die hard doonhamer Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 On 03/12/2019 at 15:32, G_Man1985 said: On 02/12/2019 at 23:57, die hard doonhamer said: Booked in for this on Wednesday. NHS in my area have a massive backlog so I've been passed over to a private clinic in Edinburgh, which has the added bonus that it'll be done under general anesthesic rather than local! How much you paying for private ? Or is it you pay f**k all as being passed over? Covered by the NHS. 20 hours ago, stimpy said: A general isn't a bonus, it has its own complications and can make you a bit vomity when you come round. A local is the job, couple of wee jabs and ten minutes later you're supping tea and wondering what all the fuss was about. Was a little bit nauseous, just slept it off this afternoon. Definitely glad it was done under general. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 1 hour ago, stimpy said: 13 hours ago, Rugster said: I think most people would consider it a bonus in this instance. f**k being awake when they’re about your bits with a scalpel. You don't see anything, you are tilted back while lying flat, really it's nothing. It’s not seeing it that would bother me. It’s the pulling and tugging. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 It’s not seeing it that would bother me. It’s the pulling and tugging. The nurse whose sole job it is to make small talk with you is the worst, as you lie there with your tackle front and centre. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stimpy Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 It’s not seeing it that would bother me. It’s the pulling and tugging. My surgeon was a true gent, gentle hands of a professional 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dosser-fae-the-shire Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 The nurse whose sole job it is to make small talk with you is the worst, as you lie there with your tackle front and centre. She spent most of her time mopping the tiny wee pools of sweat which kept forming in my palms. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted December 4, 2019 Share Posted December 4, 2019 3 hours ago, Bairnardo said: The nurse whose sole job it is to make small talk with you is the worst, as you lie there with your tackle front and centre. If you go private, she's giving you a blowjob to distract you. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted December 5, 2019 Share Posted December 5, 2019 If you go private, she's giving you a blowjob to distract you. Now that’s got to be a load of old cock.....surely this fellatrix would be impeding the surgeon ? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted December 5, 2019 Share Posted December 5, 2019 7 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: Now that’s got to be a load of old cock.....surely this fellatrix would be impeding the surgeon ? Do you really think a nursing degree would take 3 years? 2nd year students sent to Japan to study under Geishas. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 25 years ago, but the memory's still vivid. Local anesthetic . . . tugging, pulling, snipping (all of which I was acutely aware of but no pain) . . . all over in 15 min. Wheeled into a ward, cup of tea, kicked out of bed as soon as the tea was finished and told to get dressed and go home. Had to go for a piss before I drove home and found everything down there to be completely numb. All of said piss ended up on my jeans, none of it in the urinal. Drove home in my pants, back to work the next day. No after effects, but the numbness did take a day or two to go away. No regrets. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: 25 years ago, but the memory's still vivid. Local anesthetic . . . tugging, pulling, snipping (all of which I was acutely aware of but no pain) . . . all over in 15 min. Wheeled into a ward, cup of tea, kicked out of bed as soon as the tea was finished and told to get dressed and go home. Had to go for a piss before I drove home and found everything down there to be completely numb. All of said piss ended up on my jeans, none of it in the urinal. Drove home in my pants, back to work the next day. No after effects, but the numbness did take a day or two to go away. No regrets. Not even pishing yourself? Edited December 8, 2019 by Sergeant Wilson 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Not even pishing yourself? Technically, I didn't pish myself. I presented myself at a urinal at a time and place of my choosing, went through the controlled procedure of unzipping and aiming, allowed the outflow to commence only when I was sure all safety checks had been made. My only mistake was staring at the wall while I was pishing. There was just no feeling. No feeling whatsoever. Similar to trying to drink something after a visit to the dentist. Edited December 8, 2019 by oldbitterandgrumpy 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 17 minutes ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: Technically, I didn't pish myself. I presented myself at a urinal at a time and place of my choosing, went through the controlled procedure of unzipping and aiming, allowed the outflow to commence only when I was sure all safety checks had been made. My only mistake was staring at the wall while I was pishing. There was just no feeling. No feeling whatsoever. Similar to trying to drink something after a visit to the dentist. ^^^pished himself. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin.Hood Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 Technically, I didn't pish myself. I presented myself at a urinal at a time and place of my choosing, went through the controlled procedure of unzipping and aiming, allowed the outflow to commence only when I was sure all safety checks had been made. My only mistake was staring at the wall while I was pishing. There was just no feeling. No feeling whatsoever. Similar to trying to drink something after a visit to the dentist. ^^^^ pished himself 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 Well, I've got another appointment at Forth Valley Hospital coming up after the pain from my vasectomy 20 years ago started getting worse. As I've posted before, the tied tubes have become unravelled - the nurse described it as feeling like a "bag of worms". They've developed cysts and the veins have become varicose so now I need to have a scan to check how bad it is and to see if there are tumours. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 3 hours ago, G_Man1985 said: 7 hours ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: Technically, I didn't pish myself. I presented myself at a urinal at a time and place of my choosing, went through the controlled procedure of unzipping and aiming, allowed the outflow to commence only when I was sure all safety checks had been made. My only mistake was staring at the wall while I was pishing. There was just no feeling. No feeling whatsoever. Similar to trying to drink something after a visit to the dentist. ^^^^ pished himself Says the guy who's pishing himself at the thought of going through with it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 31 minutes ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: Says the guy who's pishing himself at the thought of going through with it. Shut up pishy! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 1 hour ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Shut up pishy! Aye, fair enough. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 8, 2019 Share Posted December 8, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Shut up pishy! Actually . . . thinking about it . . . For the cost of one piss stained pair of jeans (washed. dried, wearable the next day) I gained a guaranteed paternity free shagging licence. Edited December 8, 2019 by oldbitterandgrumpy 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbitterandgrumpy Posted December 9, 2019 Share Posted December 9, 2019 24 minutes ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: Actually . . . thinking about it . . . For the cost of one piss stained pair of jeans (washed. dried, wearable the next day) I gained a guaranteed paternity free shagging licence. So, Sergeant Wilson and G-Man, kindly point out the downside of having your inner tubes pulled twisted and bruised. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 9, 2019 Share Posted December 9, 2019 4 minutes ago, oldbitterandgrumpy said: So, Sergeant Wilson and G-Man, kindly point out the downside of having your inner tubes pulled twisted and bruised. Lucky nobody asked your Dad that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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