dogmc Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Went to Inverness High School. We had a deaf janitor that couldn't hear the bell go so just used to sit in his office drinking tea. The c**t was always late opening the tuck shop too and you couldn't ask for something when his back was turned as he couldn't lip read. Cue every student asking for a mars bar then when his back was turned adding in an insult. Shite behaviour looking back. Played against him at a teachers v pupils match in 6th year and the c**t was always going on mazy runs, then it clicked he wasn't hearing anyone shouting for the ball. I mind him. Was the assistant janny when I was there n the head one was a raging alky. Mind playing in goals in the 6th yr v teachers game. We were 5 nil up n the ref (old physics teacher can't mind his name) begged me to give away a pen so the teachers could have a sliver of respectability. I saw an English teacher ( Mr mckenzie I think was a shinty player who would get bit merry every lunchtime) come into the box. He'd been hacking at our players all day settling scores so I absolutely wiped him out and waited on ref to blow for a pen. He gave a corner and when I looked at him he shrugged and said 'aye well he's a can't tho'. [emoji2] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
California_Caley Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Primary 6 and 7, circa 1990. Nairn. Our teacher was a Yank with an incredible temper. Flying chairs all over the shop. Screaming tantrums, she would often end up lying on the floor screeching, banging the carpet with her fists and kicking. Unbelievable in retrospect, although I thought it was mighty entertainment at the time (I was one of the swots so rarely in the line of fire). Strangely, she kept her job and over the years since I am told has matured into a very good teacher. Amazing foresight by the headmaster. Doubt she'd get away with that now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomGuy. Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I used to faint at random intervals when I was that age. Collapsed in English one day, and seemingly my teacher at the time went absolutely mental at me for swinging on my chair and lashed a few things off his table, before realising I was unconscious. He was actually a pretty decent teacher tbf, think he got in tow with one of the students though, and eventually jamp off a bridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 13 minutes ago, RandomGuy. said: and eventually jamp off a bridge. Mods, please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I'm certainly glad I never became a teacher. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poet of the Macabre Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, RandomGuy. said: I used to faint at random intervals when I was that age. Collapsed in English one day, and seemingly my teacher at the time went absolutely mental at me for swinging on my chair and lashed a few things off his table, before realising I was unconscious. He was actually a pretty decent teacher tbf, think he got in tow with one of the students though, and eventually jamp off a bridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, RandomGuy. said: I used to faint at random intervals when I was that age. Collapsed in English one day, and seemingly my teacher at the time went absolutely mental at me for swinging on my chair and lashed a few things off his table, before realising I was unconscious. He was actually a pretty decent teacher tbf, think he got in tow with one of the students though, and eventually jamp off a bridge. He couldn't have been that decent an English teacher if you're using words like "jamp". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AyrshireTon Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, RandomGuy. said: I used to faint at random intervals when I was that age. Collapsed in English one day, and seemingly my teacher at the time went absolutely mental at me for swinging on my chair and lashed a few things off his table, before realising I was unconscious. I used to teach a fainter. Highly suspect though, that she kept landing in a perfectly safe position and not a bump or bruise (even once found on a set of stairs with her hands under her cheek). Total attention seeker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoapMactavish Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 On 29 August 2016 at 17:15, The Moonster said: There was a wee substitute teacher who used to come into Dumbarton Academy some times, I can't for the life of me remember his name (we'll call him Mr B for the sake of this), but he was quite a weird guy. He was really timid, balding on top, massive beard, spoke with a funny accent, but he was generally a nice guy. The bams in class would take full advantage of his vulnerability on many occasions, talking over him and generally bamming him up. One day a group of bams had decided they couldn't be arsed learning French and let Mr B know in no uncertain terms they would be doing f**k all for the duration of the lesson. He tried to get everyone to get on with their work but he was just so pathetic at telling people off and the rowdiness just kept building. Eventually a French dictionary was lobbed from one side of the class to another and all hell broke loose. There are now French dictionaries being lobbed left, right and centre and Mr B was frightened for his life. Rather than going to get the department head or head teacher to put an end to the madness, he decided that he'd hide under his desk and scream "NOT THE BOOKS! NOT THE BOOKS!". We had a History teacher called Mr Godfrey who was so straight faced, calm and collected that he could easily have been a serial killer. When folk were talking in class he wouldn't say anything, he'd slowly go into his drawer, quietly pull out a massive f**k off belt, smash it off a table then just stare at everyone. They eventually took the belt off him and he started using a tray full of rulers instead, which he would drop from above his head onto the floor, didn't quite have the same "oh f**k he's angry" effect to it but it was quite funny nonetheless. Not the books will live with me forever though, the panic in his voice will never be heard again. Mr B = Mr Paton, looked like a white Bin Laden ? I remember hearing about the dictionary incident. Also remember we had him covering our maths teacher being off the whole year in 3rd year, and we (the whole class) convinced him we had to leave as we had orchestra practice. Despite the fact I don't think the school even had an orchestra, and he wouldn't let people leave until they had told him what instrument they played Can't remember the head of physics name, but he was a buddie and used to give me hell in 6th year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 minute ago, SoapMactavish said: Mr B = Mr Paton, looked like a white Bin Laden ? I remember hearing about the dictionary incident. Also remember we had him covering our maths teacher being off the whole year in 3rd year, and we (the whole class) convinced him we had to leave as we had orchestra practice. Despite the fact I don't think the school even had an orchestra, and he wouldn't let people leave until they had told him what instrument they played Can't remember the head of physics name, but he was a buddie and used to give me hell in 6th year. Mr Paton it was! He really was in the wrong profession. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ranaldo Bairn Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 Jamp is standard #perthshire patois. I mind Mr Hunter (Billy Bunter) and Mr McLaren among many many more from Perth in the early 90's. On my first PE lesson after moving to PHS for S6 I scored a bullet header and a cracking left foot volley from a corner. Very out of character for me, but McLaren thought I was the bees knees after that, and every time I made my way into the box he'd bellow, full pelt, in his South East English accent, "Here he comes! Big *Robert!" Every single time. *Name changed to protect, eh, me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lionel hutz Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, RandomGuy. said: He was actually a pretty decent teacher tbf, think he got in tow with one of the students though, and eventually jamp off a bridge. When I was in S1 the Head of the Games (PE) Department had a relationship with a S6, he then shattered the bone in his foot when a light fitting to the squash courts fell on him and couldn't teach again. AFAIA He's still with the girl, I saw photos on Facebook last Christmas (which was when I was in S6) of them together at her families' pre-Christmas dinner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Saintee Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 3 hours ago, StandFree03 said: You'll probably mind Mad Miller the biology teacher? Mrs Dean letting folk smoke in class? I do Never had anything to do with Mrs Dean Sex Machine though. Didn't Miller get sent to prison for historic beastliness? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Saintee Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, StandFree03 said: McLaren was the best PE teacher, inifinitely better than Pate the chate anyway. Bully Bunter had a proper meltdown did he not? Assaulted a pupil in the car park? There were lots of rumours about the Hunter meltdown. Wee b*****d said I spoke French like Inspector Clouseau. One of my friends stepdad had a fight with Mr Whitehead in the school carpark! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davz93 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 1 hour ago, StandFree03 said: McLaren was the best PE teacher, inifinitely better than Pate the chate anyway. Bully Bunter had a proper meltdown did he not? Assaulted a pupil in the car park? Mr Hunter was a stand in German teacher at Crieff High when I was there. Would've been around 2005/6. He was a strange one. Threw a chair at the dividing wall between classes, prompting the head of French in the class next door to come in and see what all the commotion was about. Everyone in the class pointed to him and he went purple. Never saw him again after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 McLaren was the best PE teacher, inifinitely better than Pate the chate anyway. Bully Bunter had a proper meltdown did he not? Assaulted a pupil in the car park? Billy Bunter did have a meltdown in a classroom not long after I started. He'd grabbed a kids neck and threatened to kick his head in. I think that and the alleged incident in the lift was enough to make the school punt him finally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 32 minutes ago, Davz93 said: Mr Hunter was a stand in German teacher at Crieff High when I was there. Would've been around 2005/6. He was a strange one. Threw a chair at the dividing wall between classes, prompting the head of French in the class next door to come in and see what all the commotion was about. Everyone in the class pointed to him and he went purple. Never saw him again after that. How can I not remember a Mr Hunter? Can't really remember any teacher meltdowns at Crieff High when I was there. Most of the teachers were idiots who clearly should never had been teachers as they just couldn't relate to children at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogmc Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 When I was in S1 the Head of the Games (PE) Department had a relationship with a S6, he then shattered the bone in his foot when a light fitting to the squash courts fell on him and couldn't teach again. AFAIA He's still with the girl, I saw photos on Facebook last Christmas (which was when I was in S6) of them together at her families' pre-Christmas dinner Feck is a pre Christmas dinner?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 2 minutes ago, dogmc said: Feck is a pre Christmas dinner?? Dinner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jessmagic Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 18 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: Tbf, I don't think there was ever a ZickZack in the land which hadn't been adorned with swastikas and scribbley Hitler tashes, (one of which could have certainly made a decent SG Art & & Design portfolio). Zick Zack books - often thrown at bright eyed, idealistic German teachers straight out of university at St. Machar Academy, Aberdeen circa 1999. Often seemed to be language teachers who had a melt down. I don't know why it was compulsory for everyone to take a language up to second year (I think). This only led to resentment and demented kids taking it out on the teachers. Remember a Frau Luke who was actually subjected to horrific levels of bullying due to her "frog eyes" and often left the classroom in tears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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