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Now these are spiders that will scare more than Little Miss Muffet. Redbacks, always find them around the garden, garage, shed plus on the cricket pitch as that's the nickname of the South Australian Cricket team. White tails, see them in the house at times but not for a few years. Sydney funnel-web, thankfully only in Swarley land.

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Was driving down the A9 with a busload of folk two weeks ago, the bus in question had become home to a spider who would make his Web across the doorframe at night so when you got in in the morning you got a face full of web. Anyway as I was driving down the road I went to put the sun - visor down and remembered reading about the number of folk in Australia who crash their cars and die when they flip their visors down only for a huge spider to fall out on to their lap. I hesitated a wee bit as I put the visor down, had a wee laugh & felt relieved we have nothing like that here.

20 seconds later this fucking raisin with legs drops right in front of my face on a strand of web, 6 inches from my nose. "Shat it" is an understatement, the spider was humanely crushed to death in a hand full of tissue.

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Glad I opened this thread.
Only 4 weeks until I go to Australia.
I fucking hate spiders.

Of all the venomous Aussie spiders posted here, you'll probably be freaked out more by the completely harmless huntsman.

I say harmless, they do kill people by hidinh under your car sun visor and causing you to crash.

Also, the bits people normally call fangs, aren't fangs. They are called pedipalps or palps and male spiders use them for reproduction.

That means when you thin they're gonna eat you.they're actually gonna rape you.

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Seen a couple of big house spiders lately but nothing unusual, I don't mind them really. It's the feckers outside building huge webs across my path and in front of the garage door that have me seething. I tried to take a photo the other day of a rather impressive one outside the front door but it didn't show it very well - the web was strung between a low hedge and the phone line up at chimney height, must have taken the wee bassa days to build it. He was sitting right in the middle looking smug as f**k with about 200 various bugs stuck all over it.

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There's a pretty beastly spider that's currently living in the wing mirror of my car. I can't get near it without taking the glass out of the wing mirror which would be a hassle for me. So instead, every morning, I have to go round the outside of the car breaking its newly formed mansion web.

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Seen a couple of big house spiders lately but nothing unusual, I don't mind them really. It's the feckers outside building huge webs across my path and in front of the garage door that have me seething. I tried to take a photo the other day of a rather impressive one outside the front door but it didn't show it very well - the web was strung between a low hedge and the phone line up at chimney height, must have taken the wee bassa days to build it. He was sitting right in the middle looking smug as f**k with about 200 various bugs stuck all over it.

Basically a munchy box for the spider.

Also flies are designed to sense when something is about yo squash them hence why you find it so hard to swat one the b*****ds yet non of their evolutionary process has ever resulted in them having some sort of sense of fucking spider webs or developed some sort of way to get out of one.

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The Daily Star is even worse.

They have very regular articles on a different species which is set to invade Britain. Spiders, Giant/Mutant Rats, Hornets, Wasps, Snakes etc.

I remember back in the 80s, when taking a short breather from shitting my pants about the nukes that were going to drop from the sky at any moment, being terrified reading about the plague of giant locusts that were on their way from Africa. With these stories I have this image in my head of some deranged, lunatic sub-editors working in sunless rooms, moving around the room like chimp-meerkat crossbreeds, mad scribblings all over the walls with sketches of all kinds of mythical beasties scaling Buckingham Palace and performing lurid acts on butlers.

Edited by banana
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Sydney funnel-web, thankfully only in Swarley land.

Yep, there was a story in the local rag at the weekend warning everyone to be on the look out for them.

As the weather warms up the males start to wander about looking for females. Apparently my suburb is ground zero for these horney wee fuckers.

Edited by Swarley
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There's a pretty beastly spider that's currently living in the wing mirror of my car. I can't get near it without taking the glass out of the wing mirror which would be a hassle for me. So instead, every morning, I have to go round the outside of the car breaking its newly formed mansion web.

Apparently if you get a blade of grass and let it wobble about in the wind then press against the web the spider thinks it's an insect and will come out.

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There's a pretty beastly spider that's currently living in the wing mirror of my car. I can't get near it without taking the glass out of the wing mirror which would be a hassle for me. So instead, every morning, I have to go round the outside of the car breaking its newly formed mansion web.

I was going through the same and the advice above is the best way to get rid of them. I dropped some fluff onto the web and he came out no problem to attack it. I decided to keep him there for a while though, observe him and see what he was up to. I noticed that he learned pretty quickly, the first day he had attached his web directly to my drivers window so when I rolled down the window to let some air in his web was destroyed. Next day I look and he's done another web but this time he's done it onto the frame of the door, meaning I can roll down my window without destroying his web. Spiders are smart is the conclusion I've come to.

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Encountered an improbably large spider on the wall of my home office the other night. At first all I heard was this weird crinkling noise and assumed the window was open and the wind had caught something, but the window was shut. Then I realised it was actually the footsteps of this mammoth arachnid beast stalking its way across one of the posters on my wall. I usually catch-and-release with a cup and piece of paper, but the legspan on this thing was of such prodigious proportions that I had to use a ceramic vase to capture it in. Went to fling it out of the window and never saw it drop. It may still be inside the house somewhere, less than pleased with me.

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That spider isn't very big, saw a few big hunstmans in Australia - compared to ones here they are massive because the ones you see here you put them into a glass with a bit of paper but the ones there wouldn't fit into any glass that you would normally find around the kitchen so you would need to usher them out the door by other means

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I see your cute little spiders and raise you ...

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There was a deid wasp hanging from a bit of web on the washing line the other day. It's almost as if it had been caught, the spider had tried a nibble and like a child forced to eat sprouts said "yuck" and left it. If even spiders don't like wasps what use are they?

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