Pub Etiquette

[D.A.F.C]

5 hours ago, TheScarf said:

Well folks it's that time of year again.  Thought I'd resurrect this thread with what I've just posted in PTTGOTN - 

Was out for a few hours on Saturday night, was about 7 so the pub I was in wasn't too busy so only one barmaid was serving, the others were moseying about serving meals etc.  There was a group of 5 lads in and they all walked up to the bar just as I went to get me and my mate a pint.

All 5 of the virgins ordered and paid for their single Vodka and Red Bull separately.  I did joke and say to shout over to me next time they're going to the bar so I can nip over and get served first.  Fucking goons.

 

[The_Kincardine]

33 minutes ago, Flybhoy said:

People who, when there is a singer/guitarist on wander up and demand the microphone so they can drunkenly murder some song by Robbie Williams or Coldplay or some fucking shite like that and then get all offended, aggressive even when they are told firmly NO.

Having done acoustic pub sets for just a few quid from time to time this is highly annoying, ignorant and obnoxious, the whole pub doesn't want to hear me strum the chords to 'Angels' while you screech down the microphone your horrific version of it cos your bird pure loves that song so she does.

Caught on camera

[Hammer Jag]

I walk past that character every other day and the temptation to take a penalty kick at his head is growing.

[Flybhoy]

2 minutes ago, Hammer Jag said:

I walk past that character every other day and the temptation to take a penalty kick at his head is growing.

Any Celtic player trying that would probably miss right now to be honest. 

[The_Kincardine]

3 hours ago, Trackdaybob said:

I'm surprised they go to the bar as that would mean actually interacting with another human being. I would have thought they would have used an 'app' or something  

Parenting, Bob.  My son turned 18 in October so a few of us went to the pub and made sure he learned how to buy a round.  Just as important as knowing how to use a condom IMO.

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

3 minutes ago, The_Kincardine said:

Parenting, Bob.  My son turned 18 in October so a few of us went to the pub and made sure he learned how to buy a round.  Just as important as knowing how to use a condom IMO.

Did you wash your hands afterwards?

[Trackdaybob]

4 hours ago, UsedToGoToCentralPark said:

Wetherspoon's have that exact app

Hmmmm maybe I'll try it  

[mrcat1990]

I walk past that character every other day and the temptation to take a penalty kick at his head is growing.

He got lifted a wee bit ago trying to rape someone off Buchanan St and I haven't seen him about since. Where is he now?

[Guest bernardblack]

Well folks it's that time of year again.  Thought I'd resurrect this thread with what I've just posted in PTTGOTN - 
Was out for a few hours on Saturday night, was about 7 so the pub I was in wasn't too busy so only one barmaid was serving, the others were moseying about serving meals etc.  There was a group of 5 lads in and they all walked up to the bar just as I went to get me and my mate a pint.
All 5 of the virgins ordered and paid for their single Vodka and Red Bull separately.  I did joke and say to shout over to me next time they're going to the bar so I can nip over and get served first.  Fucking goons.

Did they form a queue in the form of a checkout? Seeing that a lot which is nothing short of infuriating

[TheScarf]

2 minutes ago, bernardblack said:

 

Did they form a queue in the form of a checkout? Seeing that a lot which is nothing short of infuriating

 

No just along the bar.  That weird phenomenon is reserved for the Wetherspoons only in Inverness.

[ONeils4Oyarder]

10 hours ago, Hammer Jag said:

I walk past that character every other day and the temptation to take a penalty kick at his head is growing.

He's a total and utter arsehole

[smpar]

I’ve come across a few sound c***s recently who have done the “he was first” gesture when the server has gone to serve them first. Can’t wait for Christmas party c***s to completely ignore this beautiful piece of pub etiquette because their need for a bottle of Corona simply can’t wait any longer.

[Boghead ranter]

1 hour ago, smpar said:

Can’t wait for Christmas party c***s to completely ignore this beautiful piece of pub etiquette because their need for a bottle of Corona simply can’t wait any longer.

Or those daft bints that either wave a banknote at the staff, or worse, snap their fingers.

As you say, have an awareness of who was already waiting when you came up to the bar, you'll get served in turn. Good bar staff know who's next (99% of the time)

Edited December 11, 2018 by Boghead ranter

[TheScarf]

1 hour ago, smpar said:

I’ve come across a few sound c***s recently who have done the “he was first” gesture when the server has gone to serve them first. Can’t wait for Christmas party c***s to completely ignore this beautiful piece of pub etiquette because their need for a bottle of Corona simply can’t wait any longer.

Worst c***s are the ones know fucking know you were before them and then they do a kind of smug look as they get served first.

1 hour ago, Boghead ranter said:

Or those daft bints that either wave a banknote at the staff, or worse, snso their fingers.

As you say, have an awareness of who was already waiting when you came up to the bar, you'll get served in turn. Good bar staff know who's next (99% of the time)

I briefly worked in Johnny Foxes about 7 years ago and it was pretty easy, even on a Saturday night, to memorise your section of the bar as to which order the customers were to be served.

Bar staff who have to ask 'who's next?' all the time shouldn't be doing that job.

Edit - see when they're pouring a pint and they're looking around, that's them looking to see what order the punters are in.  I certainly used that time to do that anyway.

@yoda amirite here brother?

Edited December 11, 2018 by TheScarf

[Hedgecutter]

1 hour ago, smpar said:

I’ve come across a few sound c***s recently who have done the “he was first” gesture when the server has gone to serve them first. Can’t wait for Christmas party c***s to completely ignore this beautiful piece of pub etiquette because their need for a bottle of Corona simply can’t wait any longer.

I find that 8/10 the server will give the "who was next?" gesture, in which case I think it's common courtesy to answer his implied question honestly if there are only a handful of people at the bar and you're only 'wasting' 5 secs of time. 

That said, this idealism goes out the window at a busy bar, simply because I was sick of giving up my place to another person, only for ten other c***s to get served after him/her and before me.

[The Moonster]

I was down in Manchester a few weeks ago and we jumped into a wee pub for a quick pint/something to eat before a gig. I got to the bar and said I'd like to order food, the barman said he would take my order at the till down the bottom.  The bar was quite busy so he got there before me and this old cow started rhyming off her order at him, he politely said sorry I'm just taking this gentleman's food order to which she turned round, looked me up and down, sighed and said "why, is his order more important than mine?".  I was in a jolly mood and this amused me more than it annoyed me, but the barman was clearly at the end of his tether with these entitled wankers in his pub, I could tell he was using every ounce of his will power not to leap over the bar and throttle the silly bint. I didn't see if she got served next but if I was the barman I'd have served whoever was standing directly next to her just for the laughs.

[Melanius Mullarkey]

1 minute ago, The Moonster said:

I was down in Manchester a few weeks ago and we jumped into a wee pub for a quick pint/something to eat before a gig. I got to the bar and said I'd like to order food, the barman said he would take my order at the till down the bottom.  The bar was quite busy so he got there before me and this old cow started rhyming off her order at him, he politely said sorry I'm just taking this gentleman's food order to which she turned round, looked me up and down, sighed and said "why, is his order more important than mine?".  I was in a jolly mood and this amused me more than it annoyed me, but the barman was clearly at the end of his tether with these entitled wankers in his pub, I could tell he was using every ounce of his will power not to leap over the bar and throttle the silly bint. I didn't see if she got served next but if I was the barman I'd have served whoever was standing directly next to her just for the laughs.

So, did you pump her or not then?

[Hedgecutter]

4 hours ago, TheScarf said:

No just along the bar.  That weird phenomenon is reserved for the Wetherspoons only in Inverness.

Patrons of the Archie Simpsons Wetherspoons in Aberdeen (a layout with a centre aisle leading from entrance up to middle of the bar ) have evidently decided to form a big queue up the aisle and only go to the bar when a server becomes free (think train station ticket desk / Post Office), something that perhaps only began a couple of years ago despite the layout never changing.  This isn't a system that has ever been imposed on them.  Bizarre.

Edited December 11, 2018 by Hedgecutter

[The Moonster]

2 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

So, did you pump her or not then?

She was a firm wid not and I was there with my girlfriend. So, yes. Yes I did.

[Hedgecutter]

On 14/04/2016 at 11:49, Believe The Hype said:

Computerised tills are certainly dumbing down the newer bartenders. The state some of them get into when trying to add the cost of a few drinks or work out change 'manually' is quite frightening.

The common one is when somebody gives them e.g. 10p too much (so that they can receive simple pound coins in change rather than £X.90p that requires more coinage) and the servers simply crumble on the spot.

Put the 10p in your open till and instead of giving me a fifty and two twenty pence coins, give me a single pound coin.  How can this possibly be so difficult? 

Edited December 11, 2018 by Hedgecutter