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I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae ;)
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..

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I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..



You cannot leave it there RawB. What did you get locked up for?

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2 hours ago, RawB93 said:

I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae ;)
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..

I pm'd Jehst on facebook about 6 months ago to see where I could get a tshirt but the dick never got back to me.

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6 hours ago, RawB93 said:

I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae ;)
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..

Jail sounds shite.

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Due in court next month charged with Insurance Fraud and Animal Cruelty. Any of you fine chaps know a good solicitor?

G-Bo

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20 minutes ago, Grim O"Grady said:

Due in court next month charged with Insurance Fraud and Animal Cruelty. Any of you fine chaps know a good solicitor?

G-Bo

 

16 minutes ago, vikingTON said:

^^^ attention-seeker begging to play the 'victim' card

 

13 minutes ago, throbber said:

FFS Grimbo.

 

12 minutes ago, StandFree03 said:

Trying far, far too hard.

hahaha

G-Bo

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10 hours ago, RawB93 said:

I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae ;)
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..

:thumsup2

Although at this moment in time I don't think I could imagine anything worse I can understand people becoming institutionalised in the prison system.

Genuine question by the way, is it true that male rape isn't much of an issue in UK prisons?

Edited by Pete Rockwell

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About ten years ago someone posted a huge story about prison rape in the NSFW section, the life story of Donny the Punk.

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No because I'm not a complete reprobate. 

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12 hours ago, RawB93 said:

I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. I even got stuck in the digger with someone who had a swastika tattoo on his forehead.
Don't get me wrong, there were times I thought I was as close to hell on earth as possible. But there were other times where I've been crying with laughter, just having pure japes. Honestly, some of the funniest things I have ever seen have been in prison. Especially in Polmont. If you imagine every class clown, every jumped up ned in the country, crammed into one building.
Following on from someone else earlier in the thread r.e. single/double cell - to begin with I'd always want a cell mate. That way you're safe in the knowledge that you know at least one guy there. Someone to talk to, someone to help you get things and hopefully someone to have your back. This was until one guy with scabies, who I had to batter to get moved from my cell, though that's another story. Since then I've always been a single cell man. Everything in its right place - and fucking spotless tae ;)
It was a perversely satisfying experience, though - having your life simplified; systematic. Guaranteed 3 meals a day. Guaranteed fresh milk every morning at 6:30. You've got college/studies and the gym 5 days a week. Had my Jehst and Skinnyman cd's for when I wanted to get my headnod on. When I had little money for fags or toiletries I would sell artwork to get me by. I mean, other than friction between other inmates and anxious thoughts of the outside world/the future - it's a pretty stress-free existence. Everything is set out for you. The framework of a basic life exists for you to ride. And it will be there at the same times every single day.
f**k, I'm almost nostalgic thinking about it..

You're far from dense, going by how well you write and describe stuff so how did you manage to to get yourself into those situations leading to you being locked up so often? 

Also, was swastika boy from Falkirk/Camelon?

 

 

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:thumsup2

Although at this moment in time I don't think I could imagine anything worse I can understand people becoming institutionalised in the prison system.

Genuine question by the way, is it true that male rape isn't much of an issue in UK prisons?



Never once heard of it happening. Rape and (to a lesser extent) homosexuality still carries a stigma, in society in general. Anyone in prison for rape/pedophilia/hitting women will have horrible things done to them, just out of principal. That's if they're not already on protection. Although I have heard stories of inmates getting themselves put on the protection wing just so they can attack a beast...


You're far from dense, going by how well you write and describe stuff so how did you manage to to get yourself into those situations leading to you being locked up so often? 

Also, was swastika boy from Falkirk/Camelon?


Tony Elliot was his name. According to this article - http://m.eveningtimes.co.uk/news/13225582.7_years_added_to_thug_s_sentence_for_inmate_attack/ - he's from the Isle of Bute :lol: He's an absolute mentalist. He slashed another inmate then wrote him a letter saying 'sorry I didn't kill you'... Can read a bit about him slashing two screws here - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/prison-attack-by-walking-timebomb-razor-1084838#Bri6rsJYpOYMaltr.97

As for me.. It just wasn't a deterrent. When I was young, the things I did were probably for notoriety. Going to prison only validates that image, as stupid as that sounds to me now. It's almost like a badge of honour. Look at me - I survived Polmont. In fairness to the judicial system, they had exercised all possible alternatives to jail beforehand. When I'm in court for 100+ charges they have to be seen as sending out a message.

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5 minutes ago, RawB93 said:

 


Never once heard of it happening. 

 

That's why they call it 'surprise sex'. 

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7 minutes ago, RawB93 said:


As for me.. It just wasn't a deterrent. When I was young, the things I did were probably for notoriety. Going to prison only validates that image, as stupid as that sounds to me now. It's almost like a badge of honour. Look at me - I survived Polmont. In fairness to the judicial system, they had exercised all possible alternatives to jail beforehand. When I'm in court for 100+ charges they have to be seen as sending out a message.

 

I've known folk just like you describe the younger you, and folk who have used that same attitude to become big in business. A sort of "win at all costs", and it doesn't really matter what the game is. Must be some sort of strong risk taker gene.

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13 hours ago, RawB93 said:

I've somehow managed to end up in jail 5 times. All before I was 21. Perth and Polmont. I've been stabbed with a biro, sent someone to hospital and also learnt how to light a fag with a kettle. 

When you say "light a fag with a kettle", is this a euphemism or did you really set fire to a homosexualist with an electrical appliance?

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1 hour ago, NewBornBairn said:

When you say "light a fag with a kettle", is this a euphemism or did you really set fire to a homosexualist with an electrical appliance?

Pot, kettle, black. 

Was gonna say no smoke without fire but some c**t will remind me of the hoose. 

G-Bo

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