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Heads Gone (The 8MileBU Awards)


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23 minutes ago, Falkirk09Bairn said:

More details  required for 1 and 4 if you don’t mind? He appears to be a very deranged individual. Allegation number 4 is particularly concerning. 

It was of their shoes IIRC, I'm sure someone with a better memory will remind me. Can't remember why he did it tbh.

For number 1, again, someone better than me will link the full post for you. In the shitting stories thread, maybe? 

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More details  required for 1 and 4 if you don’t mind? He appears to be a very deranged individual. Allegation number 4 is particularly concerning. 

Not sure about 4 but 1 is not 100% correct. I believe they were in a communal shower and someone pissed on him. To get back, he howked a bit of shite out his arse and flicked it at the person who pissed on him. He seemed to think this was hilarious until almost the whole world advised him that it was disgusting behaviour. He then changed his story and said he made it all up for banter. I don’t actually mind some of his posts but he rightly gets slagged for this on a regular basis. The shit flinging c**t.
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6 minutes ago, Dosser-fae-the-shire said:


Not sure about 4 but 1 is not 100% correct. I believe they were in a communal shower and someone pissed on him. To get back, he howked a bit of shite out his arse and flicked it at the person who pissed on him. He seemed to think this was hilarious until almost the whole world advised him that it was disgusting behaviour. He then changed his story and said he made it all up for banter. I don’t actually mind some of his posts but he rightly gets slagged for this on a regular basis. The shit flinging c**t.

Here it is from the bold 14mile himself (thanks to @Miguel Sanchez who had posted it on the "Tales of P&B past" thread"):

Everyone loves a jobby prank or a footballing jobby story! I can think of at least 3! Though the latter two are football-jobby-revenge stories lol! :) 1 - Playing against Addiewell Amateurs at their park about 5 year ago, they had this huge eared, ugly, muppet who was trying to be the hard man until a pathetic attempt of slide tackle saw him skinned, took him over the touch line, through a pile of dog sh*t that can only have been produced by a Labrador or larger dog. He then got up, shit all over his arm, hand and side of his light blue strip, watched a cross go in, a header put us 3-1 up, then got the worst barrage of laughter & ridiculing from everyone before demanding to be substituted, throwing top away and pissing-off home!! :D Big Ears The Muppet if you ever read this... G.I.R.F.U.Y ya f@nny!!! 2 - Team mate pissed over another team mate in showers after game. The pisser is quite a hairy fella. While the pisser was washing his hair, the pissed-upon proceeded to pick a nasty big winnit out his arse crack, waited til the pisser was walking out the showers then flicked it onto his back lol! 3 - Walking back to changing rooms after a game, hear my name shouted just behind me. So I turned round, heard 'Hows yer touch!!!??' Before taking a ball full in the nuts from about 5 feet away! Queue laughter from all! So into the changing rooms, and into the showers, which were individual cubicles. While behind the door, I squeezed out a decent enough sized jobby for not-really-needing, opened door, shouted 'Hows yet touch!!!??' and threw the turd at the offender, hitting his ponsy pink YSL shirt, leaving a decent brown skid on the shirt and a decent landing mark on his towel!!! Mick B if you read this... G.I.R.F.U.Y mate! ;)

"Everyone loves a jobby prank." My word. 

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Guest Bob Mahelp
28 minutes ago, JMDP said:

Here it is from the bold 14mile himself (thanks to @Miguel Sanchez who had posted it on the "Tales of P&B past" thread"):

Everyone loves a jobby prank or a footballing jobby story! I can think of at least 3! Though the latter two are football-jobby-revenge stories lol! :) 1 - Playing against Addiewell Amateurs at their park about 5 year ago, they had this huge eared, ugly, muppet who was trying to be the hard man until a pathetic attempt of slide tackle saw him skinned, took him over the touch line, through a pile of dog sh*t that can only have been produced by a Labrador or larger dog. He then got up, shit all over his arm, hand and side of his light blue strip, watched a cross go in, a header put us 3-1 up, then got the worst barrage of laughter & ridiculing from everyone before demanding to be substituted, throwing top away and pissing-off home!! :D Big Ears The Muppet if you ever read this... G.I.R.F.U.Y ya f@nny!!! 2 - Team mate pissed over another team mate in showers after game. The pisser is quite a hairy fella. While the pisser was washing his hair, the pissed-upon proceeded to pick a nasty big winnit out his arse crack, waited til the pisser was walking out the showers then flicked it onto his back lol! 3 - Walking back to changing rooms after a game, hear my name shouted just behind me. So I turned round, heard 'Hows yer touch!!!??' Before taking a ball full in the nuts from about 5 feet away! Queue laughter from all! So into the changing rooms, and into the showers, which were individual cubicles. While behind the door, I squeezed out a decent enough sized jobby for not-really-needing, opened door, shouted 'Hows yet touch!!!??' and threw the turd at the offender, hitting his ponsy pink YSL shirt, leaving a decent brown skid on the shirt and a decent landing mark on his towel!!! Mick B if you read this... G.I.R.F.U.Y mate! ;)

"Everyone loves a jobby prank." My word. 

Why have I never found this thread before ?

That's magnificent. 

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3 minutes ago, Bob Mahelp said:

Why have I never found this thread before ?

That's magnificent. 

It might be an unpopular opinion around here but that truly is an astounding read which I wouldn’t change for the world.

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1 hour ago, JMDP said:

Your patter is rank. Please stop. Anyway, a brief reminder that:

1. You responded to dressing room banter by shitting in your own hands and launching it at someone.

2. You got so raging at a poster that you set up a "fanny posters" PM group begging Celtic fans to dot him to "take him down a peg or two".

3. You had an issue with a poster, so made up horrendous allegations about him, and even - creepily - invented a nickname of "The Watcher" for him.

4. You took photos of kids in a fast food restaurant. 

5. You coined the term "Arsehole with AIDSy spunk in it"

6. You lost your head so badly at your big team losing, that you invented a person called Tony, shared fake screenshots of texts you sent to yourself with horrific banter to try and create a backstory (you utter psycho) all to falsely allege another poster of singing sectarian songs. 

7. "Alki junkie"

8. You assaulted a homeless person in front of your child. 

9. Your attempts to deflect behind your madness being an "online persona" to amuse your workmates. My word. 

The lengths you go to in trying to "take people down a peg or two" are frightening and your head is constantly some distance from your body. 

Not sure number 9 is fully correct either. That was during Skidgate, where he defended himself against the accusations by claiming it was an online persona, and that he would hate his workmates thinking he was like that in real life. The actual post got binned when that thread got tidied up in the middle of the scandal though, and to be honest, I'm not sure he comes out smelling of roses either way!

There is a small part of me that has a grudging admiration that someone with that sort of CV hasn't fucked off, or at least reinvented himself with a new account. The rest of me is certain it's the behaviour of a complete psychopath.

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49 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

Just remembered the time @Alan Stubbs found the alki junkie post. P&B has been all downhill since.

I will admit to a lot of the nonsense JMDP has listed in his bid to be in with the dregs, (minus the P&B embellishments)  but I will not admit to the one you‘ve listed. It gets conveniently forgot any time its been brought up that the poster on the receiving end of the pm where “alki junkie” was first used also confirmed it wasn’t me who’d sent it. It should also be noted that Alan Stubbs “evidence” was that I was the only person to have used said phrase so it must've been me, despite it being commonly used in discussion or on other platforms. Also there was some Hearts poster (username forgot) on here suggested Alan Stubbs had a Kickback alias and had pulled a similar stunt over there, though I won’t be supporting this claim.

Edited by 8MileBU
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16 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said:

Not sure number 9 is fully correct either. That was during Skidgate, where he defended himself against the accusations by claiming it was an online persona, and that he would hate his workmates thinking he was like that in real life. The actual post got binned when that thread got tidied up in the middle of the scandal though, and to be honest, I'm not sure he comes out smelling of roses either way!

There is a small part of me that has a grudging admiration that someone with that sort of CV hasn't fucked off, or at least reinvented himself with a new account. The rest of me is certain it's the behaviour of a complete psychopath.

The majority isn’t fully correct. 

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1 minute ago, Romeo said:

Didn't know about the taking pictures thing, worrying stuff.

You should have a think about your behaviour. 

You can pipe down. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind you’ll have photo albums full of all ages and sexes in Rangers tops.

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4 minutes ago, Romeo said:
18 minutes ago, 8MileBU said:
You can pipe down. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind you’ll have photo albums full of all ages and sexes in Rangers tops.

Oh dear.

He has a point tbf - you are a terrible individual. 

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2 hours ago, 19QOS19 said:
3 hours ago, JMDP said:
Your patter is rank. Please stop. Anyway, a brief reminder that:
1. You responded to dressing room banter by shitting in your own hands and launching it at someone.
2. You got so raging at a poster that you set up a "fanny posters" PM group begging Celtic fans to dot him to "take him down a peg or two".
3. You had an issue with a poster, so made up horrendous allegations about him, and even - creepily - invented a nickname of "The Watcher" for him.
4. You took photos of kids in a fast food restaurant. 
5. You coined the term "Arsehole with AIDSy spunk in it"
6. You lost your head so badly at your big team losing, that you invented a person called Tony, shared fake screenshots of texts you sent to yourself with horrific banter to try and create a backstory (you utter psycho) all to falsely allege another poster of singing sectarian songs. 
7. "Alki junkie"
8. You assaulted a homeless person in front of your child. 
9. Your attempts to deflect behind your madness being an "online persona" to amuse your workmates. My word. 
The lengths you go to in trying to "take people down a peg or two" are frightening and your head is constantly some distance from your body. 

I have to say that No. 6 on that list resulted in some of the funniest memes ever to grace this website so he should commended for his behaviour there...

Totally agree. Sometimes you need these horrifying incidents to boost the patter much like you needed the widescale brutality of the world wars to advance society.

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