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Facts you made up


Mak

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Alloa was founded by a Hawaiian, Koa Haluunamatatuuanu,  who arrived one July in Scotland and finding Port Glasgow a bit too violent and also Baltic headed east to settle in Clackmanninshire. He felt the natives would lap up his pineapple on a pizza idea especially after closing time. Many flocked to his shop and a village was founded. He was asked to name the new settlement but after a night on the Skol he wasn't easy to understand so his continual mumbling of 'aloha'  to those he encountered was misconstrued and wee Joe Doyle wrote the new charter with his best guess at the spelling. The pizza shop flourished until kebabs arrived in the area in the late 2000's.

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The Dolfijn class submarines of the Royal Netherlands Navy were actually the hollowed out carcasses of pilot whales with their mouths sewed shut, a periscope fitted to the blow hole and a shaft turned propeller protruding from the anus.

Crews complained that the vessels were cramped and smelly.

The Royal Netherlands Navy finally decommissioned the Dolfijn class in 1982 after Chrissie Hyde publicly defecated in Groningen town square holding a placard stating 'Sailing about in dead whales brings shame on the Land of Tulips.  Fucking stop it now. New single 'Back On The Chain Gang' released September 24th'

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On 27/05/2021 at 11:49, topcat(The most tip top) said:

Similarly Inverness Caledonian Thistle and Ross County are actually the same people in different disguises

In the Shetland football league, Lerwick Spurs and Lerwick Thistle play on Tuesday and Friday nights respectively as they share the same squad of players.  This allows the top players to get twice as much game time from a small league, double the chance of them winning a league title and get weekends off to watch mainland-mainland football.  Whenever Spurs play Thistle, the best XI play for whichever team is highest up the league table at the time.

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In 1524, Nostradamus predicted that Scotland would benefit massively from three controversial VAR calls at the Euros of 2021.

Of course, his ramblings were discounted at the time,  as everyone knows the Euros are played on even years - the fucking idiot. 

Edited by qos_75
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45 minutes ago, qos_75 said:

In 1524, Nostradamus predicted that Scotland would benefit massively from three controversial VAR calls at the Euros of 2021.

Of course, his ramblings were discounted at the time,  as everyone knows the Euros are played on even years - the fucking idiot. 

Nostradamus predicted that seven days after the end of the universe Scotland would win the World Cup.

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It's commonly accepted that the logo of Ronnie Dio's heavy metal band Dio when turned upside down reads, depending on who you believe, Die or Devil. In fact it reads as FiFi and is a heart warming nod to his favourite pet, a giant poodle. Neither Ronnie nor FiFi are/were involved in Satanic messaging.

Edited by The Skelpit Lug
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11 hours ago, TheScarf said:

Sharon Tate signed a contract to become the fifth member of The Who before she was murdered in 1969.

Roger Daltrey played in several bands before The Who.  These include The Where, The When  The How and The Why.

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