Shandon Par Posted January 26, 2019 Share Posted January 26, 2019 2 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Some night on the sauce for the dog tbf. Losing a leg and nicking a tractor. AKA “The Heather Mills Story” 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 Not exactly local news but...Boy, 12, has 39 MAGNETIC BEADS stuck in his urinary tract after inserting them into his penis 'out of curiosity' https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6664901/Boy-12-39-MAGNETIC-BEADS-stuck-penis-inserting-curiosity.html Quote Dr Wang Jun of the Wuhan Children Hospital's urology department told Hubei Television that the child at first said he had swallowed the Buckyballs, which were each about five millimetres in diameter. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 4 hours ago, The Master said: Not exactly local news but...Boy, 12, has 39 MAGNETIC BEADS stuck in his urinary tract after inserting them into his penis 'out of curiosity' https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6664901/Boy-12-39-MAGNETIC-BEADS-stuck-penis-inserting-curiosity.html Had a w**k and shot the cat? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 5, 2019 Share Posted February 5, 2019 Who did this? https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/who-did-this-on-camperdown/ Well, who did it? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 6, 2019 Share Posted February 6, 2019 https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-47129953 Now, I don't doubt that this is a real condition but what I want to know is how she knows what these things taste like: Ann - a dusty brass ornament Hannah - tasteless banana Jack - old battered leather footstool that's been kicked around a bit John - leathery button on an old man's cardigan Madison - ear wax with chocolate Marie - a wooden varnished statue with real human hair Sean - mouthful of furniture polish 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
senorsoupe Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 I want to take a moment to congratulate this American local journalist for this brilliant lede http://bangordailynews.com/2017/06/14/news/midcoast/maine-woman-attacked-by-raccoon-drowns-rabid-animal-in-puddle/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 13, 2019 Share Posted February 13, 2019 BREAKING NEWS: Most over-dramatic use of BREAKING NEWS ever. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 Possibly the greatest court report ever. https://www.gloucestershirelive.co.uk/news/gloucester-news/im-pitchfork-full-story-gloucestershires-2542172 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A96 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 No shit , Sherlock https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-humber-47242501 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 Possibly the greatest court report ever.https://www.gloucestershirelive.co.uk/news/gloucester-news/im-pitchfork-full-story-gloucestershires-2542172Can't wait to hear how the appeal goes. What a fucking fruit loop. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 Don’t know where to start with thishttps://www.fifetoday.co.uk/news/fife-teacher-let-pupils-watch-shrek-porn-video-1-4875335 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 21, 2019 Share Posted February 21, 2019 What a winker. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/man-faces-trial-over-claims-he-repeatedly-winked-at-woman-in-dundee-pub/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 21, 2019 Share Posted February 21, 2019 3 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: What a winker. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/man-faces-trial-over-claims-he-repeatedly-winked-at-woman-in-dundee-pub/ I guess the severity of the crime depends on exactly which eye he used. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bell™ Posted February 21, 2019 Share Posted February 21, 2019 https://www.cumbernauld-news.co.uk/lifestyle/cumbernauld-cosplayers-get-engaged-at-sci-fi-convention-1-4876067 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted February 21, 2019 Share Posted February 21, 2019 Slow news day at DC Thomson HQ. "Eh, Derek, whits happenin the day?" "No a lot Jimmy, hang on I'll have a look oot the windae" "Oh look the fire alarm has gone off across the road, false alarm though" "f**k it, that'll dae" https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/ongoing-hundreds-of-dundee-students-evacuated-as-fire-crews-rush-to-school-and-university/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted March 2, 2019 Share Posted March 2, 2019 Misread this headline. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted March 4, 2019 Share Posted March 4, 2019 https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/video-heartbroken-dundee-residents-have-theory-on-what-caused-shop-fire/ Quote VIDEO: ‘Heartbroken’ Dundee residents have theory on what caused shop fire A "theory" on the cause, you say? Maybe there were previous warnings about some kind of faulty electricals? Or perhaps a resident knew there were flammables being stored there? Quote Jayne Kelly from Save Our High Street Lochee said the fire had left residents devastated. She said: “We don’t yet know how the fire started but one theory I was told was that it could have started in the roof.” Oh. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted March 5, 2019 Share Posted March 5, 2019 Quote Still smoking outside Ninewells Hospital? These young patients are here to ask you to stop Comments 20 minutes ago Amfear Liathmor Encouraging Dundee's Paedophile smokers to gather outside the entrance of Ninewells Hospital is not a good idea. https://www.thecourier.co.uk/fp/news/local/dundee/841576/still-smoking-outside-ninewells-hospital-these-young-patients-are-here-to-ask-you-to-stop/ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted March 6, 2019 Share Posted March 6, 2019 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted March 6, 2019 Share Posted March 6, 2019 LoL 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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