GTG_03 Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 7 hours ago, Mr Tourette said: I imagine a few can relate to this scenario Her: “Can you nip to the shop and get me milk and eggs?” Me: “No worries. Is there anything else we need?” Her: “No, that’s it” Me (back with milk and eggs): “Here you go” Her: “Did you get tomatoes?” Me: “No. You didn’t ask for tomatoes” Her: “But we’re out of tomatoes, you must have realised that!” Me: “I asked if you needed anything else and you said no” Her: “But you would have walked past the tomatoes to get to the milk. Did you not think then that we might need tomatoes?” Me: “I wasn’t going shopping. I just went to buy 2 items, like you asked me to” Her: “I should have gone myself” How can you walk past tomatoes if there were no tomatoes? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 I have managed to nip that calling me on the way home shite in the bud. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 6 minutes ago, Busta Nut said: I have managed to nip that calling me on the way home shite in the bud. Good. Fucking annoying. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 44 minutes ago, Dee Man said: I'm friends with a girl at work and we're arranging to go a run on our motorbikes:. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 22 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: What on Earth were you searching for when you found this? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Academically Deficient Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 20 minutes ago, MixuFruit said: Anonymously shop her to the polis for using her phone while driving. Indeed. Remember, if in doubt, ask yourself "in this situation, what would Lee Wallace do?" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distant Doonhamer Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 I imagine a few can relate to this scenarioHer: “Can you nip to the shop and get me milk and eggs?”Me: “No worries. Is there anything else we need?”Her: “No, that’s it”Me (back with milk and eggs): “Here you go”Her: “Did you get tomatoes?”Me: “No. You didn’t ask for tomatoes”Her: “But we’re out of tomatoes, you must have realised that!”Me: “I asked if you needed anything else and you said no”Her: “But you would have walked past the tomatoes to get to the milk. Did you not think then that we might need tomatoes?”Me: “I wasn’t going shopping. I just went to buy 2 items, like you asked me to”Her: “I should have gone myself”Me. “Correct”FTFY 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 4 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said: What on Earth were you searching for when you found this? Deeman, motorbike, friend, woman. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 2 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Deeman, motorbike, friend, woman. I got this. Bit on-the-nose, perhaps. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 4 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said: Bit on-the-nose, perhaps. I hope he wipes it off and cleans his helmet before he goes home To the wife 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 5 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: I hope he wipes it off and cleans his helmet before he goes home To the wife Div really needs to institute an AutoKenneth button. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 One from earlier (though far from new). She’s been out all day in the town with the bairn (no doubt seeing to more urgent B&M rose gold shit business). Comes home on the bus. Gets into the house. 10 minutes later: ”oh can you take me round to Tesco I need to get something” After being one the middle of Scotland’s fourth city for the best part of 5 hours, she needs to go to the shop for a bottle of fucking juice. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 Her: if you're through the house, can you get a towel for my shower please? Me: sure, here you go. Her: there's only one here. Me: "a towel" means one Her: You should know that I need an extra one for my hair Me: Just ask for two then Her: Why? Me: feels like... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 15 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: One from earlier (though far from new). She’s been out all day in the town with the bairn (no doubt seeing to more urgent B&M rose gold shit business). Comes home on the bus. Gets into the house. 10 minutes later: ”oh can you take me round to Tesco I need to get something” After being one the middle of Scotland’s fourth city for the best part of 5 hours, she needs to go to the shop for a bottle of fucking juice. Do you not have corner shops or petrol stations in Scotland's fourth city? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 3 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Do you not have corner shops or petrol stations in Scotland's fourth city? The city centre of Scotland’s fourth city has an abundance of corner shops and indeed, a Tesco Metro, let alone the burbs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 25 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: The city centre of Scotland’s fourth city has an abundance of corner shops and indeed, a Tesco Metro, let alone the burbs. Maybe if you confessed to her that cars have their own inbuilt cigarette lighting facility, she might be encouraged to get a driving license. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CountyFan Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 Anyone else dealing with the lockdown phenomenon that is "look at this place now doing takeaway!!!" We live in Larbert, I am not driving into Glasgow to get you brunch from that place on Instagram. Boot. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 1 hour ago, BigFatTabbyDave said: What on Earth were you searching for when you found this? You looking for tips? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 9 hours ago, Dee Man said: I did this very thing with a wedding gift we got for a weekend away on the date of our choice in a hotel in Castle Douglas. I booked it so that it coincided with The Dee playing QOS in Dumfries that Saturday. Tbf she thoroughly enjoyed it but was irrationally terrified of the Dundee lassies in the pub beforehand and it obviously showed as one came over and asked if she was OK. I don't know if she'd been watching The Firm or Green Street or something beforehand but she was waiting for it to kick off at any minute Off the top of my head I've did that in Dundee, Newcastle twice, Southerness, and most recently last month, in Pickering. I even got away with it booking a holiday a bit later to coincide with a Paphos game in Cyprus. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted October 13, 2020 Share Posted October 13, 2020 I used to phone @Rugster every night on the way home from work. I was on a bus through. A night one from Toryglen to Rutherglen that went through The Circus. I phoned him to make him feel guilty for not picking me up and/or to hear me getting murdered by the local junkies. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.thumb.jpeg.11f731b494e53900b96970bb0739e682.jpeg)
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.