PB1994 Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 (edited) We paused a programme we were watching on Netflix so I could go to the toilet and get a drink from the kitchen, away for around 2 minutes. 15 minutes later I am still waiting for us to continue watching as she has had to phone her mate to discuss complete nonsense while I was out of the room. Edited October 10, 2020 by PB1994 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heedthebaa Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 She’s watching a sitcom called Two Doors Down, she’s in hysterics which is obviously nice to see, but everytime she laughs the farts are flying out her 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alta-pete Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 9 minutes ago, heedthebaa said: She’s watching a sitcom called Two Doors Down, she’s in hysterics which is obviously nice to see, but everytime she laughs the farts are flying out her You’re lucky. I’m married to Cathy. (Not really. But near as if no difference). 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heedthebaa Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 6 minutes ago, alta-pete said: You’re lucky. I’m married to Cathy. (Not really. But near as if no difference). lucky man 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bernardblack Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 We paused a program we were watching on Netflix so I could go to the toilet and get a drink from the kitchen, away for around 2 minutes. 15 minutes later I am still waiting for us to continue watching as she has had to phone her mate to discuss complete nonsense while I was out of the room.Should’ve just started playing the programme again 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PB1994 Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 7 hours ago, bernardblack said: Should’ve just started playing the programme again Then she would be annoyed at me and I wouldn’t be able to tell a bunch of strangers on a Scottish football forum about it. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 19 hours ago, heedthebaa said: She’s watching a sitcom called Two Doors Down, she’s in hysterics which is obviously nice to see, but everytime she laughs the farts are flying out her If she finds it really hilarious does she shite herself? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heedthebaa Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 4 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: If she finds it really hilarious does she shite herself? I’m hoping we’re still a few years off that 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2lgm Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 21 years married and it’s now a habit that if we are having a lie in on the weekend one of us (generally me) has to get up at work o’clock to open the downstairs blinds so the neighbours think we’re not a pair of lazy b*****ds. What’s wrong with having a lie in and the neighbours knowing? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 5 minutes ago, 2lgm said: 21 years married and it’s now a habit that if we are having a lie in on the weekend one of us (generally me) has to get up at work o’clock to open the downstairs blinds so the neighbours think we’re not a pair of lazy b*****ds. What’s wrong with having a lie in and the neighbours knowing? Leave them open the night before. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 A wardrobe kind of fell on the wife’s head earlier when we were moving it down the stairs. It was fucking obvious the mechanics of the situation meant the wardrobe was going in her direction and yet she stood there and it landed on her dome. ”So you’re not going to apologise then”, 5 hours later. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 1 minute ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: A wardrobe kind of fell on the wife’s head earlier when we were moving it down the stairs. It was fucking obvious the mechanics of the situation meant the wardrobe was going in her direction and yet she stood there and it landed on her dome. ”So you’re not going to apologise then”, 5 hours later. Tell her you already apologised several times and she must be concussed if she can't remember 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 On 09/10/2020 at 21:43, PB1994 said: We paused a programme we were watching on Netflix so I could go to the toilet and get a drink from the kitchen, away for around 2 minutes. 15 minutes later I am still waiting for us to continue watching as she has had to phone her mate to discuss complete nonsense while I was out of the room. The other night she ran away to talk to her mum on the phone for 10 mins. I just carried on watching as I knew I’d be going to the shop for the same amount of time soon, so when she came back down I put the film back 10 mins and told her to watch on whilst I went to the shop. When I came back, she had it on pause at the point I left so I had to watch the same 10 mins all over again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 4 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said: Tell her you already apologised several times and she must be concussed if she can't remember The thing is she trapped a nerve in her neck last week and has been walking around like Sandi Toksvig and I think the dunt has cured it. She should be thanking me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 7 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: A wardrobe kind of fell on the wife’s head earlier when we were moving it down the stairs. It was fucking obvious the mechanics of the situation meant the wardrobe was going in her direction and yet she stood there and it landed on her dome. ”So you’re not going to apologise then”, 5 hours later. Once saw a girl run away from a giant tyre bouncing down the road / hill after it fell off a lorry. Most people would have simply moved to the side of the road and let it pass, but not this girl who ran down the middle of the road and inevitably got KO’d as it quickly caught up with the screaming wreck. @DA Baracus will be chuckling away at the memory of this. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted October 10, 2020 Share Posted October 10, 2020 1 minute ago, Hedgecutter said: Once saw a girl run away from a giant tyre bouncing down the road / hill after it fell off a lorry. Most people would have simply moved to the side of the road and let it pass, but not this girl who ran down the middle of the road and inevitably got KO’d as it quickly caught up with the screaming wreck. @DA Baracus will be chuckling away at the memory of this. Haha, I will never forget that! Was a huge tractor tyre as well! Thought she might have been killed but seemingly she was ok. One of the funniest things I've ever seen. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empty It Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 A wardrobe kind of fell on the wife’s head earlier when we were moving it down the stairs. It was fucking obvious the mechanics of the situation meant the wardrobe was going in her direction and yet she stood there and it landed on her dome. ”So you’re not going to apologise then”, 5 hours later. Poor murder attempt 5/10. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distant Doonhamer Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 21 years married and it’s now a habit that if we are having a lie in on the weekend one of us (generally me) has to get up at work o’clock to open the downstairs blinds so the neighbours think we’re not a pair of lazy b*****ds. What’s wrong with having a lie in and the neighbours knowing? Leave them open the night before.Indeed or as an alternative grow a pair. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 12 hours ago, 2lgm said: 21 years married and it’s now a habit that if we are having a lie in on the weekend one of us (generally me) has to get up at work o’clock to open the downstairs blinds so the neighbours think we’re not a pair of lazy b*****ds. What’s wrong with having a lie in and the neighbours knowing? Along similar lines, I could unexpectedly find myself in a town where a friend lives and be banned from a 'fly-visit' unless I give at least a couple of hours notice. Seems women have a fear of people visiting when the toilets haven't had a massive deep clean, scared of being seen as being manky. I wouldn't just randomly turn up on their doorstep, but faffing around for 2+ hours seems somewhat excessive when I could be home in that hanging around period. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 12 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: The thing is she trapped a nerve in her neck last week Have you had to light her fags off the cooker? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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