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Red Motorbike 2up, A92 just north of Montrose


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My missus is a bit snooty, what's the best colour Kia I should get her?


Orange. That's a Kia Ora.

meanwhile police have issued a photo of this red motorbike menace:


(one for the Glen Michael's Cartoon Cavalcade kids there..)

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As a regular pedestrian I'd like to moan about the following:

Drivers, please remember to use your indicators when turning a corner. We're not fucking psychic.

Cyclists, decide whether or not you're a road user or a pedestrian. If you're a road user then don't merrily sail through junctions when pedestrians are crossing. Of course, you are not a couple of tons of truck but you are a road user. Act like one and respect pedestrians in case you meet the pedestrian who pounds you and your selfish lycra clad fud/hipster escapee from Amsterdam routine* stupid fucking melt into the road.

Thank you.

*I am passionate about such things.

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I Ran over and killed a pigeon the other day. There was two pigeons on the road and I slowed down as I approached the said birds. 99 times out of hundred the birds fly away unharmed. I honestly couldn't believe it when I felt I had ran over something and my suspicions were confirmed when I looked in the mirror and saw a mass of feathers floating to the ground and a flat pigeon on the ground. I was going to stop and investigate but I remembered someone in a house nearby kept pigeons and I wasn't sure if the pigeon was wild or not.

This is the second pigeon I have killed in similar circumstances, I'm really going to start to watch what I'm doing. Pesky animals

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The other day, my son was eating a red lolly when he was run over by a yellow lorry. I have a Jonathon Ross-style speech impediment and the coroner was Chinese. What a carry-on that was!

You mean a 'cawwy on' or a 'cally on' suwely...? Edited by RoversMad
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