GordonD Posted July 28, 2016 Share Posted July 28, 2016 The survival expert Bear Grylls wanted to name his first son after his favourite boxer, George Foreman. It was only when he went to register the birth and the bloke started pissing himself laughing that the penny dropped and he changed his mind. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted July 28, 2016 Share Posted July 28, 2016 On 23 July 2016 at 21:38, NewBornBairn said: The Impressionist painters got their name because they did impressions whilst painting. Claude Monet did a vicious impression of Prince Albert which was why he was never offered any commissions by Queen Victoria. This is where the saying "show me the Monet" came from. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shooboax Posted July 28, 2016 Share Posted July 28, 2016 Falkirk is the soapless capital of the world due to the fact they don't use soap but prefer to urinate on their hands and wash with that thus relying on the amonia to kill the body germs they have because they don't use soap. Plus they traditionally don't brush their teeth so they fall out and they can issue posh blowjobs to each other. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 (edited) The village of Wejre, Poland, has been quarantined by the World Health Organisation since 1984. Thirty pensioners doing aquarobics died due to the genetics of the locals' urine having become resistant to the effects of chlorine. Edited July 29, 2016 by banana 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 Pittodrie's Dick Donald Stand has been slowly subsiding for years as Stewart Milne designed and built the thing not taking the weight of supporters into account. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 Oil workers from Aberdeen are so fat that they have been banned from Pittodrie incase it sinks into the sea. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dee_62 Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 2 hours ago, D.A.F.C said: Oil workers from Aberdeen are so fat that they have been banned from Pittodrie incase it sinks into the sea. Pittodrie is derived from an old Scots word meaning quicksand. - the clue was always in the name! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat(The most tip top) Posted July 30, 2016 Share Posted July 30, 2016 Facts that are about Dunfermline for this pish Doesn't realise quite how many square miles there are in Dunfermline 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted July 30, 2016 Share Posted July 30, 2016 The nonsense language spoken by Bill and Ben the Flowerpot Men was created by voiceover artist Peter Hawkins after he heard his young son farting in the bath. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mortar Bored Posted July 30, 2016 Share Posted July 30, 2016 Wave energy research is being carried out in poor parts of Africa by testing near Hippo colonies due to the wave effect of their vegetarian diets and digestive systems. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pittsburgh phil Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 Creepy 'pick a random box' TV star and possible Yewtree interest Noel Edmonds has three testicles - two in his wizened scrotum and one, roughly the size and texture of a raisin, which he wears on an amulet round his neck.He claims it is from a genuine 10th century Indian holy man and insists that it maintains his youthful appearance whilst giving him the power of life and death over contestants in helicopter based segments of any tv show he appears in. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mon Dieu Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 I can feed the entire forum with five loaves of thread and two .gifs @Pete Rockwell 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cream Cheese Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 9 minutes ago, Mon Dieu said: I can feed the entire forum with five loaves of thread and two .gifs @Pete Rockwell You could feed the entire world with your gif patter MD. Some will choke on their own seeth, but it's worth it for the greater good. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 I can turn green dots in to red, it's hardly miraculous. G-Bo -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richie95 Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 Pie and Bovril posters MozzaMozza, Throbber and Grimbo have all been granted the freedom of Saltcoats bench and the caravan parks around it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dindeleux Posted July 31, 2016 Share Posted July 31, 2016 When Euro 2016 started I was giving the missus the usual good news "52 games in X amount of days" and "4 weeks of back to back football" etc etc. Just to annoy her. Anyway after England drew the first game (and a few other teams got beat etc) she kept asking if they were out, is this the last game and on and on. I kept just saying "group stages" to her. Anyway I was watching the final with her bro-in-law and she came in with her sister and asked me a stupid question about extra time. So I started telling the boy how daft she was and how little she knew about football (although no doubt she'll be out singing the sash on OF day and posting multiple Facebook updates about the mighty Gers). Anyway, she asked me to stop slagging her and I said: "Its hard not to when you don't understand the concept of a round robin phase of a tournament". What? "The round robin phase - the group stage" Ahhhhh ok and here comes my made up fact........... "Do you know why its called the Round Robin stage?" No "Because back in the old days before leather footballs they used to kill robins, the little birds, and ball them all up covered in tar and kick that around and that was the first football". I completely forgot about this until last Saturday when I heard her telling this fact to a mutual friend at a party. He gave me a knowing look. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted August 1, 2016 Share Posted August 1, 2016 9 hours ago, Dindeleux said: When Euro 2016 started I was giving the missus the usual good news "52 games in X amount of days" and "4 weeks of back to back football" etc etc. Just to annoy her. Anyway after England drew the first game (and a few other teams got beat etc) she kept asking if they were out, is this the last game and on and on. I kept just saying "group stages" to her. Anyway I was watching the final with her bro-in-law and she came in with her sister and asked me a stupid question about extra time. So I started telling the boy how daft she was and how little she knew about football (although no doubt she'll be out singing the sash on OF day and posting multiple Facebook updates about the mighty Gers). Anyway, she asked me to stop slagging her and I said: "Its hard not to when you don't understand the concept of a round robin phase of a tournament". What? "The round robin phase - the group stage" Ahhhhh ok and here comes my made up fact........... "Do you know why its called the Round Robin stage?" No "Because back in the old days before leather footballs they used to kill robins, the little birds, and ball them all up covered in tar and kick that around and that was the first football". I completely forgot about this until last Saturday when I heard her telling this fact to a mutual friend at a party. He gave me a knowing look. You are Brian AICMFP 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted August 1, 2016 Share Posted August 1, 2016 The European Space Administration use the Dulux colour chart as their official star colour classification scheme. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted August 1, 2016 Share Posted August 1, 2016 4 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: The European Space Administration use the Dulux colour chart as their official star colour classification scheme. er what constellation is this 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O"Grady Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 The charcoal from a cremated dog is widely used in Chinese medicines and perfumes 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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