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Business / corporate speak nonsense


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25 minutes ago, coprolite said:

Would it not be more effective to use some form of artillery? Move with the times. 

They've probably just moved on from ballista or trebuchet :)

Had a very long, boring meeting yesterday...the word the hive mind seem to have a hardon for at the moment is "space"....not in any fun Star Trekky way though....in a sense of working in "the digitisation space" for example as opposed to what normal people would call working in digitisation.

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28 minutes ago, Hillonearth said:

They've probably just moved on from ballista or trebuchet :)

Had a very long, boring meeting yesterday...the word the hive mind seem to have a hardon for at the moment is "space"....not in any fun Star Trekky way though....in a sense of working in "the digitisation space" for example as opposed to what normal people would call working in digitisation.

Reminds me of one of my all time favourite quotes: "i think we need a bigger net" 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/769891.stm#:~:text=BBC News | UK | Chucked girlfriend breaks pelvis&text=Daredevil Stella Young is recovering,catapult made by her boyfriend.

 

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Quote

Labour’s promise to the business community includes scrapping business rates and more public investment in sectors like the green economy.

Reeves also announced a range of proposed policies designed to help startups and small businesses, including greater independence for the British Business Bank to invest in fast-growing companies.

“The French are starting to eat our lunch when it comes to investing in startups,” she said. “I want us to get a slice of that action.”

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

Was in a meeting with a client about zoning up our customer services response times and call handling. We had 3 missed calls during this meeting, 2 of which complained to the client who forwarded on with all cc'd in regarding it. 

Still awaiting the response to my email with a screen cap of the call times and a screen cap of my calendar with the meeting showing all available staff on said call. 

The other moan was the bounce back email giving 3 working weeks for a response, again I don't think they appreciated me showing the dates their 3rd party are providing important factors to be used for the month being nearly the 3 working weeks into the month and the explanation that we can't go quicker without this and they are pointing their ire at the wrong place as we are only trying to manage the expectations of the response.. 

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4 minutes ago, weirdcal said:

Was in a meeting with a client about zoning up our customer services response times and call handling. We had 3 missed calls during this meeting, 2 of which complained to the client who forwarded on with all cc'd in regarding it. 

Still awaiting the response to my email with a screen cap of the call times and a screen cap of my calendar with the meeting showing all available staff on said call. 

The other moan was the bounce back email giving 3 working weeks for a response, again I don't think they appreciated me showing the dates their 3rd party are providing important factors to be used for the month being nearly the 3 working weeks into the month and the explanation that we can't go quicker without this and they are pointing their ire at the wrong place as we are only trying to manage the expectations of the response.. 

^^^TLDR

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15 minutes ago, scw1987 said:

I read it but don't have a clue what it said. Business/corporate speak nonsense thread for this post, I think.

Oh, wait...

In truth I did read it, but didn't really take it in either.

It was a bit like work, I was internally screaming "who fucking cares!"

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2 hours ago, weirdcal said:

Was in a meeting with a client about zoning up our customer services response times and call handling. We had 3 missed calls during this meeting, 2 of which complained to the client who forwarded on with all cc'd in regarding it. 

Still awaiting the response to my email with a screen cap of the call times and a screen cap of my calendar with the meeting showing all available staff on said call. 

The other moan was the bounce back email giving 3 working weeks for a response, again I don't think they appreciated me showing the dates their 3rd party are providing important factors to be used for the month being nearly the 3 working weeks into the month and the explanation that we can't go quicker without this and they are pointing their ire at the wrong place as we are only trying to manage the expectations of the response.. 

You did this deliberately, didn't you? 

Please say you did.

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4 minutes ago, hk blues said:

You did this deliberately, didn't you? 

Please say you did.

I meant to put speach marks on that particular nonsense term 

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3 hours ago, weirdcal said:

Was in a meeting with a client about zoning up our customer services response times and call handling. We had 3 missed calls during this meeting, 2 of which complained to the client who forwarded on with all cc'd in regarding it. 

Still awaiting the response to my email with a screen cap of the call times and a screen cap of my calendar with the meeting showing all available staff on said call. 

The other moan was the bounce back email giving 3 working weeks for a response, again I don't think they appreciated me showing the dates their 3rd party are providing important factors to be used for the month being nearly the 3 working weeks into the month and the explanation that we can't go quicker without this and they are pointing their ire at the wrong place as we are only trying to manage the expectations of the response.. 

I was so baffled reading that I thought you might be my boss but you didn't use the words "conscious of time in that space" so carry on.

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4 hours ago, weirdcal said:

Was in a meeting with a client about zoning up our customer services response times and call handling. We had 3 missed calls during this meeting, 2 of which complained to the client who forwarded on with all cc'd in regarding it. 

Still awaiting the response to my email with a screen cap of the call times and a screen cap of my calendar with the meeting showing all available staff on said call. 

The other moan was the bounce back email giving 3 working weeks for a response, again I don't think they appreciated me showing the dates their 3rd party are providing important factors to be used for the month being nearly the 3 working weeks into the month and the explanation that we can't go quicker without this and they are pointing their ire at the wrong place as we are only trying to manage the expectations of the response.. 

As this wall of text is confusing. 

TL:DR - client calls meeting with ridiculous name to place blame on issues caused majorly by themselves / their other 3rd party

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Because I now work in a special ed. school we have innumerable acronyms/abbreviations....

IOP, PHP, RS, OT, ST, AR............and (as the Ronco adverts would say (that's one for the things kids wouldn't understand thread)) many more!

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7 hours ago, weirdcal said:

As this wall of text is confusing. 

TL:DR - client calls meeting with ridiculous name to place blame on issues caused majorly by themselves / their other 3rd party

Nope, not helping...

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5 hours ago, Raidernation said:

Because I now work in a special ed. school we have innumerable acronyms/abbreviations....

IOP, PHP, RS, OT, ST, AR............and (as the Ronco adverts would say (that's one for the things kids wouldn't understand thread)) many more!

FFS.

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