviously not everyone from that region.

I’m sure I’ve just been unlucky but it’s infuriating to see lazy people do well purely down to creeping to superiors. It seems like the other poster experienced the same thing. With the amount of clever Indians working in healthcare it’s obviously not a cultural thing. I can only describe my experience.

[D.A.F.C]

49 minutes ago, ali_91 said:

‘Seems to be a trait of Indians from my experience.’ 

‘The ones I’ve dealt with are lazy, devious sycophants.’ 

The fact you think their nationality is relevant is blatantly racist. Adding ‘I’m sure they’re not all like that,’ does not excuse the rest of your horrific posts. 

Did you not also make a sweeping generalisation about me? I find that racist.

Can I just say that if you find what I said offensive then I apologise. Please also understand that I will react badly to being accused of somehow bringing the treatment I got on myself and that I deserved it. I have carried on some of the anger and search for justice and work incredibly hard to prove myself every day and perhaps seeing others slack off has meant I’ve had a go at them in here. Obviously I’m not saying over a billion people are the same ffs.

Edited February 6, 2019 by D.A.F.C

[Cerberus]

The rule of thumb is that northern Indians are fine and southern Indians are arseholes.

 

If you meet an Indian who’s friendly and a decent laugh he’ll be from the north. If you meet an Indian who’s a p***k and rude as f**k he’ll be from the south.

 

This is generally accepted in India told to me by many Indians.

 

[Aidan]

One of the complete weirdos I worked with in Inverness absolutely reeked.
ETA - Post from the P&B Gold thread
He also had the worst personal hygiene I've been exposed to. He stank of filth - sometimes it was like shit, sometimes like piss, sometimes musty. He didn't wash his clothes properly and once insisted that the brown mark on his white shirt was a design (he emailed this to our team of 20 odd people). He just reeked, it was indesribably awful, boke inducing. He smelled like the girls in FF's favourite Nightshift video. He had weird greasy hair an dyellow teeth.

Sounds exactly like someone me and ah-dee worked with. The boy I'm speaking about also talked with a fake American accent despite being from Montrose, ate dried mealworms and used to regale us all with tales of paintings he had done substituting a paint brush for his penis.

[Florentine_Pogen]

24 minutes ago, Aidan said:

8 hours ago, ICTChris said:

 

Sounds exactly like someone me and ah-dee worked with. The boy I'm speaking about also talked with a fake American accent despite being from Montrose, ate dried mealworms and used to regale us all with tales of paintings he had done substituting a paint brush for his penis.

Jackson Bollock ?

[WeAreElgin]

What’s racist about me describing one or two people I’ve dealt with? I said it was a generalisation and obviously not everyone from that region.
I’m sure I’ve just been unlucky but it’s infuriating to see lazy people do well purely down to creeping to superiors. It seems like the other poster experienced the same thing. With the amount of clever Indians working in healthcare it’s obviously not a cultural thing. I can only describe my experience.

This is painful to read and I'd suggest you delete it

You will be aware that there are other cultures that do not have the same obsessive nature over work, right? Most of the guys I work with on a daily basis will do what they're told and f**k all else. Why should they?

[senorsoupe]

Haven't dealt with too many hygiene challenged colleagues in my career although there was one guy we had to have the deodorant talk with, was a bit awkward because he was genuinely a good worker and a nice guy, just smelled a bit. 

Worst place I worked was some call center where the criteria for getting a job was really low, here is a summary of reasons people got sacked

1. Wanking at his desk (sacked after his second offence , first time he got an official warning)

2. Pretending they were trying to unionize as a reason to miss work, their cunning plan involved standing around out front all day trying to get people to sign a union petition thinking they couldn't be sacked for this (they learned you could)

3. Stealing lunches

4. Shagging in the bathroom

5. Getting so high on lunch that they forgot how to operate the phones

6. An exasperated quality monitor telling someone that the reason their call scores were low was "because you touch yourself at night".  

Note: complete incompetence was not enough to get the sack. 

Edited February 6, 2019 by senorsoupe

[Dee Man]

5 hours ago, M0rtonfc said:

 

By any chance did this person have long back hair in a ponytail and a black Metallica t-shirt of some sort on? We have a few of those smelly c***s at Cappielow

 

Isn't that @Dunning1874's look? 

Not that I'm trying to stir anything, obviously. 

[Barry Ferguson's Hat]

One fat f**k of a superviser of mine used to get the chat about personal hygiene from time to time. 

On one unforgettable occasion I turned round to be met with the sight of him gingerly bending over to pick a box up from the ground. The exposed area of upper arse-crack would have been unwelcome enough, but his arse-crack happened to be caked in dried shite at the time. 

Harrowing. 

Edited February 6, 2019 by Barry Ferguson's Hat

[BallochSonsFan]

3 hours ago, senorsoupe said:

Haven't dealt with too many hygiene challenged colleagues in my career although there was one guy we had to have the deodorant talk with, was a bit awkward because he was genuinely a good worker and a nice guy, just smelled a bit. 

Worst place I worked was some call center where the criteria for getting a job was really low, here is a summary of reasons people got sacked

1. Wanking at his desk (sacked after his second offence , first time he got an official warning)

2. Pretending they were trying to unionize as a reason to miss work, their cunning plan involved standing around out front all day trying to get people to sign a union petition thinking they couldn't be sacked for this (they learned you could)

3. Stealing lunches

4. Shagging in the bathroom

5. Getting so high on lunch that they forgot how to operate the phones

6. An exasperated quality monitor telling someone that the reason their call scores were low was "because you touch yourself at night".  

Note: complete incompetence was not enough to get the sack. 

I thought that number 6 was why the dinosaurs died out?

[ah-dee]

is wanking at your desk not allowed? i thought if ot was "your desk" then that would be fine??

[ICTChris]

Posting about my smelly former colleague has reminded me of my previous post about some of my colleagues in Inverness, reproduced here:

 

I used to work with several beauts back in Inverness. One was a guy who was a kind of squat fat chap who claimed to have spina bifida so got work to buy him a super-duper chair with buttons and stuff. Obviously when we were nights we snaffled it and took turns to race around the place on it. Eventually he cottoned onto this and from then on got the security guard to lock it away at nights. He also used to carry one of those iron briefcase things to work and if he wasn't working he'd open it on his desk and rummage around in it, slamming it shut if he heard someone come near him. Once a team leader from our shift opened it when he was on his break and it was full of food packaging and sweetie papers He must have noticed that his briefcase was out of position (think the penguin in Misery) so he sent an email to everyone in the team saying that he was very disappointed and that if anyone wanted to look in his briefcase we should just ask him.

He also used to come into work insanely early, like six hours before his shift was due to start and just sat around. He was bizarrely keen and seemed to think this would do him good in his career. However, it didn't mainly because the manager of the place had to tell him to stop it as his 18 hour a day stints were threatening the insurance. His career prospects were probably more harmed by the fact that his ex girlfriend worked in the upstairs office and she had a restraining order against him due to the fact that he stalked her after they split up. This meant that he missed out on training courses and couldn't apply for any promotions as most of the interviews were done upstairs. How staying in the office for a ridiculous ammount of time would make his employers forget that they had a loon on the staff is beyond me. He was thick as horseshit anyway.

Another favourite was Neil, a guy I worked with after getting a promotion of sorts. Neil was an older guy, most of the people there were in their early 20's. He was about 45 and when I first joined the team he was pretty quiet but he was always keen on a night out. This was because he had a drink problem. He wouldn't drink all the time but if he got started he didn't finish for days/weeks/months. He took a holiday once and didn't come back to work for four or five months. The company couldn't contact him and after a month or so sentthe police round to check he wasn't dead. He admitted he had 'a problem' and was allowed back. That's when the fun really began.

When he came back he was quite different, he was obviously on medication to control his urges towards drinking and it turned him into a walking comedy sketch. He would jive across the office, call everyone man and constantly, I mean constantly, hum to himself. I used to sit next to him and it was like sitting next to a radio constantly tuned to Jazz FM. "Dooo bee doo doo doo bap doo wop doo waaaah" for every second of the 8 hour shift. He would also talk/sing to himself about what he was doing, as Swampy remembers. So if it was his week doing the morning reports you'd get "doo bee doo be dobeee, ahh'mmm doooooin the morning report, doop doo dee waaah".

Eventually he'd take things that were said or mentioned and work them into his routine. So if someone said "Who's coming fro lunch? I fancy a sandwich" you'd get about 30 seconds later "Lunchy lunchy woo beee doooo". This was noticed and we'd deliberately mentioning things completely out of context to get them into his songs. One notable occasion was when a mate of mine stood up apropos of nothing and said very loudly "GLOVES" and sat down. Thirty seconds later "gloves, wooo hoo dop yeah, gloves yeahh"

Neil eventually left, the company gave him an ace reference to get rid of him. On one of his drinking benders (which continued despite his treatment) he saw our line manager shopping with his wife and kids and followed him around Tesco shouting abuse, probably like thisL "dooo bee doo deee doo you are a c**toooo".

[ICTChris]

9 hours ago, M0rtonfc said:

By any chance did this person have long back hair in a ponytail and a black Metallica t-shirt of some sort on? We have a few of those smelly c***s at Cappielow

 

Absolutely not.  He wore business dress all the time, just unwashed with stains and streaks and, as mentioned above, he constantly stank of piss and shit.

[D.A.F.C]

The rule of thumb is that northern Indians are fine and southern Indians are arseholes.
 
If you meet an Indian who’s friendly and a decent laugh he’ll be from the north. If you meet an Indian who’s a p***k and rude as f**k he’ll be from the south.
 
This is generally accepted in India told to me by many Indians.
 

These guys must have been Sri Lankan then because they were total fannies.

[MEADOWXI]

8 hours ago, Cerberus said:

The rule of thumb is that northern Indians are fine and southern Indians are arseholes.

 

If you meet an Indian who’s friendly and a decent laugh he’ll be from the north. If you meet an Indian who’s a p***k and rude as f**k he’ll be from the south.

 

This is generally accepted in India told to me by many Indians.

 

You can pretty much say that for the UK too

[Mantis Toboggan]

5 hours ago, senorsoupe said:

Worst place I worked was some call center where the criteria for getting a job was really low, here is a summary of reasons people got sacked

1. Wanking at his desk (sacked after his second offence , first time he got an official warning)

Wait, you're not supposed to do that?

Edited February 6, 2019 by Mantis Toboggan