cracowjambo Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 Well, now you mention it, not being able to stare at the streetlights from an overly bright and draughty kitchen has had a seriously detrimental affect on my quality of life. And to think, I only had to pay Scottish Power an extra £800 a year for the privilege. What a fool I feel. Your saving 800 a year? How big is your house for your bills to be over that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funky Nosejob Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 Your saving 800 a year? How big is your house for your bills to be over that? 4 bed Edwardian semi in a conservation area. Walls are solid, so cavity wall insulation isn't available, and no chance of getting permission for uPVC double glazing units. Last year, we paid about £2500. Spent about £300 on improvements this year and on target to save about £800. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funky Nosejob Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 Hopefully you have closed down the East Wing for the winter. I would, but that's the servants' living quarters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gav-ffc Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 Get some candles on the go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 I've not seen DA post today I think he's frozen to death at least he froze sperm before he died so he can live on, They just need to scrape it off his belly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jock001 Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 I've not seen DA post today I think he's frozen to death at least he froze sperm before he died so he can live on, They just need to scrape it off his belly. Maybe he's Craig whyte. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 Maybe he's Craig whyte. Ran off to Mexico with a suitcase of tesco value biscuits? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 I've not seen DA post today I think he's frozen to death Get some candles on the go. Candlelight vigil may not be appropriate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 As Spike Milligan said "Stand nearer Africa- it's warmer" My Grandma used to say shit like that but she wasn't trying to be funny. "Come and sit over here, you're closer to the sun." "I don't think 6 feet either way will make much of a difference to my suntan Grandma." Anyway, back to the OP. Bubblewrap taped over the windows makes a good insulator. Of course, you can't see out but nothing ever happens on your street anyway. Walk around the house with a lit candle. Watch to see where the flame flickers to trace draughts and stop them up. Particularly check doors, windows and around the skirting board. Hang a sheet or better yet, a blanket over the biggest windows at night. Find someone with whom to snuggle. If they're sexually attractive, that's great but if not, well how badly do you want to be warm? Go and visit other people. After a minute or so, say "Jesus it's freezing in here. Could you turn the heat up a bit?" Don't leave until you have to. You may find your circle of friends will dwindle after a while but hopefully the weather will have warmed up a bit by then. Wash your feet in warm water and put on clean socks before you go to bed. Lastly, always cook over an open fire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 My Grandma used to say shit like that but she wasn't trying to be funny. "Come and sit over here, you're closer to the sun." "I don't think 6 feet either way will make much of a difference to my suntan Grandma." Anyway, back to the OP. Bubblewrap taped over the windows makes a good insulator. Of course, you can't see out but nothing ever happens on your street anyway. Walk around the house with a lit candle. Watch to see where the flame flickers to trace draughts and stop them up. Particularly check doors, windows and around the skirting board. Hang a sheet or better yet, a blanket over the biggest windows at night. Find someone with whom to snuggle. If they're sexually attractive, that's great but if not, well how badly do you want to be warm? Go and visit other people. After a minute or so, say "Jesus it's freezing in here. Could you turn the heat up a bit?" Don't leave until you have to. You may find your circle of friends will dwindle after a while but hopefully the weather will have warmed up a bit by then. Wash your feet in warm water and put on clean socks before you go to bed. Lastly, always cook over an open fire. Carbon monoxide alert. Don't close up fresh air (adventitious air) entering your dwelling if you are using an open flued gas appliance, gas cooker/hob/ oven and an open fire. You have been warned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Candlelight vigil may not be appropriate. A shrine with pictures of things that remind us of the man would be a nice tribute I will start Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Close up all flues and turn on the gas without lighting it. It won't keep you wamr, but it will save P&B from your endless shite threads, DA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Close up all flues and turn on the gas without lighting it. It won't keep you wamr, but it will save P&B from your endless shite threads, DA. Don't speak ill of the dead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTJohnboy Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Simple and cheap. Why does it need fork handles? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 My jakiness was compounded today when I bought a 59p multi pack of Tesco Basics 'assorted snacks' using 2p pieces. This will form much of my sustenance tomorrow. Friday, payday, can't come soon enough. Right cunto, tell us what you're having for lunch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Right cunto, tell us what you're having for lunch. Rat with a side of grass and leaves with a nice glass of puddle water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 I dined like a king Bacon double cheeseburger meal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 I dined like a king Bacon double cheeseburger meal Did you buy more biscuits? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
54_and_counting Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Masturbate furiously. he already does, didnt you see the part about using old football socks as draft excluders Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Eat peppermints then exhale a lot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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