carpetmonster Posted December 1, 2022 Share Posted December 1, 2022 14 minutes ago, Stu said: One of my articles seems appropriate for this thread. I’d say my Pulitzer is in the post but with all these strikes, who knows? https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-news/castle-douglas-baker-forced-make-28619129 Midget gems are way too hard and chewy for an empire biscuit. If you've still got an open line to the big chief I'd suggest jelly tots to them. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'WellDel Posted December 1, 2022 Share Posted December 1, 2022 52 minutes ago, Stu said: One of my articles seems appropriate for this thread. I’d say my Pulitzer is in the post but with all these strikes, who knows? https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-news/castle-douglas-baker-forced-make-28619129 Irving's are a tremendous empire biscuit maker. Nice, light shortbread-y biscuit rather than some of the other heavy and stodgy efforts you come across. Delightful. A midget gem on top is a fucking affront though. Thoughts and prayers for a swift supply chain resolution. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted December 1, 2022 Share Posted December 1, 2022 (edited) 1 hour ago, carpetmonster said: Midget gems are way too hard and chewy for an empire biscuit. If you've still got an open line to the big chief I'd suggest jelly tots to them. Is there a difference between jelly tots and dew drops? From my initial investigations I assumed they were the same and Jelly Tot was a brand name. 1 hour ago, 'WellDel said: Irving's are a tremendous empire biscuit maker. Nice, light shortbread-y biscuit rather than some of the other heavy and stodgy efforts you come across. Delightful. A midget gem on top is a fucking affront though. Thoughts and prayers for a swift supply chain resolution. Their biscuits are fantastic but - and ignoring my need for journalistic impartiality - this is an outrage. BREAKING: From the Irving's Facebook page after someone else suggested Jelly Tots: "Have looked at other sweets, but very few that we can purchase by the pallet load, as we manufacture around 4500 packets of biscuits each week" Edited December 1, 2022 by Stu 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted December 1, 2022 Share Posted December 1, 2022 33 minutes ago, Stu said: Is there a difference between jelly tots and dew drops? From my initial investigations I assumed they were the same and Jelly Tot was a brand name. Structurally, I think. Jelly Tots are flatter, like a cow poo, whereas Dew Drops are longer and more oblong, like a hard nipple or a kinda squished bullet. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted December 2, 2022 Share Posted December 2, 2022 15 hours ago, carpetmonster said: Structurally, I think. Jelly Tots are flatter, like a cow poo, whereas Dew Drops are longer and more oblong, like a hard nipple or a kinda squished bullet. ^^^ Big Innes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted December 6, 2022 Share Posted December 6, 2022 Love the use of the word "chib" in the headline Convicted killer caught with caught with an eleven-bladed chib 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 20 hours ago, scottsdad said: Love the use of the word "chib" in the headline Convicted killer caught with caught with an eleven-bladed chib Some phenomenal seasonal product placement in there. Why even bother bringing back The Snowman. On the night of the 2009 murder, Allen had been drinking with Mr Black before attacking him with a lamp and a glass Irn-Bru bottle then slitting his throat with a kitchen knife. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TxRover Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 1 hour ago, Hedgecutter said: Some phenomenal seasonal product placement in there. Why even bother bringing back The Snowman. But a true Scotsman would have sliced his throat with the broken Irn-Bru bottle. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 1 minute ago, TxRover said: But a true Scotsman would have sliced his throat with the broken Irn-Bru bottle. An Irn-Bru bar that had been nibbled on along one edge and placed in the freezer made for an excellent knife (that could be easily disposed of in a tasty manner). 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 5 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: An Irn-Bru bar that had been nibbled on along one edge and placed in the freezer made for an excellent knife (that could be easily disposed of in a tasty manner). @Shandon Parcut his own throat doing that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 21 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: @Shandon Parcut his own throat doing that. My mum broke a tooth on a Wham bar so you do have to be careful with these sweets right enough. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gallo24 Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 https://planetradio.co.uk/borders/local/news/jedburgh-funeral-directors-crash/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 I lost a tooth eating a toffee crisp at Brockville. I remember the day well. My dad was in hospital having damaged his back carrying a coffin, so my brother took me to the game. We beat Queen of the South 7-1. Went directly to the hospital to give him the good news that a) he missed a fantastic win and b) the tooth fairy was expected to cough up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 10 hours ago, Gallo24 said: https://planetradio.co.uk/borders/local/news/jedburgh-funeral-directors-crash/ Fourteen bodies have already been recovered. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 2 hours ago, GordonD said: Fourteen bodies have already been recovered. Didn't realise that Suzuki offered the Vitara in optional 'hearse' trim. Very niche............... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sugna Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 14 hours ago, Gallo24 said: https://planetradio.co.uk/borders/local/news/jedburgh-funeral-directors-crash/ She gave me the wrong code for a key safe. True story. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 3 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: Didn't realise that Suzuki offered the Vitara in optional 'hearse' trim. Very niche............... Go slower stripes as well. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HibeeJibee Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 Fella has been charged with attempted murder (ironically enough in the Sheriff Court on the opposite side of the street). Tried to kill his ex-partner and her mother who run it. Charged with domestic abuse and breaching bail at same time. On an unrelated note I'm interested somebody bothers to put 'Established 2022' on their shop... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 9 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: Didn't realise that Suzuki offered the Vitara in optional 'hearse' trim. Very niche............... Who wants Zoe to do their funeral? I want a proper undertakers name, Isaiah, Zebediah or the like. It's not just females, who would want Darryl or Jaxon presiding over the do? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 8, 2022 Share Posted December 8, 2022 Used to do a bit of work for a funeral director. He’d ring me up and in his Rev I M Jolly voice say “hello it’s Jim the merry mortician”. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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