alta-pete Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 3 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Aye, that worked well the last time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Ferrino Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 9 hours ago, Barry Ferguson's Hat said: We had friends round last night and I got pretty drunk. I can remember everyone leaving but nothing thereafter. Woke up in the middle of the night to go for a pish and discovered that my darling copine wasn't in bed. Worried, I search the house and find her sleeping in the spare bedroom. She's insistent that she's not moving, so, naturally, I'm terrified I've done something really bad in the half hour or so between our guests leaving and us going to bed. I go downstairs this morning and she's still upset, saying I was really mean to her. After much apologising we're back on speaking terms and I'm able to find out exactly what happened. I called her 'a poo and a pee'. She'll be pissed off she's only realised that shes been getting balled by a Famous five character. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velo army Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 40 minutes ago, Adam said: My gf wanted to make dinner tonight, which is fine, as I’ve probably not had a night off from making dinner in at least 2 months, but it had to be a Sunday. My favourite meal of the week, one which I put hours of effort into making. She wanted to make steak pie, which was delicious tbf, but made mash rather than roast potatoes. I fucking hate mash potatoes. To make matters worse, she asked me to mash them as it’s too difficult, and no matter how much I battered f**k out of the spuds, they were still lumpy. Furious. Pass them through a sieve mate after you've mashed them. Rub them through with a wooden spoon then whisk with a wee bit of milk. Nae lumps. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 5 hours ago, Thorongil said: My wife has a weird and hugely irritating practice involving pillows.I sleep on 2 ordinary pillows. She sleeps on two other pillows which are just awful. Your head sinks right into them. She also though has two auxiliary pillows for watching TV or using the laptop in bed. Ok. Ok… So that’s 4 in use. So I’ll come up to bed and see my pillows are missing. She’ll be on the laptop or computer. I’ll go to the en suite for a pish and brush my teeth. I’ll make my way to the bed and start to climb in. Still no sign of my pillows, but I know where they are. She’ll continue to watch TV or look at her phone or laptop. I want to lie down but I have no pillows. I then lose my ability to mask my seethe and begin to sigh and huff. “OH ALRIGHT, IT’S YOUR PRECIOUS PILLOWS AGAIN IS IT?” These will then be pulled from under her and her other 4 pillows and haughtily cast on the bed. She’ll then storm off to the bathroom in a huff to brush her own teeth. I’m now the bad guy, for wanting to lie down on pillows on my own bed, at bedtime. Rinse and repeat. The worst thing about this, imo, is that she's warming the pillows. A cold pillow is the single best thing about climbing in to bed. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UsedToGoToCentralPark Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 The worst thing about this, imo, is that she's warming the pillows. A cold pillow is the single best thing about climbing in to bed. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Ferrino Posted October 31, 2021 Share Posted October 31, 2021 1 hour ago, die hard doonhamer said: The worst thing about this, imo, is that she's warming the pillows. A cold pillow is the single best thing about climbing in to bed. I'd sooner use a sand bag than a fluffy pillow. Fair play for having a bunk bed though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milton75 Posted November 1, 2021 Share Posted November 1, 2021 11 hours ago, Adam said: My gf wanted to make dinner tonight, which is fine, as I’ve probably not had a night off from making dinner in at least 2 months, but it had to be a Sunday. My favourite meal of the week, one which I put hours of effort into making. She wanted to make steak pie, which was delicious tbf, but made mash rather than roast potatoes. I fucking hate mash potatoes. To make matters worse, she asked me to mash them as it’s too difficult, and no matter how much I battered f**k out of the spuds, they were still lumpy. Furious. You fucking hate mashed potatoes. Mashed. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted November 1, 2021 Share Posted November 1, 2021 10 minutes ago, milton75 said: You fucking hate mashed potatoes. Mashed. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted November 1, 2021 Share Posted November 1, 2021 On one hand, I don't communicate enough. On the other, when I say "I'm off for my second shite of the day. I'll let you know how it goes." it's too much information. I wish she'd make her mind up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted November 1, 2021 Share Posted November 1, 2021 I'm sure "mash potatoes" is an Americanism. The Smash Martians probably picked it up from their TV broadcasts. I'm surprised Smash don't legally have to call it, "instant tuber substitute mash mix" anyway. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimbaxters Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 On 31/10/2021 at 22:05, velo army said: Pass them through a sieve mate after you've mashed them. Rub them through with a wooden spoon then whisk with a wee bit of milk. Nae lumps. Potato ricer is the only utensil required here. You're welcome. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 27 minutes ago, jimbaxters said: Potato ricer is the only utensil required here. You're welcome. One of these boys does the job 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 31 minutes ago, jimbaxters said: Potato ricer is the only utensil required here. You're welcome. 3 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: One of these boys does the job No need to be fucking about. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 I think I'd rather starve to death than buy frozen mashed potatoes tbqh. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velo army Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 28 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: One of these boys does the job You think the lad was just crushing them in his hands? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 11 minutes ago, velo army said: You think the lad was just crushing them in his hands? He was talking about battering f*** out of them, so I had no idea whether he was using his hands, a spoon, a mallet or what. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velo army Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 1 minute ago, Jacksgranda said: He was talking about battering f*** out of them, so I had no idea whether he was using his hands, a spoon, a mallet or what. Tennis racquet imo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 1 minute ago, velo army said: Tennis racquet imo Wouldn't surprise me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 47 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: One of these boys does the job Lightly done too, you don't want baby food. And some skin and lumps left from scrubbed tatties, and a big chunk of butter while you heat it back up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shipa Posted November 2, 2021 Share Posted November 2, 2021 7 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: He was talking about battering f*** out of them, so I had no idea whether he was using his hands, a spoon, a mallet or what. Battering? Was he planning to deep fry it? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.thumb.jpeg.11f731b494e53900b96970bb0739e682.jpeg)
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.