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  • 2 weeks later...
2 minutes ago, Nkomo-A-Gogo said:

https://www.rte.ie/news/business/2023/0508/1381314-google-security-officer-dismissed/

I wasn't sleeping. I just had my eyes closed for a loooong time!

That's a belter of a story - and defence. 

"I wasn't sleeping, I just had my eyes closed for a long time after self medicating my wives anti depressants and couldn't hear the phone because I had my ear phones in listening to music - so how can you sack me?"

:lol:

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Reminds me of a civilian who worked for the police with my dad about 20 years ago. His job was to look after the prisoners. Every 15 minutes, check on them in their cells. Bring them food, drinks and so on. 

One Inspector went down and chatted with him. After about 15 minutes the Inspector asked if he was going to check on the prisoners. 

"Aye, in a minute".

The Inspector left, then came back a minute later and there the guy was, still sitting in the same position reading his newspaper. 

Long story short, they checked the CCTV and found that this guy hardly ever checked on them. Shift after shift, he sat reading his paper. He got sacked, too. Didn't put up any kind of defence though, he was just a lazy fucker. 

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20 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said:

Tremendous compo face from this Clydebank man and his daughter, neither of whom could be arsed to check the dates of her exams before booking a holiday

16760281.jpg?type=mds-article-962

https://www.glasgowtimes.co.uk/news/23510950.dad-hits-learning-sqa-exams-held-may-holiday/

 

Why does the daughter look like a 40 year old mother of two?

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6 hours ago, Mark Connolly said:

Tremendous compo face from this Clydebank man and his daughter, neither of whom could be arsed to check the dates of her exams before booking a holiday

16760281.jpg?type=mds-article-962

https://www.glasgowtimes.co.uk/news/23510950.dad-hits-learning-sqa-exams-held-may-holiday/

 

Sheignneth...

WTF is that supposed to be?

I googled the name and she must be quite uniquely monikered, as this story is most of the results 

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11 hours ago, Mark Connolly said:

Tremendous compo face from this Clydebank man and his daughter, neither of whom could be arsed to check the dates of her exams before booking a holiday

16760281.jpg?type=mds-article-962

https://www.glasgowtimes.co.uk/news/23510950.dad-hits-learning-sqa-exams-held-may-holiday/

 

Oh well,that's him failed his "booking holidays to fit in with exam dates" O Grade

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41 minutes ago, deegee said:

https://www.greenocktelegraph.co.uk/news/23512617.man-makes-700-mile-journey
 

For whatever reason, this story came into my newsfeed. I don’t live in Greenock, so maybe someone more local can confirm this headline- grabbing event is the main thing to happen in the town recently?

how the hell did it take him 17.5 hours to drive from Birmingham to Gourock, buy a barbecue and drive back.  Can only presume this is an elaborate ruse to give him a bit of time to pump his bit on the side without his wife getting suspicious.

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1 hour ago, HK Hibee said:

how the hell did it take him 17.5 hours to drive from Birmingham to Gourock, buy a barbecue and drive back.  Can only presume this is an elaborate ruse to give him a bit of time to pump his bit on the side without his wife getting suspicious.

“In his electric car”…he had a nice hour stop at a high voltage charger halfway and at the shop, that’s were the side bit comes in. 315-350 miles each way…5+11 to 5+45…so 11+30, plus 3 hours on the chargers, 30 minutes to buy it, and an hour for lunch and dinner…gets him and his car serviced twice plus a grill.

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10 hours ago, HK Hibee said:

how the hell did it take him 17.5 hours to drive from Birmingham to Gourock, buy a barbecue and drive back.  Can only presume this is an elaborate ruse to give him a bit of time to pump his bit on the side without his wife getting suspicious.

That was my initial thought too. Say it’s 4.5hrs drive but add 30-40 mins for a decent stop each way. Why was he in the shop for 7 hours and who told the newspaper? I bought shirts in a shop the last twice I was across in Ireland with work this spring. Can’t say that I felt like calling the Irish Times, nor did my chat with the lady at the till go beyond friendly pleasantries. 
 

I’m going over to Dobbies later; I’ll ask folk at the door where they live, in case I can get a scoop for the Stirling Observer. 

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On the subject of Hitler...

https://www.grampianonline.co.uk/news/no-offence-intended-says-organiser-of-buckie-coronation-ev-313208/

The Buckie Fishermen's Hall played host to a 'Blast from the Past' event on Saturday and held an indoor Coronation street party on Monday.

image.png.1fdb5bda0cb81038d1310a9627cbe1a0.png

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